Kit

Nicole,

I don’t think you’re being paranoid. I’m not really familiar with all of the potential side effects of Zoloft or of the effects of missing a few pills of Zoloft. I am not sure why you are having unusual symptoms. If it has been at least two or three weeks since you might have conceived, especially if you have missed your regular expected period, I would take a home pregnancy test. Perhaps your cycle is irregular for other reasons and the symptoms are for other reasons. Either positive or negative, if symptoms persist, perhaps it would be a good idea to see your doctor to get checked out and find out some answers.

Kate

Laura,

It is true that having a baby will change your life and your routine. It is also true that babies cost money. However there are resources out there that can help financially. If you want to have this child don’t let anyone pressure you into an abortion. If your boyfriend truly loves you he will understand and support your decision. Abortion may seem like a quick and easy solution, but it is more complicated. Before you decide to have an abortion please read the stories and posts from girls on this site who have gone through with abortion and have sufferred emotional and physical consequences and have extreme regrets about their choice. If you and your boyfriend do not feel ready for the changes and responsibility of parenthood, perhaps adoption would be the best decision. There is no shame in giving up a child for adoption, and your child would have be given the gift of life.

Kate

Shawna,

Have you had a regular period? Especially if your period is regular (mine wasn’t at all when I was 19) and actually even if your period is irregular, and you are late, I would take a home pregnancy test to find out whether you are pregnant.

Kate

Mandy,

If it has only been a week since you might have conceived, it is probably too early to be experiencing pregnancy symptoms. It is also probably too early to take a pregnancy test. I would wait until your period is due. If you are more than a week late I would take a pregnancy test to find out for sure. I’m glad to hear that if you are pregnant you will keep your baby. Try not to stress too much in the meantime. You could think about ways to approach your parents if the test turns out positive. They will probalby be upset at first, but I bet they will come around and be supportive of you. Good luck.

Kate

Michelle,

If you didn’t take your birth control for a week, then it is possible that you might be pregnant. The symptoms you are describing could be early pregnancy symptoms, but don’t panic yet. You could take a test now, but it is probably better to wait until your period is actually due and you are late. If taken too early a test might register negative when it is really positive if the levels of HCG hormone are too low to register. My advice would be to try not to stress too much (I know easier said than done), and wait and see if your period starts on time. If you are more than a week late I would take a home pregnancy test to find out for sure. Good luck.

Kate

Abby,

If they stopped the contractions I don’t think it necessarily means that you will deliver early in the next week or two. I bet it means that your doctor will want to keep a closer eye on you and the pregnancy in case you go into early labor again. I would follow any advice that he or she gives you. Even at 35 weeks the survival rate is good. My aunt gave birth to my little cousin Maggie about three weeks ago. She was born 6 weeks early and only weighed about four pounds, but she is home from the hospital, has put on weight, and seems to be doing remarkably well for a premie. I hope all goes well for you and your daughter.

Kate

Nya,

I’m not sure how to break the news to your parents. They might be upset at first, but I bet they will come around and be supportive. I would wait until a good opening and opportunity to talk to them, but don’t wait too long or chances are they will feel even more hurt and upset that you didn’t tell them sooner. I understand how scared you feel about telling them and facing them, trust me. However the sooner you get it over with and let them know the sooner you can break free from the worry and dread of telling them. Hang in there, and good luck.

Kate

If you had unprotected sex, even if you withdrew before ejaculation, then there is a chance that your girlfriend could get pregnant (because pre-ejaculation does contain sperm). How did your mother react when she caught you two having sex?!? If your girlfriend has not missed her period yet it is probably too early for her to take a pregnancy test. If she is more than a week late for her period I would definitely have her take a test to find out. It is good to hear that you are worried about her. This must be a stressful time for you both. Either way I’m sure she is afraid and could use your emotional support right now, especially if it turns out that she is pregnant. I hope if she is pregnant you will encourage her to choose life for your child, and be supportive of your girlfriend whether she decides to keep the child or give it up for adoption. I won’t preach, or tell you what to do or what not to do, but in the future if it turns out that she is not pregnant it would probably be good to learn a lesson from this experience. If you are not ready for the prospect of parenthood it would probably be best not to be having sex without birthcontrol. Also the only 100% effective way to not become pregnant is to not have sex. I hope everything turns out well for you both.

Kate

I can relate somewhat to your situation. My heart goes out to you! Let me share a litte bit about my own situation. Hopefully it will help.

The last month has been an extreme emotional roller coaster for me and for my husband. Three weeks ago we went in for a routine prenatal appointment. My ob/gyn gave us the option of whether to do blood tests for defects. We debated, but decided to go ahead with the tests (we were thinking mostly just to reassure ourselves that everything was okay). A few days later I received a call from the doctors office. They said that the blood tests didn’t indicate birth defects, but my hormone levels were high which could indicate a miscalculated due date or a multiple pregnancy. She wanted me to have an ultrasound done ASAP. We were excited but terribly scared at the prospect of twins (or more). The ultrasound showed that we were having only one baby. We left the ultrasound appointment thinking that everything was okay.

The next morning I got a call from my ob/gyn. The ultrasound report sent by the radiologist indicated that it appeared that there might be some abnormal brain development and she wanted me to see a high-risk ob/gyn for more ultrasounds. We were hoping the first scan was a fluke, but the second scan showed problems. The brain ventricles measured 12, 8 would be normal for the stage I was at. The doctor indicated that he thought there was hydrocephalus- fluid building up on the brain. He warned about cranial swelling and warned that there could be risks of miscarriage or premature delivery and there could be the possibility of severe mental damage and low outlook for survival. I felt like my heart had been ripped out. When he asked if we were thinking about terminating the pregnancy I just started sobbing.

My husband and I have decided to accept this pregnancy and to accept our little son no matter what, so abortion was not an option for us. However I can understand the inner turmoil about what life would be like for such a child and how to care for such a child. These are not easy issues to deal with, and this has affected parts of my outlook about the entire pro-life pro-choice debate. The doctor also did an amniocenticis to check for chromosomal abnormalities and said he wanted to do bi-weekly ultrasounds to monitor the pregnancy. He said that not much could be done to improve the situation until after birth, when the child would need surgery for a shunt in his skull to drain fluid.

We went home and prayed and our family and friends prayed..what else could we do? Also did research as to how we would care for a child with disabilities. It seems that God has been listening to our prayers. At the last appointment we found out that the amnio results were normal and the brain ventricles had not grown, but had actually decreased in size. Also it appeared that the brain was growing into the space. He said he still wants to monitor things closely, but things are looking much closer to normal and he feels optimistic. I thought about how it would have been easy for me to have panicked and decided to abort my perfectly healthy baby son. I wonder how many healthy babies were needlessly aborted due to predicted defects. I’m currently at about 21 weeks and we are continuing to hope and pray for the best.

I don’t know about the risks about multiple abortions within a short time period, but there are physical risks to any abortion. Do you know that there are developmental problems with this baby? Also even if the child will be handicapped, consider giving life to the child. I know children with disabilities that are happy and blessings to all around them. Best Wishes.

Kate

Post edited by: Julie, at: 2005/10/11 00:48

Faith,

I’ve never used the birth control patch. From what I’ve read it is about the same effectiveness as regular birth control pills. If used correctly birth control is fairly effective at preventing pregnancy. However, pregnancy is possible even if birth control is used. The only 100% way not to get pregnant is not to have sex. I would guess that you are not pregnant. I can understand how nervous and worried you feel, I can relate from when I had a couple of pregnancy scares several years ago. I would take a pregnancy test to find out for sure. Good luck.

Kate

Courtney,

If your cycle is fairly regular it seems plausible that a doctor could pinpoint conception to within a ten day time frame by calculating from the first day of your last period. The size and development of the baby on the sonogram can also be used to determine and clarify the stage of the pregnancy and the time of conception. If the doctor says you conceived at a time that the child’s father would have been your boyfriend, who is now accepting responsibility and plans to stay with you in raising your child, then I probably would not worry too much. Does Ken know that you have questions about the baby’s father? If you are sure that Ken is the father, then it might be best to just leave the matter alone and not bring it up. However if there is doubt about who the father is a paternity test could be done after the baby is born. If there is a serious chance that your boyfriend might not be the father, he deserves to know.

Pre-ejaculate contains sperm cells. I don’t have statistical figures. I would guess that the chances of pregnancy are less than with ejaculation, based on volume of semen. However pregnancy from sperm in pre-ejaculate can and does happen.

Kate

Carmen,

It is possible that your cycle could just be irregular due to stress or other reasons than pregnancy. Perhaps it would be best to set up an appointment for a doctor to do a blood test to determine if you are pregnant, or to determine why you are having unusual symptoms. Good Luck.

Kate