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It’s so very true, when you choose to have a baby your life will NEVER be the same again, I am fifteen and my baby is due tomorrow, I had the choice of abortion (I found out at five months) and I said no, I’ve seen the ultrasounds, I’ve seen him kick and I couldn’t imagine having ended his life. You know, you don’t have to become the single mother that you are so dreading, there is adoption that you can do, it would be so very hard to give up your child but always keep in mind that you are giving him life and not giving up on him. Maybe you are not ready for a child and you need to finish your education and wait till you are stabilized enough to provide for him but don’t choose abortion just because it seems like the easy way out or that you are pressured into it, just ask any of the girls on here that have gone through with it and they will tell you how much they regret it each and everyday. Adoption is always as much as an option as keeping him, remember that. You can even try and keep him for awhile and if it doesn’t work out you can put him up for adoption..Don’t kill an innocent child though just because you’re pressured into it or because you’re scared, you need to be brave for your self dignity and your unborn child. Good luck and I wish you the very best!!
Well first off CONGRATULATIONS!! There is a loooooooooong journey ahead for you but it is SO worth it! About the cramping, have you had any unusual discharge or bleeding? Those are bad signs but I suppouse you’ll be having your first prenatal checkup ASAP anyways so just talk to your doctor there! Congratulations and good luck!
P.S. I think you’re having a girl, I don’t know why I just do 🙂
Way to go for giving your baby life, he is your child and for no reason should the way he was conceived change the way you love him for any reason. To think that children conceived in rape is to think that their lives have no worth and that is so far from the truth. How awful your own family cannot see how strong and beautiful both you and and your child are. I agree with what loveU said, if they can’t love him for who he is then THEY are the ones that don’t deserve to be in his life, not the other way around. I am so happy you gave him life and now love, what an amazing person you are. I wish you and your son a life of happiness and I hope you will get through these hard times sooner than later. There are also lots of support out there, people who are there to help with situations like these, maybe educate your family a little more…Look into these options for you and your baby 🙂
And of course, we girls (and some guys) here at standupgirl are ALL here to help and offer our support so never be afraid to reach out for help!!Lots of love,
AnnaThat is so incredibly unfortunate, I am so sorry this is happening to you, I find it strange that your Mother cannot just enjoy being a mother to you and a grandmother to your child but then again people think in mysterious ways. Chances are this is going to fall through becausre you are right, your Mom does not have a case. Just be confident and brave, tell your story as it is and get all the support from the people who want you to do well and have a wonderful life with your new daughter. Congratulations and way to go for deciding to keep her, I believe everything will turn out in the end, it’s just too bad this had to happen,
good luck and keep us updated, we are all here to help,
lots of Love,
AnnaThe first person I ended up telling was my Mom, this was because I was at the doctors for a regular check up and to get some results from a test for my stomach and ended up finding out I was 5 months along, let me tell you something, she was more excited than I was. One person I was afraid of telling was my Dad, he is a really laid back guy and super down to earth but I just had these terrifying visions of him yelling at me for being so damn stupid and not waiting and all that jazz, but to my utter shock and amazement he was super happy to find out and was telling me that the baby was a blessing from god and all that stuff…So you really never know until you do it and truthfully it is better to get it out now because you’ll want you mom’s support (if she’ll give it) and help and maybe she’ll help you save up and get ready as well. Cause it will be tough to do it without the baby’s father around as well, so you need to be realistic and get all the support you can get, starting with the family. I wish you the best of luck and tell me how everything goes, I am here to offer my support.
Lots of love,
AnnaI am so sorry for your loss, I cannot even begin to imagine what it must feel like to have that happen to you. I am glad that you are resting and taking some time off for yourself, treat yourself good because you deserve it, this baby was just not ready to be apart of this world and maybe it was for the better, baby could have been really sick or disabled in some way, take care of yourself and I wish you the best of luck next time you go for mommyhood.
Lots of love,
AnnaCongratulations on your decision! I choose life for my child as well and I am so thankful I did. Even though the decision is hard I found that the one thing I didn’t regret was offering my child a life of his own to grow and expirience, and I getting the privilege of being a part of it. Bless you and your new child and I hope your family grows stronger with this new addition!
That’s so intense, I was five months when I found out I was pregnant and the said abortion was an option. I couldn’t do it. I just couldn’t.
You should probably get it checked out just too be sure, While it’s a super small chance, there’s still the chance.
Wow I had the same problem around the same time as you..You’re almost six months right? I had it during my 5th and 6th month and it was horrible, a lot of unneeded stress that’s for sure. I actually ended up going to the doctor one day because of how worried I was and here’s what he said.
If you’re really anxious lie down in a quiet place where you can relax, for one hour time each little kick and flutter you feel no matter how slight…I think it’s 10 kicks at least you should feel in an hour. Chances are girl, the more you stress out about him not moving the more you probably won’t feel him when he does. Don’t worry about it, this will pass. Wait till you start worrying about stillbirth and SIDS! Woops SORRY! Don’t go there, just relax and enjoy your pregnancy, it’ll be over wayy too quickly!Wow that is rough. Unfortunatley as teenage mothers we have to expect negative comments and blunt ignorance. Also very unfortunatley some of that may be coming from family which makes it so much harder, such as in your case. All we can do is know that we are doing an amazing job and our children love and respect us because we are their parents and that to them, is everything. You are doing an amazing job and if you’ve gotten this far what makes her think you can’t keep doing it?? Stay strong girl and look past the ignorance, you are doing amazing.
Hey don’t worry too much!! My doctor couldn’t find the heartbeat when I was five months one time and that was only because my little guy was being cheeky!! If it was your fist prenatal visit and the baby is stil so teeny weeny it’s not a suprise they couldn’t find it, everything should be ok as long as you haven’t had any other symptoms a long with it (cramps, headaches, bleeding!) if you are concerned though you can always drop in to your doctors and they can help you to figure out the problem.
Good luck and keep us updated!
AnnaBefore I say anything else there is something you really need to know. You said that "She’s all i think about and i feel terrible for just giving up on her." You DID NOT give up on her!! You gave her life and you’re trying to do the best you can for her, that is not giving up. You are approaching this as a strong woman and I congratulate you on that. I am only fifteen years old and any day now I am having my son who I’ve decided to keep, this will be a challenge for me but I chose life for him, and I’ve chosen to keep him because I believe that is what is best for him, and whatever decision you come too, I know it will be in her best interest. I am so happy to hear you gave your child life, that is the best thing you could’ve done. I wish you the best of luck hun, stay strong and you can do this!!
-AnnaFirst off, taking a pregnancy test is NEVER a waste of time. If you think you are pregnant for any reason, find out for sure!! It sounds to me from your symptoms that you could be, and you couldn’t be. So in other words it’s pretty much impossible to tell until you get it checked out for sure. Go to your doctors office and get him to do it (it’ll cost you nothing and will be more accurate) That way you can know for sure. And if it turns out you’re not pregnant you can talk to him (or her) about the symptoms you are having and your cause for concern.
Hope everything works out well to your liking!
Take care,
AnnaIs baby involved with the ministry or what’s the story? That can be a tricky situation! I’ve heard a bit of your story, you’re putting bubs up for adoption am I right? Things are going smoothly? I’m sorry, I feel silly commenting here when I don’t know much of the story I just wanted to offer my support to you and I hope that it works out for you,
GOOD LUCK and talk to me anytime you need to,
lots of love
AnnaI personally don’t think you are pregnant, but you never know. My best advice would be to go to your GP and get tested there, it doesn’t cost anything and is a lot more reliable! Go soon so you can get it figured out!
just wait till you’re ready, it sounds like you’re doing fantastic right now so maybe you should just wait till you and your boyfriend get married and then you can really have everything set in place. 🙂 the choice is yours, good luck love!
AnnaThis really pisses me off, he needs to take FULL responsibility for his child and help you out. Instead of being a deadbeat daddy you need to find a way to get his ass in gear by putting your foot down and maybe even taking some legal action and taking him to the courts and looking at custody options. It sucks but unfortunatley if a man doesn’t want to be apart of your child’s life he can decide not to and just fuck off. You can see if he truly is serious enough by taking certain actions but it seems like this guy is just not ready to be a dad and is only going to make a half hearted attempt. Good luck sweetie, lots of love,
Annahmm…My first thought was that an old romance comes back into the picture and it’s so exciting and passionated and all that jazz so that when you look at your present boyfrien it’s kind of like the same old thing, nothing new, nothing exciting. The fact is, if you reeally love this old boyfriend and want to be with him for a long time what are the chances that eventually he’s just going to be the same old thing to you? Excitement and lust are great, but not so much when they can hurt someone you really care about..your present boyfriend for example. Think it over and see if this is a impulsive decision based on lust and what not or if you truly love this guy and would leave your boyfriend of two years for him. I don’t know, it’s really all up to you, good luck though, I hope it works out to your liking.
AnnaI’m so sorry about your miscarrige. That is ridiculous how one hospital would say you’re fine and the other would say you were miscarrying, how unfair to not do more conclusive tests to find the underlying problem. How are you doing now hun?
Need to talk anytime I’m here for you,
AnnaYeah you should definitley go see your GP as soon as possible. Right down ALL of your symptoms, how frequently they occur, when they’re most intense and how long they’ve been going on for. This could be a number of things so you’d better get to that Doc and find out for sure!
Hope I helped at all,
AnnaI found out I was pregnant when I was 5 months. I am only 15 years old and had just gotten my life back on track when I found out…I had a week to decide for an abortion and it would be a painful three day process, 3 days knowing that I was murdering my unborn child. When I found out the baby was perfectly healthy and even sucking his thumb in the womb I decided I could not, ever, harm my baby. I had to choose then if I wanted to put him up for adoption or keep him. I asked my boyfriend and he said that he wanted to keep him. I am now 8 months pregnant with my beautiful baby boy and his name is Odin Phineas Jasper Vickers and I wouldn’t give him up for the world. My advice would be, as scary and hard as it will be you will never regret choosing life for the beautiful baby growing inside of you.
thanks for the support! 🙂It breaks my heart to hear these stories about girls who went through with their abortions. I found out I was pregnant at five months and I had a week to decide if I wanted to have an abortion…I decided against it. I’m so sorry to hear that you didn’t have support when you needed it, it truly isn’t fair that parents do that to their children, it may be scary for them to see their babies growing up or being faced with a situation that may deem them "bad parents" but they fail to see how much they are hurting you and how capable you are of being a wonderful mother. As far as the suicide goes, I’ve been there, I was suicidal for years and years and then one day I lost it and tried to end it all. The next morning I woke up strapped to a hospital bed with an impaired liver and the grief stricken faces of my family surrounding me. One of the things that really brought me back to reality was seeing just how badly I hurt the ones I loved the most. They don’t deserve it and you don’t deserve to take away all the amazing expiriences and things that you have yet to do in your life. Please don’t be too hard on yourself, there is a person waiting for you, waiting for you to have his child and to raise a family with. Things will turn out for you, you cannot take away all the things the world still has to offer. Be strong girl, you are worth it.
Lots of love,
AnnaWow, I’d be a little concerned if i was in your situation, bleeding during pregnancy is normally a cause for some concern and you are normally advised to seek proffesional advice from a doctor. You could also call the nurseline which is a great 24 hour service that can help you out with any questions or concerns you may have. If you’ve already talked to your doctor and everything seems a ok then all I can say is DAMN that sucks, I’ve loved these 8 months of being period free, I feel sorry for you that you’re not getting a break lol. Anyways best of luck with your pregnancy girl, write me back anytime,
lots of love,
Anna
