GangY

im so sorry that you are in this situation, i really am.
sometimes i think that the abortion was the right decision for me, back then when i was 16. but then again…i doubt in it.
do you know that there is a possibility that you will never get pregnant again? or carry a baby full term? i dont want to be hars,sound hard or rude but…i had my bortion at 16…4,almost 4 years ago…and i have lost my twin girls in the end of my second trimester.
they were perfectly healthy,my cervix wasnt….and a weak cervix is one of the many possibilities you get out of abortion.

i have two little girls, who i carried and loved for more than 20 weeks, whos hand i have hold for 1 and for 10 days….i LOVE them, i got the possibility to know them, yet there are moments when i cry about my aborted baby.

you have a job-you said so, why not look into the other option, keeping it? many times things seem unbearable for us, but somehow just ”fall in the right place” with time.

i could see a difference at 8 weeks (but i had twins) at 12 i had a tiny bump, at 14 you could tell im pregnant =)

i am really sorry for your loss. whenever you want to talk…just PM me, ive been there, i know how much it hurts!

i am so sorry for your loss… if you ever want to talk, just PM me…i sadly do know the pain youre in 🙁

I thought of you and closed my eyes
And prayed to God today
I asked “What makes a Mother?”
And I know I heard Him say.

“A Mother has a baby”
This we know is true
“But God can you be a Mother,
When your baby’s not with you?”

“Yes, you can,” He replied
With confidence in His voice
“I give many women babies,
When they leave is not their choice.

Some I send for a lifetime,
And others for the day.
And some I send to feel your womb,
But there’s no need to stay.”

“I just don’t understand this God
I want my baby to be here.”
He took a deep breath and cleared His throat,
And then I saw the tear.

“I wish I could show you,
What your child is doing today.
If you could see your child’s smile,
With all the other children and say…

‘We go to Earth to learn our lessons,
Of love and life and fear.
My Mommy loved me oh so much,
I got to come strait here.

I feel so lucky to have a Mom,
Who had so much love for me.
I learned my lessons very quickly,
My Mommy set me free.

I miss my Mommy oh so much,
But I visit her every day.
When she goes to sleep,
On her pillow’s where I lay

I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek,
And whisper in her ear.
Mommy don’t be sad today,
I’m your baby and I’m here.’

“So you see my dear sweet ones,
your children are okay.
Your babies are born here in My home,
And this is where they’ll stay.

They’ll wait for you with Me,
Until your lesson’s through.
And on the day that you come home
they’ll be at the gates for you.

So now you see what makes a Mother,
It’s the feeling in your heart
it’s the love you had so much of
Right from the very start

Though some on earth may not realize,
you are a Mother.
Until their time is done.
They’ll be up here with Me one day
and know that you are the best one

hei. welcome to the site.

you seriously need to go to the doctor. its time to grow up. why hide? you are pregnant, you decided to have sex, and you decided to keep it.
now you have to tell the people about it. if not, go to your pediatriciam, he will send you to the womans doctor if your mother refuses it.
you MUST start eating the prenatal vitamins, and you need to take care for your baby, that includes you going to the doctor!!

hei there, im Monika..
my heart really aches for you, i know how it feels to be in your skin…i was there, i had mine done back at 06…its going to be 3 years in october, but sometimes it feels like it was yesterday..

i think the best thing to do…firs just leave that guy behind, hes just not worth even a micro second of thinkin about him. it may feel hard, but eventually youll see that moving on helped you.

for my experience,youll see with time, that you are stronger than you thought,and with time, you will move on from the abortion. no you wont forget it, (im talking from my own experience),you will think about it every single day, one day more, some days less, but you will.. but the important thing is, you will LEARN TO LIVE WITH IT, i still have some depressive mood swings, but hey i am here, that means i grew inside,emotional & mental, and so will you.

it may seem impossible right now, but with time your heart will heal…with time and with alot of talking, thats what helped me, talking, writting… have you thought about writting…”letters”? to your baby or to a no-name person, just so that you get those feelings which are pressuring you out, cause as long you will keep them inside, and not let them out when theyll want to, you wont be able to make the irst, the importanst step to healing.

whenever you need to talk, just write to me!

love,
Monika

Hey!
Well first of all,about your boyfriend,if he’s saying NO to a baby,then you should ask him what he’s thinking,sex means possibility of a baby. He had also sex without the condom,and well…that leads to a baby.
Maybe you should clear that with him.

I think you should go to the docs so that hell make a test,so you’ll know for sure.

I’m talking out of my own experience,abortion is NOT an easy way Out..

I think you are grown enough to stand up for your baby!

And since I guess your parents will be a support system of you if you are pregnant,and probably will support YOUR decision you should tell them first..and if not,tell them after you’ll tell your BF,no matther what he says.

Keep in touch,
Love,monika

Hei Lisa,I’m Monika!

Its hard for the boys to understand the pain you and the ladys who have an early miscarriage are experiencing,you see they get so really attached to a baby after they hold him,see him,sense him,you understand?that’s why they can only TRY to understand the position you are in.
I think you have a great boyfriend since he’s trying to understand you,there are not many that even try..

My situation isn’t quite the same,I gave birth to my twin girls at 21 weeks..their dad..he is very sad,but more about Angie,I once asked him why,Ina was also his baby,and he said that well he got more attached to Angie since he spend more time with her..

I understand the longing after a baby,and so really..thres nothing thatll give/take/make it go away..
Just keep in mind that you want to give the best to your baby! And will wait till you can give him the pleasures like you said..I know it doesn’t help a lot,but…I don’t know what else I should suggest since I’m thinkin and wanting one too..

Love,monika

Your hair sounds great!I love everything with a touch of red!
I think its awesome! And changes are good..I was a blondy for 15years..then I colored my hair red 😀 in the meanwhile(past 4 years) I got back to all sorts of brown,but now I’m back to red..it fits to me.

I think that touch of red in your colour will make you feel good,I belive that red gives away positive vibes 🙂

You can totally get the colour out of your skin with ashes,I usually do it with the cigarett ashes.

I love the name daisy for the girl..you know,like the flower,so pure, so beautiful!
And for the boy I love alex..don’t know why 😀

But if not sooner you’ll just KNOW when you will see your baby for the first time..
I decided about the names before I gave birth..and when I saw them,I just knew it,I don’t know how to describe it,but you will feel it:)

Hei Charlotte!

My name is Monika and I can somehow relate to what your feeling for 100%.

It was,and still is,that wish of having children,the one which somehow ruled my life.
All I could,and am thinkin about is having a baby..

I also had my abortion at 16 (you have it under my blog),and also my parents till this day don’t know I had one.
I got pregnant in last september,but that pregnancy didn’t fulfill the loss of the aborted baby,I am still learning to forgive myself,and slowly heal (even if its been 3 years allready)
so that ill be free for another one.

I have lost my twin girls this year in february,they were born 2 soon..

I mostly have bad days cause of them..and even through the huge grieveing of their loss,there are still hours/evenings when I’m totally down cause of the aborted baby..

I guess this is the pain we are allways going to carry with us?

If you want to talk,anytime,just pm me!

Love,
Monika