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I think its a great topic Meg,and I hope more and more will come and share their story.
So that girls who are just finding out that they are pregnant,and searching informations and asking what to do can read here how it is if you decide something,how it reflects to your life forever.Stand up girls,and tell your story.
Ok..well let me start in the begining..I live in a country which what’s to be great,but themes like abortion are something its not talked about,but is happening every day.
Well back in 06..I felt weird..I was pregnant,went to the doc,he didn’t even talked about any option just got me the paper and said where to go for the abortion. My BF said its the right thing to do..Some time after,when I felt that all I wanted to do is die,I foung SUG..I foung that I’m not the only one that has gone through that,that I’m allowed to talk about it,that I’m allowed to feel sad and grieve over my unborn aborted baby..
And with sharing my story,a few girls I know have made the right decision of keeping the baby..SUG helped me to open my heart and talk about what I’ve gone through.. And slowly heal.
I had moments when all I wished was get pregnant and have a baby.. But the girls here helped me ralize that that’s not the way,having a baby at that age would be immature and that a new baby wouldn’t replace the aborted one..
But the wish was still there..
But I knew it shouldn’t be thatway,not yet..
But at one point when I felt really low,I was by a good friend of me,and we had fun,drank abit to much..and I got pregnant. I knew it for the very begining that I am going to keep my baby and try to give him the best life ever..it wasn’t just A baby,I was pregnant with twins,as I found out later,identical twin girls.
Sadly I gave birth to them at 21 weeks gestation and they didn’t make it..And even through that the girls here on SUG helped me,and still are helping me a lot..
Standupgirl in one way didn’t really help me make my decision cause the decision was allready made but it helped me start to talk about what I’m going through,and it made me help a few girls to realize that the abortion isn’t the easy way out..
MonikaHey!
I’m so sorry to hear about your boyfruend..I hate when someone runs away from responsibility.. But hey,you are going to be a mommy,a great one cause you stood up for the lil life inside of you in the very begining,so honey,congrats! I wish you a healthy&easy pregnancy!Thank you all for the replies.. I think..I do get what you aRe saying its just..its hard to deal with this pain. My girls would be 4months old..
Tell me HOW to deal with the pain..of losing your OWN child.. I don’t know how to.
I doubt ill ever know.And yea..wishing something really bad..I know how it is to wish it..in other situations,but like I allready said,its different this time. It never was that way you know,I just can’t explain how..
I guess ill need to learn to live with that wish..and pain..and everything..
Prenatal vitamins are very important! And doc. Appoitments-write down everything you want to ask them,so that it won’t bother even if you forget it when you’ll be there-from all the excitement,belive me;)
Eat healthy-dont change your habbits dramaticly,just make sure you get all the vitamins and minerals by food also..you can drink max a cup of cola/coffe per day..cola may also help you with the morning sickness if you aren’t one of the lucky ones without it.. Don’t push yourself to much in sports..and good luck!Monika
It is hard. Its hard to get all the courage together and call the doctor..for me it was .. I did it just like you,it started ringing and I hang off..I watched the river and asked myself that..I watched the pills and wondered..how it would be like..who would miss me..
Freaking crazy hard.You need to KNOW that you need help,and it takes courage to admit it-to your doc.
This is the very first step of healing.. Feeling atleast a lil bit better..But its hard to say how to get all that courage and strenght together.. Maybe just block your emotions for the minutes you’ll talk with the doc? I don’t even know how the doc system works over there..I know I needed to call my personal doc(who didn’t even knew before that I had an abortion) who sended me then to another doc-consulur(sp?)like one,to who I needed to bring the papers from my gyn. That proved I had an abort,and when,everything (so that my insurance covered him)
I wish you all the best!
If you ever need to talk,just PM me.
Love,monikaHey Deborah!
My name is Monika..I’m 19 and a mom to three angels. I can say from the first hand,having another baby isn’t fulfilling the emptyness that an aborted baby gives to someone.
A little backup,I had an abortion back in 06,I felt empty cause of it and cried about it all the time.I cried eveb through the pregnancy.. And I miss that baby even now. ..I was pregnant with twins,to who I gave birth on Feb 5th.
And still..the emptyness and sadness of the abortion stays.
It does get easier to live with it but my point is,having another baby won’t help you.but talking will.please om me whenever you want,I will try to help you the best I can.
Please,keep in contact,it helps.
Love,
MonikaThat’s a gReat story. The girls can look upon on you,you can and I’m sure for some you allready are a huge motivation.
Congrats for your strenght! And your son can be really proud on his mommy!Well you know,there’s a thing called the HPT..only thisone will tell you what your situation is.
And you may just THINK to much about being pregnant,read to much about it,maybe even wish it?and so making something out of nothing.? Hopefuly.Make a hpt and keep us posted.
Ugh and PLEASE…write in english,not in like I don’t know how,like a kid..many from us aren’t from usa,so its difficult for us to understand when you write like this.
thanks Meg,it means alot…
as for the AIDS thing…i think we are one of the safest countries about that, there are only a few who have it, and there are like almost noone who are infected with HIV/year… the health system here is great…and well thats not really something im worried about.
i wouldnt go in bed with a stranger…i would know him for some time and that but…like i said, i do NOT WANT to do that…i am just seeing how im thinkin about that-its weird how i see that,sometimes i have a feeling that im not in my body but im looking on me from the outside you know? its hard to explain…a totally weird feeling.and murder-there is max. one murdered person/year here.
but i get your point.
how are YOU doing? hows your chubby little girl?
thanks for everything Meg,really…it means alot to me.
hei.
i had an abortion, and i got pregnant again….so mostly, if and when the procedure is made corectly,and if you didnt have any problems after it…than you shouldnt have any big problems with getting pregnant and everything.but if you are worried,just ask your doc, hes paid for answering you so he will.
love,
Monikathank you all for your words…every day became a challenge for me,
as for the God thing…were noton the same line right noe so…if his plan is to hurt people the hardest as possible…then he made a great job.i dont see another..so called “purpose” of taking two babies lifes.
hei Kylie!
I WAS THINKING AND WONDERING ABOUT YOU ALOT.
IM SO LAD YOU CAME BACK, ALL FRESH AND WITH ALOT OF MOTIVATION LIKE I CAN SEE.its really nice to hear that the you made it through the sucking PND,it sux big time.
im sure you are the best mommy in the world 2 your 2 pumpkins.i wish you a nice day
hei.
i know i mean..i see how your situation looks. but hun so really…it is on YOU to decide what you will make… a bit of my story…i had the abortion when iwas 16…i regret it every day…i got pregnant (not planned) again in september 08… i was in school,no real work and single…but you know what? within months everything started settling down, i made my money so i could take care of them, i was doing the school…well sadly i didnt got the chanche to give them all the stuff & love cause they passed away,but i know i would do it great.its in you,i KNOW that if you decide to keep it, you will turn out just fine.there may be some dark moments,but in the end..mommy always has a plan.
aww honey i am so sorry!!
know that your baby loves you… bo matter what she loves you,ok?
she knows that now that you know what the right decision is,you wouldnt make it again, and she knows that you love her. she loves you back.,
light a candle on your window when you feel really bad, and look intoo the sky and talk to her, tell her that you miss her, you will see, that night she will come to you, im sure…and you will feel better. maybe just for a day, a hour, but you will.
if you need someone to listen, to vent, anythhing, id love to be there for you!
i would like to saay…first of congrats on your girls! and on your boy! you are a very strong woman, specially for your age…you are one of the girls for who we can truely say, she stood up!
i belive that it was hard to give your son to your cousin…but on the other side, he will have the life that he deservs, im sure your aunt will give him EVERYTHING she can…and he still is in the family, you will be able to watch him grow up, and he will know (when he will be older) that you made the best choice you could for him!
congrats and good luck!
Hey! Congrats on your pregnancy! Well salted crackers were my best friends! Ate some BEFORE you stand up in the morning..i had ginger tea with lemon by hand the whole day..it helps to suck on lemon cause its bitter.. And you can get some lolypops made for morning sickness! Keep us updated 😀 and it will get better soon!
hey!!
first off breath and dont stress 2 much.
you will sadly have to wait for AF, but there are some tests that can tell earlyer-i think like a week before or so…
well mine gave ne two fat red lines when i was hmm 2 or 1 or even more days before my AF, and i have had a normal one, so…
just wait and when she doesnt come test.
there is a possibility of you being pregnant, but there is also a chance that you are not, so please just donr stress 2 much ok?’
keep us updated,
lots of love (and luck?)
monika
here by us it is kind of a tradition that the family is left on their own for the firs month- i mean with no visits and stuff like that…and i think its pretty cool thatway cause well ok you DO have your baby by you for 9 months now…but you dont have him so really you know…with feeding,changiong…crying…and your boyfriend.
i think the trip wont be a problem cause he wont be even a month old, but i think it would be a problem cause of the emotions…
good luck =)
a lil update =)
babies are here still very active-its sooooo cooooool to feel them, and on the other hand weir cause my friend is 18 weeks and cant feel her boy lol =) (guess im happy ) )=)
well, the babies made 2 weeks since i was in the hospital, they are some little fighters i know that allready, and mommy is feeling great too! ok well…bored as hell but thanks goodness we have internet =)
lots of love,
Monika
