Meg11

Dont be freaked out….I know you dont like needles but you will have your blood drawn…at your first appointment they usually take all your medical information and ask questions about your family’s medical history…they will probably screen you for STD’s and for AIDS.. they will measure your tummy and take your weight…and they will take a urine sample to test your hormone levels and make sure that you are right on track 🙂 your doctor will ask questions in regards to how you want to deliver to start you thinking about your birth plan…the sooner you start thinking about it and planning it the better it will be…it doesnt always go how we expect it to but it is better to prepare your mind and body….walk as much as your doctor says is fine drink lots of water and do some exercises to strengthen your legs and thighs and pelvic mucles….again check with your doctor and make sure you dont over do it 🙂 keep us all informed of how you are doing and take care….Love and Prayers…Meg

Well all I have to say is put him to the test…I got back together with my daughters dad when she was 3 weeks old (I even had a restraining order on him) I know exactly how you feel right now…with a new baby it feels like the two of you will have a fresh start and with all the distance you have had it is easy to forget what went wrong and it is easy to feel passionate and even tingly inside…well put him to the test….make him wait…DONT HAVE SEX WITH HIM… you could end up pregnant…and also it is easier to stand your ground if you are not in a vulnerable position (being emotionally attached during sex) if you dont have sex with him and he starts flaking out it will be easier to let him go….if he really wants to stay around for you and Kian then he will wait until you are married to have sex again…if he wont marry you and wait until then to have you in that way…then what does he REALLY want….I will be praying for you..stand strong and think of your baby boy…not having a dad around is better than having a bad influence and an unhealthy lifestyle in your home….for now let him be a dad but not a boyfriend…if he cant respect the fact that you need time (after all he did walk out for most if not all of your pregnancy) and he cant understand why he cant come and go as he pleases then he has alot more growing up to do before he would meet your maturity level and even come close to being worthy of your hand….let us all know if anything changes…Love and Prayers…Meg

I dont count it a blessing to lose a baby so I guess I’m not like alot of other people…dont get so sucked into depression that you lose focus of your family…for whatever reason we dont know but God allowed you to lose your baby….it may be a tough trial to go through and I know your hurt is overwhelming but just think…you were bummed at first when you found out….next time can you imagine finding out…you will need your kids to pull you and your husband down from the clouds you will be so excited…you are leaning to cope right now and maybe someday down the road a good friend or one of your daughters will have the same experience and you know what…you will be able to relate and help someone else through their tough time….just remember if you give your cares to the Lord He will work it all out…Tears endure through the night but joy comes in the morning…I will be praying for you…Love and Prayers..Meg

Are you trying to get pregnant??? It sounds like you know your cycle very well so you would probably know better about how and if you conceived….Are you married???? If you are not married the only way to guarantee to not get pregnant is abstinence…..having unprotected sex can lead to pregnancy so of course there is a chance that you could be pregnant…….if you dont start your period take a test or go to the doctor for one…..let us all know….Meg

As long as you provide for your baby and make good choices they usually wont take a baby from the mom…you need to tell your mom so you can start getting prenatal care…as for the racial issue shame on them…just keep treating them how you would want to be treated and let them judge if they want but dont give them a reason to and dont fuel their fire…just take care of you and the baby and please tell your mom even if you will get in trouble…Meg

Ditch the guy no matter how bad it feels to loose him….if I were you I would surround yourself with a good support system 🙂 go to a good Non-denominational bible teaching church and get plugged into a bible study…you would be surprised how many people in churches have been through hard stuff in their lives…sometimes people who go to church act like they are better than people who dont go to church but the truth is we are all rotten sinners!!! People mistake church as a place that you go to if you have all your ducks in a row but it is not!!! The church is a hospital for those who are hurting…I was just reading in Matthew today that Jesus went into the temple and drove out all of the hypocrites and began healing the blind and the lame…..it sounds like you have alot of hurt and grief in your life and the best place to be healed is in a group of people who love the Lord and who will pray for you and counsel you. One day you will meet a man who is worthy to be with you…until then there are others out there (even in the church) who are hurting and with your experience you can relate and understand…let the Lord use your story to encourage others to not give up…like myself…I work at a funeral home sometimes…I have lost many close friends and family members…I know how I wanted to be loved during the time of loss so therefore I love others in the same manner…I hope this helped and I will be praying for you..Love and Prayers…Meg

You should go to a doctor and get a blood test….if you are 5-6 weeks late and have a negative test go to a pregnancy resource center and get a free ultra-sound….most of them have the equipment now…You should stop having sex that is the only way that you know you wont get pregnant….form th esounds of it you have had a rough life…sex wont make you feel better….in the end it will make you feel just as unwanted as your parents have made you feel…save yourself for marriage (I may have messed up alot of times in my past with other guys but I didnt have sex with my husband until our wedding night and I have found self worth again) it is worth the wait and you wont ever have to fell confused or guilty again either….tell your guardian your situation and face the music….Meg

I am thankful that you have been given eyes to see how "wrong" it is for your girls to end up in these situations…at the same time we need to be careful not to judge and condemn these people… we need to stand up for what is right and we need to say what is wrong is wrong..but God knows the heart of each person and He is to judge not us…. I hope you continue to seek out these stories and share them so that people will have their eyes opened but I also hope that you will see how ugly sin is and start praying for these people…. you know that God sees every sin on the same level??? a tiny little white lie is as ugly as the mother of the 10yr old who allowed her daughter to be in that situation…. thinking a mean judgemental thought about the 12 yr old and her boyfriend is equal to murder in Gods eyes….I am not just saying this becuase I feel like it these words are in the bible….If you think a hatefull thought towards your brethren then it is as bad as murder…and looking at someone with lust in your heart is as guilty as adultry…. I think you should keep up the "preaching" to the young girls out there that these things are wrong but remember that you are not innocent either and I am sure there is plenty for God to judge in your heart as well as mine….if you want to know more about why I feel the way I do visit my profile and sign my guestbook and I’ll get back to you….Meg

Both of my children are fatherless babies…but….the do have a daddy…I got married in November and now my kids have the daddy they have longed for….it was not an easy road to be a single mom for 4 1/2 years and to know that my kids had two different dads and that neither one of them was man enough to step up and support their kids….I had fears at times that I wasnt enough for my kids and that I would end up exposing them to a dangerous person…but I also didnt date guys….I remained abstinent for 3 1/2 years untill my wedding night in November of 06….I spent time loving on my kids and I put a relationship far out of my mind until I met my husband….I met him at church and I watched how he interacted with my kids (as like they were his own) he had everyones respect and he was very well loved by everyone I knew….He respected me at all times and he even stepped in and helped me out financially when I needed diapers and stuff…we didnt even kiss untill we had been together for 8 months and we had sex for the first time on our wedding night…..forget about guys for now….it is better for your son to not have a father right now then it is for you to bring the wrong guy into his life….My encouragement to you would be to get plugged into a Non-denominational church where they teach right out of the bible….get him involved in a sunday school class and your self into teachings and bible studies…your chances of finding a good wholesome man (and daddy for your son) are very high at church….not everyone at church is a good person and not everyone in church is safe….remember satan could not defeat the church so he joined it…Seek first the kingdom of God and His righeousness and all other things shall be added…..that is the verse that gave me perserverance when it came to wanting a husband and a father for my kids….and you know what???when I quit seeking a man in my life and I started developing my relationship with my Savior and spending time just being a mommy that is when it happened…Pray over your son and ask God to protect him from harm….Perfect love casts out all fear…God loves us perfectly..unconditionally..and eternally…when you are afraid pray and commit yourself and your son to the Lord….your son will thank you when he is older for bringing him to the Lord..He is our Heavenly Father and when He feels it is the right time He will bring your son a father here on earth….I hope this helps..it sure did for me…..Meg

Go to a pregnancy resourse center they give free tests…two days is early to have symptoms but still get checked out….with pain in your side and swelling down there you could have an infection!!! go to the health department or a sliding scale clinic and get checked out…. I would stop having sex until your married and you wont have to worry about these things….I remained abstinent for 3 1/2 years before my wedding after 10 yrs of being sexually active so I know it is possible and that it is very rewarding…I never had to worry about pregnancy or STD’s…..let us all know how it goes…Meg

Well I havent been pregnant in 2 1/2 years but a friend of mine recently had a baby…she was told that she was having a little girl and after 4 ultrasounds (she had alot of complications so she was always getting them done) to confirm I had a PINK baby shower for her…little dresses and bows 🙂 well about a week after the shower she found out that Abigail was a bad name for a BOY!!!!! LOL well all that to say that one day she was at Ross shopping and she got stuck in the aisle….the only store clerk in sight was a man and she described him as the type who has never dealt with a pregnant woman…anyways she was sooo emotional and she was crying and her belly was so huge that the guy had to help her get unstuck (she was trapped between the cart and the shelf LOL) she recovered from the embarassment of being hormonal in public and she laughs about it now!!!! you will too one day :)…Meg

I dont think you are cruel or selfish….I used to feel the same way about my sister and her kids…I would be on th ecouch watching tv in the morning and her kids would be eating chips out of the bag and making a mess and she would be in bed….my nephew used to pee in the mop bucket and it was gross….my neice used to steal my stuff and hide things….I love my sister very much and she has changed over the years…when I look back it wasnt that I didnt ever want kids I just had the fear of being a bad mom…her kids are not and were not bad kids they just needed guidance and dicipline…she needed to clean up after them and get out of bed and give them breakfast….when I finally had my daughter I related to her alot more…kids are tough..they need constant supervision, freequent meals, they need to be cleaned up alot, have their hands washed, they need rules and consequences for not following them…..I learned the hard way but kids need two parents (it is possible to do it alone I did for 4 1/2 yrs) from the sounds of it your sisters have had premarital sex and your family has been left to deal with their consequences….praise God that you can see the challenges they go through…let this example in front of you "scare" you into not having sex untill you are married….If you are married one day and get pregnant I know your heart will be more willing to keep the baby instead of adopting (plus your husband and his family wouldnt be too happy about adoption LOL) I try my hardest to keep my kids in line…when we go out to dinner with all 3 kids we usually end up having a couple people come up to us and tell us "Your kids are so well behaved…." it takes alot of hard work but not everyones kids are a nightmare…I teach my kids to say excuse me if they need to say something…they are not allowed to interrupt an adult conversation….they go to the corner for not listening..they pick up their toys when asked…they say please and thank you…etc.etc. when you are married and decide to try it out and have a child or 2 or 3 or 4 LOL Raise that child to be respectful of other peoples things and to use good behavior dont let them be a nuisance…my kids are happy and they have alot of fun…but every where we go people are amazed at how they listen and obey…..dont let someones lack of parenting and responsibility steal away the joy you can receive from a baby one day……Meg