Forum Replies Created
-
Posts
-
Hi gangy and enya 🙂
Thanks for the great ideas. I’ve been consecrating and lighting candles for her for a long time and sometomes when I’m sitting under the stars, I feel really close to her.
It helps that I’ve started working because I have less time to sit around and mope. Keeping busy really helps!I really do think so. Parents sometimes say things they don’t mean because, like us, they don’t always know how to react immediately to the unexpected… As unbelievable as it is, they’re human too 🙂 dads tend to be very protective of their daughters and I think what he said before is really just last minute toughness. Did it help in some way to hear your mum say that?
Lots of hugs, E xoxoHi there sweety,
Take a deep breath and relax… Stress can make you feel things that aren’t aren’t always there and sometimes pregnancy symptoms can just be pms. When you have unprotected sex there’s always a chance of falling pregnant. Take another hpt and if it’s neg and you’re still late then get a blood test. You can worry about telling your bf and parents after you’ve found out for sure. Your parents might be a bit disappointed, but they love you and they’ll support you no matter what. And if your bf doesn’t stick around and support you and a baby that was created in love, then quite honestly he doesn’t deserve you. Being a daddy takes alot more than biology.
Best of luck and pls give us an update when you’ve found out what’s up.
Prayers and positive thoughts,
Evangeline xoxoHi there,
It’s not an easy decision to make, but I really feel that it’s your decision and that no one should be allowed to influence it or force you to do anything you don’t want to, especially if it’s something this serious and life changing. Have you thought of adoption? There are alot of couples who’d give anything for a child of their own and would give your baby everything you feel you can’t.
Check out http://www.abortionfacts.com for stories from women who’ve had abortions as well as abortionists. There’s also alot of info on PAS and a section with info that will help you make an informed decision.
Personally, I am pro-life. I’ve had an abortion that I’ve regreted every day since and I wouldn’t wish the emotional turmoil in my worst enemy.Prayers and positive thoughts,
Evangeline xoxoIt’s always easier to think of girls names 🙂 and those are really beautiful! I especially like Ella and Marley.
And boys names… I’ve always liked Jude, Janik and Anthony.
Have a great pregnancy!
EvaI think writing a letter is a wonderful idea:) poetry is also a great way of expressing your emotions.
Also, what Enya’s saying is true. Having a memorial helps some women cope, We kept our daughter’s remains and buried them in our garden, then we planted a tree above it, as a sort of ‘grave stone’. Some mothers also light a candle on the day of the day their baby should have been born and keep it burning for 24 hours. I’ve also heard that art, gardening and keeping a journal have helped women deal with their emotions.
Love and hugs for all the mommy’s to angel’s in heaven,
Evangeline xoxoHey there sweety,
Try to tune out all those people who upset you, because they don’t know what you’re feeling, people say what they think you need to hear and sometimes upset you even more. I’ve also heard the “it isn’t alive” and “we’ll have another baby” crap and it’s times like those I wanna scream!!!!!
You cannot turn back the clock, but you can learn to live with it. Take your time, try to find understanding and forgiveness for yourself before you tackle any other issues. You have to deal with your grief in your own way, because what works for others might not work for you. Also try going for therapy when you feel up to it:)
If you’re having nightmares or other sleeping problems, try getting a prescription for something to help you sleep, it’ll make a big difference.
Keep posting and updating us on how you’re doing.
Hugs, prayers and positive thoughts,
Evangeline xoxo>hugs< parents can be so cruel sometimes! my mom's always said that if I came home pregnant she'd perform the abortion herself- never told her we were expecting. I don't think your dad really meant that, I'm sure if things had worked out differently he'd be a proud and happy grandpa.
Hi sweety,
can’t help much except on the meds fron tof things. the first trimester is very important, so speak to your doc about which meds are safe to use.
for info on using przac during pregnancy, go to: http://www.babycenter.ca
and trazodone: http://www.wellsphere.comHope that helps,
Eva.Hi girls, thanks for taking time out to respond 🙂
my gp has kindly informed me that it’s all in my head 🙁 so I’m back on anti depressants to make the pregnancy symptoms go away. so, i’m not pregnant, just going cookoo.Hi there, I’m not a mom but in my final year we probably had about 7 girls who had babies and managed to keep everything together, so it’s not impossible. With internet classes you have to be really self motivated, so if you think you can handle that or that it’ll be better for you and your babies then I think that’s a great option.
Good luck 🙂
Evangeline.Ok, firstly get yourself tested for HIV and other stds, I know you don’t want to worry about that now, but it’s very important that you do so and go back after your three month window period for a second test.
With unprotected sex there’s always a chance of pregnancy, but the soonest you can tell is usually after a missed period. Blood tests are more accurate than hpts. Stress also affects your menstrual cycle, so try and relax even though its tough.
Evangeline.Hi girl, congrats on the pregnancy 🙂 I think it’s I great that you’re standing up and taking responsibility for your actions! Teen pregnancy has always been a taboo and quite a lot of people still think you should be ashamed of it. Truth is, the only shameful thing is igoring the consequences of your actions.
It sounds like you have a wonderful, supportive bf and that makes a big differance. You don’t have to be scared or worried, most young mothers finish school and get a higher education BECAUSE they have a baby and want to make a better life for them.
Sure, people might give you odd looks, but who cares?! You can’t always please everyone, all that matters is the love and support of your bf and parents.
Good luck and keep posting. I hope you have a happy and healthy pregnancy.
Evangeline.Hi there, the other girls have given you great advice already and I agree 100% that you should tell them the truth, it’ll show you’re being responsible and are ready to face up to your actions. Make sure they hear it from you and no one else, that’ll just cause unwanted negative vibes. If you need extra support, take along a supportive, trusted family member.
Sometimes adults also need reassurance, so tell them that despite your choices in the past, you are not making a mistake now and that you plan on keeping the baby and raising him/her. You can also ask them for their support, tell them that their input is important to you and that you value their advice in your decision making:)
Tension creates tension, so tell them in a calm environment. Try and eliminate interruptions, there’s nothing worse than having to re-start a difficult conversation.Expect some strong emotions, they just need time to process everything you’ve told them. Be open to listening to their opinions and feelings, you expect them to do the same for you, right? But at the same time, don’t let them change your mind about keeping the baby.
I really hope this helps in some way, let us know how it goes.
Hugs, Evangeline.Hi Gabby, I’m very sorry for your loss but I think it’s great that yr using this experience to try and stop other girls from going down the same road. It takes alot of courage to use your pain to help others because often talking about it is one of the hardest things you can do.
I hope you’ll continue posting and sharing your experience.
Hugs, Evangeline.I don’t think you know what you’re letting yourself and your dgf in for. A lot of ites wil tell you that a post abortion syndrome does not exist, but I’ll tell you from experience that since my own abortion and right to this day I suffer with guilt, anger, regret and depression so sever I’ve tried to end more than once.
I have read that some women feel nothing but relief afterwards, but I have yet to meet one of those women who are happy about having killed their child.I’m not going to preach to you, what’s done is done, but if you feel you aren’t mature enough/ ready in anyway for a baby then you shouldn’t be making them. Yes, mistakes are made, a lot of us here know that, but how we deal with those “mistakes” is what sets us apart. But if you know that there is any chance of her falling pregnant then you both should have taken precautions so that you would not have to be making a deciion like this now.
Having a baby is not the end of the world, a lot of the single mothers here can tell you that. And why are you so opposed to adoption? There are many couples who are dying for a baby but are not able to conceive, you’d be saving your baby and making another family very happy. I just don’t want you and your dgf to go through what my dbf and I have. Fortunarely we are still together, but after an abortion most relationships don’t last.
I wish the two of you well, whatever you decide,
Evangeline.Hi there and big hugs! I can completely relate to your feelings of guilt, it’s absolutely normal to feel that way. It’s going to take a while for you to come to terms with the decision you’ve made, but remember why you decided to do it… If you’re finding it especially hard to cope or develop symptoms of comlicated grief, then it’s very important that you see a therapist to help you work through what you’re feeling.
I hope you’ll continue to post and maybe start a blog, writing about your experience and your emotions can also be very theraputic.
Evangeline.Hi hun, big hugs and welcome to SUG. I’m really glad you found this site.
Having an AB is NOT the answer, trust me on that one. You will scar yourself emotionally for the rest of your life.
I agree 100% with Kylie’s mommy, rather choose adoption if you have no other options.
You can also try speaking to a school counselor or a therapist, it really helps tp get a fresh perspective and you’ll have someone close to home to talk to after you’ve made your decisions.I hope you’ll keep posting and update us on how you’re doing.
Lots of prayers and positive thoughts coming your way,
Evangeline.Hi hun,
That doesn’t sound normal, so you should definitely have it checked out asap, because if you are pg you need to get the best care for yourself and your baby.
Best wishes,
Evangeline.Big hugs hun, yr at the right place if it’s advice yr looking for. I am so that yr in this predicament and so confused about solutions. I know what it’s like to be faced with the question of what the next step is.
Not all women have morning sickness, so if that’s all that’s really motivating your decision, please think again- I can’t describe to you how I would do ANYTHING to feel that way again. If you have made up your mind, get counseling before and after, it’s imperative that you prepare yourself emotionally.
If you’re still uncertain, please think again about this. A lot of the girls here will tell you that an AB is not final and that emotionally there are alot of repercussions.
A baby is a blessing, we are never given a task that God doesn’t think we’re capable of doing.Whatever you decide, please keep posting and update us on how you’re doing. Prayers and positive thoughts,
Evangeline.I cannot tell you how happy I am to hear that 🙂 You’ll always have support and kind words here too, so pop in and keep us updated on how you and baby are doing. I hope you have a happy and healthy pregnancy! Hugs and best wishes,
Evangeline.:cheer: very exciting news about the twins, congrats!!!! will light a candle for you and your precious girls. stay safe and take extra special care of yourself.
Big hugs and welcome to SUG… This is not going to ruin your life, there are plenty of women who have had children during their teen years and made a success of their lives. You just have to talk to someone you trust.
It might be pms and you stressing about being pg may make you feel pg symptoms. Wait untill AF is late and then take another test, you can also ask your doctor for a blood test- they are seldom wrong.
Till then, take care of yourself 🙂 and keep us posted.
Evangeline.
