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Hiiiiiiiii! I’m Lisa and as I read your letter my heart went out to you. I know the stress and strain that being unexpectedly pregnant and wanting support can be. You see, I have had 2 abortions and I can share with you personally my experience and my heart if you’d like.
Let’s just say that you and I are sitting at our favorite coffee shop at the beach (my favorite place) and we are having our favorite coffee drink or hot cocoa. When you look across the table at me, you will only see the face of someone who is speaking to you with care and concern and love. There’s not any meanness in anything I say. E-mails are hard to tell what sort of mood someone’s in, so I like to set the stage first. 🙂
OK – with that said …
You said that you came to the site looking for support to calm your nerves. Why? Why were your nerves not calmed when coming to Stand Up Girl? Is it because you read all the stories of girls that did have abortions and the pain that we’ve dealt with afterwards? Goodness isn’t that a good thing that you see that before you make the choice to abort?
I had a girl that I was talking to near my home. She was pregnant and not even as far along as you. She was completely dead set on aborting. I told her my heart and shared with her what her heart would potentially feel afterwards. I explained my experience to her … and yet she was determined.
Not even a week afterwards she called me and said “What have I done?” She was tragically regretful.
You see, right now it seems like the right answer. It makes all my problems go away. But can I say that by having an abortion, it will never make your baby go away. You will still be a mommy. Abortion doesn’t change that.
You had mentioned seeing the foetus come out of you. (Did you know that the word Foetus is Latin for “Little One”?) In many cases yes this is true and in other cases no baby is visually seen. There is an amnionic sack and blood and water that will also come out so they are mixed in together. I will tell you that at less than 28 days your baby has a heartbeat already.
When you came to the Stand Up Girl website, we care enough about you to tell you the truth. There are others that will never be honest enough to tell you that abortion truly is a tragic choice. It comes with a lifetime of regrets and really and truly the e-mails you see on the site are from real girls that have had real experiences.
Please please see … we are here to help you. To help you make good choices for yourself. Not choices that you will regret for a lifetime … like some of us do.
Sometimes we may need to take a big step back and see … why does this make me uncomfortable? Is it possibly because something really truly rings true deep inside of you?
Can I share one of my most favorite photos? It’s an amazing photo and you are not far from this. Check this out:
http://www.pregnantpause.org/develop/minne.htm
Please please – consider the steps you are about to take. I can tell you have the heart to be a Stand Up Girl! All you have to do is decide … decide to Stand for the life of your baby. Don’t make the same mistake I made.
I regret my choices every single day!
Heyyyyyyyyyy. I’m Lisa and I wanted so badly to get back to you about these things you are going through. Ohh I so totally understand the pressure and the fear you have. You see, I chose abortion at 19 and can I tell you that there is NOT a day that goes by that I don’t think about my lost baby.
I know it totally seems hopeless, but please know that you have so many people around you here and around you where you are at at home that would love to help you. I even have a website and a toll free number I will give you at the end of my e-mail so you can call someone to get yourself some help. Weather it be financial help, emotional support or just someone to even talk to. Maybe a place to live? Maybe a good OB doctor who can give you some GOOD advice and not a cold doctor who just goes with the general flow.
You know what I usually say? Being a Stand Up Girl is not always easy – but it’s always worth it!
You see, you and I are on a road called life. When we both came to a fork in the road, one road was called “Abortion” and the other “Life”. I chose the road of abortion and you still stand at that fork in the road. I am able to come back to you from that road and say “Please don’t take this road. Do you see that bend on the road ahead? There is nothing but sorrow, grief, pain, guilt and shame around that corner. There is a feeling of loss like no mothers heart can know and the reason that there is a bend in that road is because the ONLY way that you will ever understand it or know it is to walk it. Please … the road of abortion will be the very same for you, so please take that road of life. Grief with guilt is unshakeable! So please, tell me what it is like. I so wish I could go down that road instead. But I cannot. It’s too late for me and my babies. But it’s not for you and yours.”
OK – now that that is said, let me go down the road of your life a little bit. Trust me when I say that the choice of abortion is truly a tragic choice. Especially as you learn about the development of babies in the womb. You will NOT be able to get out of your head “What did my baby go through? What did my baby look like? What stage was my baby at when I aborted him/her?”
There are so many times when I just wish that I could hold my little baby in my arms. Just at least once. I wish that I could feel his breath in my hair or even to change my babies diaper and see my baby giggle. To see that little gumless smile and to touch my babies face. I will never be able to do that. I will never hear “Mommy”, I will never get to wake up in the middle of the night and go to look in at my beautiful little baby in his or her crib sleeping like an angel. I will never get to feel the movement of my baby in my womb – and ohh how I long to experience that.
Please know that no baby that I could even have today would replace the 2 beautiful babies that I aborted.
All of this to say – please understand that you have that motherly instinct strong and alive in you right now. Do NOT allow yourself to be deceived into believing that you can just go on with your life as normal after abortion. The world of abortion is a world of shame and it is NOT talked about very openly. Ohhh everyone says it should be legal and it’s OK – but how many girls do you hear talking – in passing saying “Oh yea, I had an abortion a couple of days ago. It was a pretty simple procedure.” You might hear a girl talking about getting a piercing or a tatt! But not an abortion. You know? Why? Because it is a painful, private and subject of shame. Especially those of us that have done it.
Please let me know what you decide.
Luv Lisa
Hey – I’m Lisa and I read your e-mail and wanted to respond as quickly as I could. I hope you can read this BEFORE you take the step of abortion. Because I made that step and trust me … abortion does not make your baby go away. Your baby stays in your heart as your heart aches for years to come. Please don’t think that abortion is going to make ‘all your problems go away’ because it doesn’t. Abortion is just the beginning of problems. I can tell that you don’t want to have an abortion and that you are trying to be sweet and please your bf. But if you take a Stand for the life of your baby – you will be far happier and you will be amazed that you will see THAT will be the first day of the rest of your life with your precious little baby. Please know that I’ve been down that road and it will change you forever. Please reconsider. At least post-pone your appointment and maybe talk more before taking that horrible plunge. Please respond. OK?
Hello – my name is Lisa and I wanted to come on and also share my heart with you. I’m so glad that you came on to share your heart and your stand. I hope you don’t mind if I do the same for you too. Please note that I come to you in the most gentle of ways that I can.
Firstly, I want to share with you that I have gone through the ‘abortion’ experience so please remember that I’ve crossed that path and know from personal experience. OK?
I must say that your love for this girl truly sounds solid and so wonderful. I would say that every girl would dream of having a man love her as much as you love your girlfriend.
With that love, I think that you are not seeing something. You see … she IS a mommy and you ARE a daddy right now. With all due respect, your sweet girlfriend is pregnant and though she may seem to also have decided that abortion is what she is going to do … I would bet anything that if you were to go to her and tell her “Honey, I love you and I believe in you. I want you to have this baby. I will take care of you and support you. I will not leave your side. We can do this. We can Stand Up together.” I bet she will melt and cry in your arms.
You see – usually abortion ends with HER heart in trauma. It’s something that most guys probably will never be able to understand because … well because they are guys they aren’t girls. Your girlfriend has something inside of her that is a nurturing mother. So when we allow the women that we care about go in and have her very own baby taken from her (which by the way is a permanent thing) something inside of her changes immediately! Something inside of her … dies. Her heart will always have something missing. That something that is missing is a person that was suppose to be alive … yet is gone. Then usually that trauma is manifested by hurt, pain, heartache which can grow into bitterness or resentment. Then … anyone that is associated with that child or abortion is only a painful reminder and will need to be removed from her life.
This being said – your relationship is in danger at that point.
The relationship with the father of the baby usually doesn’t last after abortion. She will search for ways to relieve the pain she has in her heart … you may not see it … but it is there. Often times she will turn to drugs, maybe alcohol, even the possibility of a promiscuous life … just to search for some way to fill that empty void in her heart.
Does any of this make sense to you? Please please please – if you really love her … don’t allow her to go into this place and have her heart broken. You are her protector. Be her hero and Stand for her. Stand with her. This baby was made in LOVE. Why would you allow her to kill this beautiful baby made in love? I promise you when you start to plan for this baby … your futures will be what you want it to be. This baby will give you BOTH the drive to achieve even more.
Please let me know what your thoughts are.
Hiiii – my name is Lisa and I read your Forum. I wanted to come to you from the perspective of having been down that road before. I totally understand your fear about your parents. My mom was pretty strict … but we lived with my grandmother. Believe it or not – she was the hard one and I was scared to death. So I chose to abort my baby.
Truly abortion may seem like the answer, but I promise you it is not. A few years after I had my abortion, I confessed it to my mom. She immediately put her hands over her face and cried. You see … I aborted the only grandbaby I could ever give her through me. Abortion hurt my insides and I am now, unable to have any children.
Please remember that abortion is FINAL! You said that you are 7 weeks pregnant. Do you realize that your baby is already fully formed and can even suck his/her thumb already. It’s amazing. Check out this photo:
http://www.pregnantpause.org/develop/minne.htm
I know that you are afraid … afraid to tell anyone for fear of what reaction you may get. I have a website that you can go to and also a toll free 800# you can call to just get yourself some local help. You could go to a nearby Crisis Pregnancy Home and have your baby there. There are so many people that would justlove to help you.
Here – let’s try this link:
http://www.OptionLine.org
800-395-HELP (4357)Please don’t sacrifice your future happienss just because of fear. Read all the many stories on this site and see what other girls have gone through. The pain that is in their hearts after abortion. Because of a lost baby. Please remember, you have help all around you. OK?
Let us know how you are and what you find on that website. OK?
Luv Lisa
Hi “Breathless”, my name is Lisa and I help Becky at the Stand Up Girl website with some of her e-mails and forums.
You sound like you are having a really difficult time with many things. So let’s start from the beginning. Firstly – I’d love to help in any way that I can. I hope that by my putting my heart to paper, that it will help you at least a little bit. J
I usually tell everyone that asks questions about pregnancy and protection – “If you have sex, you ALWAYS are running the risk of pregnancy.” Breast feeding does NOT make you 100% infertile. Not at all! That’s a common mistake many girls make. You STILL can get pregnant while breastfeeding if you are having sex. There is a certain criteria that you need to follow to MAYBE be ‘infertile’ while breast feeding – but even if you follow that criteria, it does NOT mean that you are infertile 100% nor does it mean it will work in every case. So breast feeding is not a sure way of not getting pregnant.
Breastfeeding on demand is quite exhausting for you. I would recommend a Le Leche League meeting somewhere in your area. You may be able to find one on line – but they really are helpful with moms and with wonderful breastfeeding advice.
Regarding ‘protection’ or condoms or any sort of birth control. Even if your husband is ‘not completing the act’ – you STILL can get pregnant. Just so you know that there is sperm in the man’s lubrication.:blush: So you STILL can get pregnant even if he does not complete the act. Really … no form of ‘birth control’ is 100%. I got pregnant using birth control and I talk to sooooo many girls on this site that have gotten pregnant while using every form of birth control you can think of.
Truly – there is only one form of birth control that IS 100% and that is ‘abstaining’ from sex. Now of course when you are married, you should NOT abstain from intimacy with your husband. It’s just not fair to him and when we get married, we are then vowing not to withhold our bodies from our husbands.
Now of course – before marriage, the best decision to avoid pregnancy is abstaining from sex. You know why I say that? Because, well I just got married a few short years ago and my husband and I saved ourselves until marriage. But you know – I wasn’t always like that. I just finally realized one day that my body was NOT to just be given to anyone that didn’t want to commit the rest of his life to me. Trust me – there was a time when I absolutely was in love … but it still does NOT make it a good thing to have sex before marriage. There is so much more than sex to learn about each other. You know what I mean? I have a whole married life to be intimate with my husband. And he even showed me that he loved and respected me by waiting until our wedding night. He showed me that he wanted me and loved me by waiting. I’ve learned a lot of lessons – and unfortunately, I’ve learned them the hard way. You know?
Why don’t you want to get pregnant again? Are you married? If you are married and if you get pregnant again – is your husband supportive? Are you able to stay home with your baby? Why are you so afraid to get pregnant again?
Sorry for all the questions. It’s just some questions that I ask to maybe help you to think it through too.
I hope that I helped at least a little bit. Take care.
Luv Lisa
Nicole – I’m Lisa and I am from the Stand Up Girl website. When I saw your e-mail I wanted to just run to you and to share with you the truth. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO HAVE THIS ABORTION. Nicole – this will destroy your relationship between you and your mom and life does not just ‘go on’ after abortion. Somehow, something changes inside of you. It did in me and I cannot get rid of it. It is a loneliness for that someone that you can never get back.
Nicole – please, I’m going to give you a website and a toll free 800# where you can get in contact with a nearby center in your area. YOU CAN DO THIS NICOLE. And your mom, in the end, will be greatful! I know you are trying to please everyone around you right now. But in the meantime, you will allow this to destroy you … and your baby.
Nicole – your baby, at 10 weeks, is completely formed and already has a heartbeat. Did you know that your baby can suck his/her thumb already and the sex of your baby is already determined. You are pregnant with a baby boy or a baby girl. Now if a baby sucks his/her thumb that is pleasurable to them. Right? Since they know pleasure, they also know pain and abortion is NOT painless. Please please Nicole – seek help from this site. You cannot be legally forced to have an abortion. This center can also help you find financial assistance, maybe even a place to stay for a time if you need it.
Just check out this site or call this toll free 800#
800-395-HELP (4357)
Please let us know how you are. Remember – it’s all about being a Stand Up GIrl and you can do this! I know you can. We will Stand with you Nicole.
Luv Lisa
Hiiiiiii – I’m Lisa and I am from the Stand Up Girl website.
When I read your e-mail my heart went out to you so strongly. I wanted to just wrap my arms around you and tell you "It’s OK – you CAN be a Stand Up Girl"! You CAN choose to let your baby live. Yesss you can. And can I say … your mom … she will be so overjoyed that you are choosing life too.
Please understand that your mom is ‘reacting’ right now. She loves you more than anything in this world. But she also gave you life. Imagine … what if she didn’t? You wouldn’t be here right now. And I have to say that I’m SO SO GLAD YOU ARE HERE RIGHT NOW. Aren’t you?
No – keeping your baby is NOT a selfish choice. If anything … it is COMPLETELY selfless. This child inside of you is alive and breathing and this is your baby. It truly is OK to give life to your baby. Please just give your mom time to be angry, to get upset, to maybe even cry. Then … guess what … she will most definitely be the first one standing in line to hold that little powdery bundle of joy. I see it time and time again.
Please – come here and share with us at the Stand Up Girl. You are NOT alone. We all join together and will surround you with encouragement and love. And on top of that I’d like to give you some information that will help direct you to get some help and maybe even some medical attention.
Let’s try this link and input your zip code. A list of free and confidential centers that are in your area will come up on your screen. Call them and tell them your situation and they will very gladly help you. I will be right here for you. OK? You can e-mail me at the Stand Up GIrl website too under the Dear Becky column. OK?
Here is a website and a toll free 800#. Remember – you are NOT alone!
800-395-HELP (4357)
Also – let me share an awesome photo. This will help you to see why those beautiful motherly heartfelt emotions are so alive in you. This is one of my favorite photos:
http://www.pregnantpause.org/develop/minne.htm
Please let me know how you are. OK?
Luv Lisa
Taryn – I’m so so very proud of you! And guess what. You are not GOING to be a mommy … you already are a mommy!
Congratulations. I’m overjoyed!
Luv Lisa:woohoo:
Dearest Taryn -hi! I’m Lisa and I help Becky here at the Stand Up Girl with some of her e-mails.
Taryn firstly can I say how so very very sorry I am that you had to experience rape and then on top of your distress, pregnancy and unmarried – not sure as to who the father is … and then of all things a lack of support from your parents for life.
Taryn – I have to say that I am so so proud of you! You have come here, let your hair down and expressed your heart to us and I think the reason is … you have the heart of a mother reaching out for help and encouragenemt … and love for you and your baby. Taryn, I truly believe that you ARE a Stand Up Girl. That the life of your baby … your very own flesh and blood … is a life worth saving. I know that you know that … and read every word of each girl that lovingly responds to you here. We all want to Stand with you.
I wish that I could go back and change what I have done and the choices that I have made. But I can’t. You see … I did choose abortion for my babies and there is NOT a day that goes by that I don’t regret it. I wish I could have another chance. Because if I could … I would choose life. I wouldn’t care about any other opinions around me. You know why? It’s my baby and not their baby. I have to live with the choice that I make … not them.
Please do know Taryn, that your parents do love you. They think that this is what is right in protecting you … but unfortunately society lies and says that abortion is good and safe. But it’s emotionally crippline and a scar that only the mother of her aborted child will carry with her.
I see, time and time again, moms and dads coming around. I mean … this little baby that you are carrying is their grandbaby.
Imagine this … Holding a 7 pound, warm bundle in your arms. You look down and you can hear little girgles and that little bundle smells just like a sweet baby powder smell. That little bundle looks up at you and all of a sudden … you get the biggest gumless smile you’ve ever seen! Your heart melts!
Taryn – that will happen. And a baby can be so healing … even in the case of rape. Life given even in the face of pain like you have experienced. And you know what? We are right here to help you walk though this experience.
I also have a link to help you locate a nearby free and confidential center and a toll free 800# in case you’d like to talk to someone who can give you some good direction too. And please, will you come here and let us know how you are and I WOULD LOVE to see a response from you that says:
I AM GOING TO STAND FOR THE LIFE OF MY BABY. I’M GOING TO BE A STAND UP GIRL.
Taryn – you can do this! I have total and complete belief in you!
Please let us know how you are.
800-395-HELP (4357)
Luv Lisa
Hiii – I’m Lisa and I am from the Stand Up Girl website.
You had mentioned that you were moving … is that right? I wanted to quickly just give you a response and say … often times we girls can miss our cycles when something stressful happens in our lives or something big happens. Even diet can cause you to have a late cycle or even to miss a cylce completely.
For isntance – if you have a pretty low body fat, or you excersize heavily, or you take a trip to a different time-zone, or you move or you are under a great deal of stress. These are all causes of the ‘possibility’ of a late or missed cycle.
I tell you what. I have a link and a tollf ree 800# to help you locate a free and confidential center in your area. Just click the site, input your zip code and a list of centers in your area will come up. Or call the toll free 800#
800-395-HELP (4357)
I would just call them, get a free and confidential test and relieve your mind one way or another.
Take care of yourself.
Luv Lisa
Erick is right on!
I’d also like to add this. Think about how your mom wanted you to abort Adyson before. Right? What would she say if you told her that you were going to give her away? What would she say if you told her that, God forbid, something happened to her?
You’d BOTH die of heartache and you’d do all you could to save that childs life. Right?
The child that is inside of you right now … is no different than Addyson and I guarantee that … you WILL be overjoyed that you chose life. I hear these words time and time again:
I can’t believe I was even thinking about aborting my baby!
Can you imagine life without Adyson? What sort of memories would you NOT have today if you allowed abortion? Can you imagine, if you had chosen abortion, what Adyson would have gone through? Can you imagine what Adyson might say one day if you were to tell her that her baby brother or sister is not here because you chose not to have your second baby?
Please mummy! Look down the road at the lifetime of regret you will have. I promise you … there is ABOLUTELY NOTHING GOOD about abortion. NOT ONE THING!
But I can think of countless things that abortion is. Painful, wrong, terrible, murder, painful to mummy and final.
So final. No going back and making it better or changing your mind.
Please … think about that. Your baby is so important … and so are you.
See – you already have a bunch of us clamering to talk to you. :laugh:
Luv Lisa
I read your post this morning and I also read Ericks and WOW! What a Stand Up Guy Erick is and he made some EXCELLENT points. It’s SO GREAT to hear it from a guys perspective because … you know what? He’s right!
We are spinning our wheels trying to make the guy happy – when in reality … we live with this decision of abortion for the rest of our lives.
Please re-read your e-mail response to me. You are so sweet you are trying to ‘please’ everyone around you. But you seem to be forgetting 2 people. YOU and your BABY. If your baby is the child of your boyfriend – you feel like you can handle having a baby … but if it is the other guys you can’t?
But … but it’s YOUR baby. This litte life is inside of you and living and breathing. Can I share a picture with you? It’s an amazing photo and read what it says down the right side of the photo:
http://www.pregnantpause.org/develop/minne.htm
This is ONLY at 6 weeks. That little one can suck his/her thumb already. And when a baby sucks their thumb, that is pleasurable for them. Sooooooooooo if they know pleasure … they also know pain. Abortion is not painless to your baby.
Please please – forget about all the other circumstances around you. Imagine not having the baby that you have right now. I bet you could NOT imagine life without your little one now could you.
The very same thing with that little baby that is inside of you. You have already bonded with your baby … and you are against abortion for a reason. And for good reason too.
It just takes Standing Up Girl! Remember – death is forever. Life for your baby can be so rewarding … who cares what the other guy says! He’s out of your life … and he has absolutely NO SAY SO in this matter.
You say that it wouldn’t be fair to your baby. Do you really believe that? Do you think that abortion is fair to your baby?
Please please think about this. Abortion for this baby is forever. You can never go back and change your mind.
Please let me know how you are. I will be thinking about you.
Erick – I’d love to hear more from you for Mummy too!
Luv Lisa
Hiii “Mummy 2 Addyson” I’m Lisa and I am from the Stand Up Girl website. I read your forum posting and I wanted to send you and e-mail as quickly as I could.
I just want to start this by saying please know that if you and I were sitting together – we’d be sitting across the table from one another having a juice or a Coffee Late’ and you’d be looking at a girl who cares about your heart and what happens to you. You might think that is strange because we’ve never met – but I want you to know that I also made the decision to abort my baby and after living with the pain and agony in my heart I want to share with anyone else that will listen the truth of that experience.
Firstly – I have to say that baby picture on your posting is so absolutely adorable. I assume that is Addyson your baby girl? She’s very very adorable!
Can I share something with you? The baby that you are pregnant with doesn’t have one parent. Your little baby boy or precious little baby girl has 2 parents and you, Mommy, are one of those sweet and loving parents.
The father of the baby may say to you that (as you said in your posting) “He doesn’t want you to keep the baby”. And your new boyfriend is “not really happy with you”. Can I ask you something with all due respect and I say this with surprise in my voice “What business is it of theirs anyway? This is YOUR baby. This is YOUR flesh and blood.” Right? Who do these guys think they are? They want the conveniences of a relationship with you … a sweet girl who is a good mommy to Addyson … but they don’t want YOU to have YOUR baby. “I want you to bear this emotional burden of allowing your baby to die – because it is what I want, it would be convenient for me and it would make me happy.” That’s kind of what I’m hearing.
Ohhhh – you can do this! You can have this beautiful little baby that is living and breathing inside of you right at this very moment! Did you know that at 6 weeks your baby can suck his/her thumb? That your babys body is completely formed and even the ears have a family resemblance already?
What if your new boyfriend were to tell you that he wasn’t happy with you because you have Addyson. And he told you to make HIM happy – that you need to give her up. Or … your ex tells you that he doesn’t want you to keep her … would you put her on the front doorstep and forget about her. Hoping that you could go on with your life and that your heart will forget her?
Please please know … they are asking you to do the very same exact thing with that little life that is inside of you right now. I can tell by reading your e-mail that not only do you have a beautiful heart to be a mommy to Addyson – but you already love that baby that is inside of you.
Trust me when I say to you that you will NEVER forget this baby. You will NEVER be happy with this decision. You’ve even said that you were normally against abortion. Can I ask you why that is? What makes abortion wrong? Because I really want you to look deep into your own heart and see that abortion is wrong for you and your baby too.
Please know that abortion will NOT make your baby go away. You will have that little baby inside of your heart forever. And the men that are telling you to abort your baby … they will have this memory attached to them and it will be extremely difficult for you. Trust me – I know. I’ve been down that road and the ache has not gone away. My arms still ache to hold my baby.
I tell you what. This website is called “Stand Up Girl”. I bet you that you will have a ton of e-mails that will post to your posting here. We will ALL Stand with you! Tell your boyfriend that if he loves you, he will be a Stand Up Guy and he will never ask you again to kill your baby just to make this relationship work. That if he wants to be with you bad enough, he will support you and be a man about it. "Because" … you can tell him … “I am going to Stand Up for the life of my baby – and if you won’t Stand with me, then you will need to step aside and move on.”
Once you give birth – do you remember what it was like with Addyson? Imagine how beautiful it will be with this baby.
Before I close – can I share a beautiful photo with you? It’s one of my favorite and I think it sometimes helps us to put things into perspective. Check this out and read what it says down the right side of it:
http://www.pregnantpause.org/develop/minne.htm
Please – I will also give you a link to a website that is in your area. I believe you are probably in the UK by your accent when you say Mummy. That’s so cute! I’m in the USA – but I have a link to help you locate a nearby center. Please let me know if you can’t find anything. You can e-mail me at the site any time … OK?
Here is the website and a phone number:
http://www.careconfidential.com/Default.aspx
0800 028 2228
Please – will you let us know what you decide? Will you be a Stand Up Girl? Remember, we’re right here for you.
Luv Lisa
Hiiiii! I’m Lisa and I am from the Stand Up Girl website.
When I read your e-mail, my heart lept for fear for you. Please understand, when you read my e-mail response to you, it is from a heart of caring and a girl that has experienced what you are considering doing. Abortion.
Please please know that NO MAN IS WORTH THE LIFE OF YOUR CHILD. I can tell you already have the heart of a mommy! You don’t want the abortion, and just by being at this website is a sort of wonderful way of reaching out.
Well I reach back to you and ask you to please take my hand … I will walk this walk through the pregnancy with you and I will encourage you as I know that countless other girls on this site will do for you too.
When we choose abortion, we choose, also a lifetime of regret and pain. Then the man that MADE you get the abortion will be attached to that memory forever. Bitterness often times follows and he is the one that is making you choose. Him and a house or the life of your baby.
Please please – life is so much better than the material gain of a home. And you will also be able to find, one day, a man that will absolutely and totally fall head over heels in love with you and your beautiful baby and want to make a protective covering and a home over you. Not threatent you with "If you don’t kill your baby – I won’t give you a home."
Please forgive me … I’m not upset with you … I’m angry that this guy puts the responsibility of this horrible decision over you and dangles a house in front of you like a carrot in front of a horse.
You are far better than that. You can be a Stand Up Girl and I will also give you a website to help you locate nearby free help. THey can help you locate financial assistance and more. I bet you … that your boyfriends tune would change IMMEDIATELY after he laid eyes on that beautiful bundle of joy.
Please – choose life for you and your baby. Don’t listen to him. THere is far better out there for you. OK?
Here is the website and even a toll free 800#
800-395- HELP (4357)
You can also e-mail me at the Stand Up Girl website or just reply here on your posting. OK?
Please let me know how you are.
Luv Lisa
Hi – I’m Lisa and I’m from the Stand Up Girl website and I just wanted to respond to your recent posting. Well – after reading your e-mail, I’m seeing that it is very definite that you ARE having sex.
Can I say one thing … it’s very important that you know and realize that even if your boyfriend does not ‘finish’ the act while you are having sex – you STILL CAN GET PREGNANT. There is sperm in the mans lubrication so pregnancy is still possible.
Please know that you are playing with fire right now. This is exactly how many girls find themselves pregnant and if he is telling you that you are not having sex – he is absolutely wrong.
I will also tell you that birth control is NOT an alternative. You STILL can get pregnant on any form of birth control there is. The only one you cannot get pregnant on is abstinence.
I got pregnant on the pill and I know many girls that have gotten pregnant using all other forms of birth control (even using multiple at one time). Birth control also does not protect you from STDs (Sexually Tranmitted Diseases).
I’m sorry to be so ‘straight forward’, but it is important that you do KNOW that you are definitely running a risk of pregnancy as you ‘play around’ like this.
I hope you will maybe consider backing off quite a bit. It really isn’t worth it. Trust me – I’ve been there, I know.
We have a place on our site where you can buy some really cool jewelry called "TLW" (True Love Waits) because it does wait. Would you like to check it out?
http://standupgirl.com/web/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=180&Itemid=107
I hope you consider this. It’s something that I chose to do before I got married and I will tell you it is so worth saving yourself until marriage. Really it is sooooooooo worth it!
Please think about it.
Luv Lisa
Hi – I’m Lisa and I am from the Stand Up Girl website. I am desperately typing this e-mail to you to encourage you … please choose life.
I’ve been down the abortion road before and I can just tell that you have the heart of a beautiful mother. Please don’t let the fear of the unknown cause you to decide the fate of your unborn child.
You have sooooooooooo many girls at this site that will STAND WITH YOU and encourage you to take a Stand for the life of your baby. Because once you take a Stand – guaranteed – it will be so much easier from this point forward. See – I think that often times when we are trying to ‘decide’ or aren’t quite sure what to do – it makes it seem so much more difficult.
But once you take a Stand – I think that even the father of your baby will Stand with you. You have a beautiful baby boy or baby girl inside of you right now that depends on you, mommy, for his/her very life. Abortion will not make your baby go away. Abortion only allows the life of your baby to be replaced with pain, regret, remorse and guilt. Please if you’d like some free help, I have a website and a toll free number that you can call and they would LOVE to help you through these steps of life. Please … take a Stand for the life of your baby. Be a Stand Up Girl.
I always say – "It’s not always easy to be a Stand Up Girl, but it is always worth it!"
800-395-HELP (4357)
Please – let us know how you are. I’d also like to copy a link for you. It’s my most favorite photo and it will amaze you:
http://www.pregnantpause.org/develop/minne.htm
Isn’t that amazing!
Please, let me know how you are. OK? You can even send me an e-mail at the website. OK?
Luv Lisa
Hi there! I’m Lisa and I am from the Stand Up Girl website.
Can I ask you … what does YOUR heart want? Firstly – you are 23 weeks pregnant and I’m sure by now you are ‘feeling’ the movement of your baby. I truly believe that adoption is a wonderful and beautiful choice. There are also different kinds of adoption.
There is ‘opened adoptions’ where you can keep in touch with the family, or some families would allow maybe 1 or 2 visits in the first year … or you can get photos mailed to you to just kind of be kept ‘up to date’ on how wonderfully happy your baby is.
Ultimately – it definitely is up to you and it is your decision. Adoption can be difficult – but at the very same time very freeing and very beautiful!
My Sr. Pastor and his wife adopted 2 babies. They can’t have any babies and I will tell you … these precious little ones are loved to pieces and treated like gold.
Remember – YOU get to select the adoptive parents and YOU get to make the choices.
My dear friend – whatever decision you make … adoption or keeping and parenting your baby – you are a wonderful and loving mommy! Your heart is as warm and safe as any mommy’s heart could ever be. Why? Because you are truly thinking about ‘what is best for my baby’? And you are taking the time and considering 2 very important and loving options.
I would encourage you to pray about it … but don’t be afraid to maybe even venture out. Interview some couples. Don’t feel that you HAVE TO MAKE AN ADOPTION COMITTMENT. You know? You can interview some couples and still … you can decide to keep your baby.
It sounds like your parents are really being a wonderful support. Lean on them. They love you and I know they love their grandbaby too.
OK?
Please feel free to e-mail me at the site any time you like. OK?
I’m here for you.
Luv Lisa
Please just be careful because I do understand that the Amniocentesis is not 100% accurate and you may have a scare when it is not necessary.
You know?
Please please – be cautious and let us know how you are. OK?
Luv Lisa
Hi – my name is Lisa and I am from the Stand Up Girl website and I just felt like I really wanted to respond to your e-mail.
You know its a scary thing when the doctor tells you these things … but please know that these are NOT absolute tests. I have heard (I can’t even count how many) about sooooooooooo many babies that have been born perfectly beautiful and perfectly normal after tests and results that come back negative.
Was it an Amniocentesis? Those kinds of tests are NOT 100% accurate and I understand that they are risky tests.
Please note, I am not a doctor so I can’t give you any medical advice. But I can tell you that from my experience I have heard from countless girls that have had beautifully perfect babies even after bad test results.
OK?
I hope that helps you. Please keep us posted on how you are,
Luv Lisa
Hiiiiiiiiiii – I’m Lisa and I am from the Stand Up Girl website. Ohhhh when I saw your e-mail and the dilemma that you are in, my heart so went out to you … I just had to write to you.
I saw the comment that you made to your ex about it ‘not being the babys’ fault and you are so so so right! You know what abortion does to your heart. Please remember that baby that is inside of you is alive. Living, breathing, moving and more. Did you know that at 6 weeks your baby can suck his/her thumb? Yesssssssss isn’t that amazing.
Can I just share with you that I have been down that road of abortion twice also. Ohhh please know that you have a chance now to give a baby life. I am now not able to have children. Abortion ruined my insides and so I can’t give life ever again. I long for those lost babies and if I could turn back the hands of time and change what I’ve done … I would.
But you have life right in your very hands. Something that so many of us on this site long to have. Please please remember that your baby is a completely whole person – apart from your ex. Your baby does not need your ex to live a satisfactory life. Please don’t abort your beautiful baby just to please someone else. It will just put you into a prison of further torment.
I would love to see you feel at peace about choosing life. I think sometimes we just need someone to support our decision. Someone to say "Girrrl! You can do this!" And I totally believe in you. I think that you can do this. I say this a lot but it’s so true "It’s not always easy being a Stand Up Girl, BUT it’s always worth it!
Please … this is your baby and your baby depends on YOU for his/her very life right now.
One last thing – can I show you an absolutely amazing photo? It is my most favorite and it shows the reality of a baby and how they are so formed at so young. OK?
Check it out:
http://www.pregnantpause.org/develop/minne.htm
Isn’t that amazing!
Please, keep us posted. Let us know how you are.
OK?
Luv Lisa
Hi Kath, I’m Lisa and I am from the Stand Up Girl website.
Can I share something with you? I’m so glad that your life is going so well! Please know that just because you are pregnant does NOT mean that your life will not continue to go well! Pregnancy can actually be a joy. Imagine that there is a little life growing inside of you. At 6 weeks, your baby already is sucking his/her thumb and there is already a measureable heartbeat. Isn’t taht so amazing?
Kath – I know that the initial news is a SHOCK! I imagine that for your partner it will be also. But remember that this little life inside of you is YOUR baby. You know? This can be the blessing in your life that you can never imagine having.
See – a few years ago, I chose differently. I live with that painful memory every day of my life. My heart aches for my lost children and if I could do anything to change what I have done, I would.
But you have so much ahead of you right now. So much joy, love and hope. Please Kath – put your hands onto your tummy right now and realize that the only thing that is separating your hand from your baby is your belly-button (and a little tummy too – hehe).
Can I also share one of my most favorite photos? It’s an amazing photo. Here, check it out and read what it says down the right side of the photo:
http://www.pregnantpause.org/develop/minne.htm
Let me know your thoughts. OK?
Luv Lisa
I can barely contain myself in my chair right now. I’m jumping up and down with excitement. I’m crying big tears of joy right now. haha – the people in my office are going to think I’m crazy!
OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I am so so overjoyed! You have given me reason to be sooooo happy!
Good girl! I am so so so so proud of you!
If you want to – you can keep in contact with me directly at the website too if you want to.
This has been such a wonderful correspondence back and forth. Just remember, I’m always here to talk to you. If you want … you can e-mail me directly at the Stand Up Girl website at:
Then I will get your e-mail right away! Ohhh – I am so happy – you will not regret this. I have a feeling you are already happy about this huh!
😆
Luv Lisa
I totally know that ‘alone’ feeling. But hey girl – you are sooooooo surrounded right here. I know it’s not the same as having friends sitting with you in your living room … but please, let’s just get you through this difficult time at first. OK?
Please don’t choose a drastic measure that you will only regret for the rest of your life. You CAN do this! You totally can! OK?
Let’s just start with this. OK … sit back and get comfy on your chair. Now … are you comfy? OK … take a deeeep breath. Hold it for a second … now let it out slowly. Now … on your next breath let’s say this together "I am going to take a Stand for my baby … I’m going to be a Stand Up Girl!"
You see … it’s only ONE step at a time. You don’t need to have a 5 bedroom house and college tuition right now. All you need is to worry about right now. OK – right now at this very moment — without thinking about way down the road, how do you feel? Knowing that you have a precious little life inside of you. Listen to the quite of the air in your room right now and remember. Remember when you first held your first little baby. What was that like? What was it like when your first baby and your second baby moved in your womb? What was that experience like? Was it exciting? What was it like to feed your baby for the very first time. Do you remember looking down at your babys eyelashes. How your baby breathed when he or she ate? What was that like?
Ohhh -I’m trying to bring back that special memory to let you know … you get to have that again with this beautiful little life that is now inside of you. Please … realize that baby that is inside of you is just as important as the baby that is in the next room.
I know you can do this and we can get you the tools to help you make it. Right now … all you need is time. Time to get settled and to not panic. Once you have made up your mind to let your baby live, then the next step will be a lot easier. Right now … I have a feeling that you know you don’t want to have an abortion … and like me, you are looking for anyone to give you a good excuse why not to.
Let me give you a toll free number and let’s see what we can find for you in the area of help and support. OK?
800-395-HELP (4357)
Look at your little ones now and realize that the love you have for those babies, I think you already have for the one that is inside of you. Don’t you agree?
Please let me know how you are. OK?
I’m keeping my eyes peeled for ya!
Take care.
Luv Lisa xxx
