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I would contact your gynecologist with questions as well as avoid sexual contact as to prevent pregnancy…. Also you can contact optionline.org and they will give you the contact info for the closest Pregnancy Help Center near you where you can get connected with someone who may better know how to explain the whole breakthrough bleeding thing! <3 Meg!
Hey there, Anytime you engage in sexual activity, protected or not you can run the risk of pregnancy….Sure it can help to know your ovulation times but they can also be unpredictable and altered by hormone changes so it is always better to be safe than sorry and avoid sexual contact if you wish to not risk pregnancy…..The best way for you to rule out pregnancy and get peace of mind is to take a pregnancy test….Go ahead and visit, http://optionline.org/ , If you enter your postal code into the site it will give you the contact info for the closest Pregnancy Help Center to you where you can get a FREE and CONFIDENTIAL test! I hope this helps and if you are up for it, come back and let us know what you find out! Much Love….Meg
I am so grateful that my story has helped you confirm your decision to treasure your virginity! What is more appealing to you? A chewed up apple core in the garbage, a display of wax covered apples with stickers on them at the store or going into an orchard and looking for that ONE apple that catches your eye, picking it and enjoying every bite of it? You are that apple on the tree in the orchard, you have not allowed yourself to be consumed with pleasing boys while slowly giving away the deepest parts of your heart and soul, you are not out to fit in with the rest and be like everyone else….You Stand out in the orchard and I think THAT is hot, sexy and oh so pretty <3 In my case my amazing husband looked past the "missing pieces" of my heart and soul and through the Lord I have been restored as well as through the worth my husband placed on me by waiting for me....I feel like that whole crisp apple again but for you, you won't have to know the pain that comes with being chewed up and tossed aside! I am proud of you and knowing that you will avoid the heart ache that I have carried brings me great joy! If you would like to know more of my story go to the Sisterhood drop down box at the top of the homepage and click on My Stand Up Girl Story! You are right about that war but sex is NOT the easy way out, it just appears that way....It has caused anything buy easy circumstances in my life and in my marriage is has just been the incing on the cake, our marriage is so full of good qualities and we built our relationship without sex, it is so possible to fall totally in love, be 100% committed and have zero regrets about who we choose as a spouse without ever having sex....Then on your wedding night, it is the final step in truly becoming united and it is then intended to create an inseparable bond.... Keep up your determination and you will have no regrets so far as sex and relationships go! <3 Meg
Hey there, I am NOT a doctor but I would say you have cause to investigate further….Have you recently started excising more or aggressively? Have you had any major dietary changes? Those can also be factors in a missed or abnormal period….so can stress…..Have you been screened for any sexually transmitted infections? Another possibility is that you could have miscarried with low levels of HCG in your system so you may not show up on a test but you could possibly be retaining the baby, once again, not a doctor here but a possible scenario to be aware of, watch for a fever and if you develop a fever with the rest of these symptoms and especially with severe abdominal pain please be seen IMMEDIATELY….There are women who have had “phantom pregnancies” sometimes the fear of pregnancy or the want of pregnancy can trigger the body to have all the symptoms….For now, my best advice would be to refrain from all sexual contact at least until you know if you are pregnant or not, that way if you are not, you won’t continue to risk pregnancy….I was 5 weeks along with a negative blood test with my first, showed up on a urine test at 7 weeks, she was hung up in my tube but slipped out and with it, caused SEVERE pain and fatigue….Don’t hesitate to demand an ultrasound!….I hope you come back and let me know what you find out! Listen to your body and make sure that your voice is heard by the medical professional who sees you, you have a right to know answers and be provided services that can give them! Love Meg
Hey there, Congratulations on your marriage….The best time to take a urine test is first thing in the morning with your first urine of the day, that is when they are MOST accurate….I am not a doctor but I have a few experiences that you may be relating to, my first pregnancy I was 5 weeks along when I had a NEGATIVE BLOOD TEST….It is not common but also not impossible to be pregnant while getting a negative test, urine or blood….I found out through a positive urine test at 7 weeks and found that my baby had been hung up in my fallopian tube and thankfully she did not implant there but painfully moved down to my uterus, this is what caused my tests to be inaccurate….to know a little more of the details check out My Stand Up Girl Story under the Sisterhood tab, the first few posts go into the story of finding out I was pregnant…..My last pregnancy I was 11 days late before I showed up faintly on a urine test, she was ALSO hung up right between my tube and uterus, had she stayed there and implanted she could have ruptured my uterus…Some women show up bold positive before they are late, and others like myself do not register as quickly….If you have family history of tubal pregnancies and or if the pain in your abdomen increases from a slight cramp to a stabbing pain then I would not only demand a blood test but an ultrasound….Peace of mind is so important so be sure to communicate your needs to your doctor, if they wont meet them, find a new one! A woman knows her body better than ANYONE else out there, ALWAYS trust your gut and seek out a medically provable answer!…I hope you will let us know what you find out! <3 Meg
Hey there, So it sounds like you do have some pregnancy symptoms and you have definitely come to the right place for help! My best advice would be to refrain from any sexual contact at least until you know if you are pregnant or not, that way, if you are not pregnant you wont continue to risk pregnancy while you wait….Then, contact http://optionline.org/ , Enter your postal code into the site and it will give you the contact info for the closest Pregnancy Help Center near you where you can get FREE and CONFIDENTIAL help, including a pregnancy test and an ultrasound if needed….. Have you already talked about this with your partner? Your family? There IS a lot of support out there if you do find out you are pregnant and we are all here for you as well! Just take things ONE step at a time and first step is to find out….I hope that you will come back and let us know what you find out and let us all support you if you find yourself adjusting to a new course in life! Much Love and I hope to hear back from you soon! Meg
ORIGINAL POST TRANSLATED,
hi i just ask if you please
Do positive pregnancy ung my situation I aldo my Bhaby
case because it is not like I’m pregnant Nung first offerlast june I fell upon my visit I normally namn Nung past month n ung always exactly on the date the former UN he just wanted to visit my month of june I july whom finished first with whom I felt I sign Nung tym that I ngbubuntis the first baby I UNG dizzy sleepy DONE I AM LOOKING FOOD
IN SHORT seems conceived IRETABLE DONE ME
Naung month of august whom Isaid my friend also of my Is that allegedly claimed the incident cia Is that because Nung pregnant
PA ADVICE nalang PO TNX
RESPONSE FROM MEG TRANSLATED,
Hi there, I use a translation website to try to find out where you are from and what you’re asking. I only speak English. Seem to think you are pregnant. Here is my best advice. I am going to give you a list of places you can go to the Philippines for FREE help. I do not know where you live and it’s not safe to give that information out to the public but I hope one of these places are close by you. If you go to Google Translate then you can translate your message in English and I can better assist you. Until then, here is a list of places where you can get help. I care about you and if you are pregnant, I appreciate about your baby too, I hope you can get some help from someone close by and remember that even when God lets you to have a baby in your womb, He will provide for you, Love MegKumusta doon, ako ay gumamit ng isang pagsasalin website upang subukan upang malaman kung saan ikaw ay mula sa at kung ano ang iyong hinihingi. Lamang ako nagsasalita ng Ingles. Mukhang sa tingin mo ikaw ay buntis. Narito ang aking pinakamahusay na payo. Ako ay pagpunta upang bigyan ka ng isang listahan ng mga lugar na maaari kang pumunta sa Pilipinas para sa LIBRE tulong. Hindi ko alam kung saan ka nakatira at hindi ito ligtas upang bigyan na impormasyon out sa publiko ngunit Umaasa ako na ang isa sa mga lugar na ito ay malapit sa pamamagitan ng sa iyo. Kung pumunta ka sa Google Translate pagkatapos ay maaari mong isalin ang iyong mga mensahe sa wikang Ingles at maaari ba akong mas mahusay na tulungan ka. Hanggang pagkatapos, dito ay isang listahan ng mga lugar kung saan maaari kang makakuha ng tulong. Pakialam ko tungkol sa iyo at kung ikaw ay buntis, pinapahalagahan ko ang tungkol sa iyong sanggol masyadong, Umaasa ako na maaari kang makakuha ng ilang tulong mula sa isang tao sa pamamagitan ng malapit at tandaan na kahit kailan ang Diyos ay nagbibigay-daan sa iyo upang magkaroon ng isang sanggol sa iyong sinapupunan, Siya ay nagbibigay ng para sa iyo, Pag-ibig Meg
Pilipinas Ang isang Home para sa mga anghel 2306 Coral Corner Agosto Francisco St San Andres Bukid, Manila (632) 562-8085
Pilipinas Abiertas House of Friendship 21 Santolan Rd Quezon City 632-724-3969
Pilipinas Adoptive Families Foundation 102 Gamboa St, Legaspi Village Makati City 840-1771
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Pilipinas Little Bethlehem Birthing Home Beteranong ni St, Barangay 16 Gingoog City 088-427-410
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Pilipinas PCS – Clotilde Medical Supply 1516 Rizal Ave, Sta. Cruz Manila 743-1079
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Pilipinas PCS-Care & Ibahagi Center 14 B Manahattan St, Cubao Manila 727-1189
Pilipinas PCS San Juan de Dios hospitaler R Hidalgo St, Quiapo Manila 735-9718
Pilipinas Pope John Paul II NFP at Pagbubuntis Resource 2nd FL, LayCenter ng Bituin Center, San Carlos pastoral ng Bituin Makati City Complex 632-896-0584
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Pilipinas St Gerard Family Life Center Redemptorist Church, Baclaran Paranaque 832-1150
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Pilipinas San Juan ng Krus Center Pamilya at Buhay # 9 Jasmin St, Pembo Makati City 632-728-7316
Pilipinas Tahananang Pagmamahal Bata Home 146 StInc. Francis St, Brgy Oranbo Pasig City 632-393-2204
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God bless you too! Hind sight is 20/20, you didn’t know what this decision would do to you and although I would never recommend that someone makes that choice, for you it is too late, you did and you hurt, there is help and healing and who are we to ignore your hurt and turn you away….We need to stick together and support each other with love, maybe you will get that same opportunity some day, maybe you will get to help another girl before it is too late for her, you have a powerful, yet painful, gift to offer….the experience and warning to offer other women….Have you been able to find a local post abortive healing group yet and is that something you are interested in? Much Love! <3 Meg
I am glad to hear that you two have began a healing process…things may never go back to the same but maybe there will be a NEW start….I do believe in forgiveness and healing and I have had some good relationships turn bad and once healing took place the friendship was BETTER, it was never the same but over time it was something that could have never been without the temporary conflict….I hope that will be true for you two….Maybe your forgiveness and grace toward her will teach her something and rub off on her…. <3 Much Love and THANK YOU for coming back and letting us know how things are going! Meg
I feel ya….You should go read my blog, its under My StandUpGirl Story, I TOTALLY get it, it CAN be scary and uncertain but I promise you, no matter how scary it is or how unprepared you may feel, NOTHING compares to the victory of making it through STRONGER and having the love of your very own child and holding your baby! Is how we get here always ideal? Nope, sometimes it is the “worst timing” but our babies didn’t ask to be here so the least we can do is protect them, love them and make a better life for ourselves on their behalf!…..You seem pretty strong already and determined….There is nothing wrong with getting started early, you will have the energy to run and play with your kiddo (if you are pregnant) and still be young enough to enjoy the busy years without being so worn out! One benefit to getting started “accidentally early” as I like to put it!…..Keep that smart head on your shoulders and you can get through anything! I WILL be praying for you and I am glad you will keep me updated! Feel free to email me if you need to! Love Meg, meg@standupgirl.com
Hey there….China seems to be very limited in the FREE pregnancy help category….I searched and found nothing! Anyways…One tip that may help is to make sure when you test that it is your first urine of the day, that is when the HCG hormone in pregnancy is most concentrated and most easily detected….I am sorry for your previous loss and I hope that if you are pregnant that you will be able to carry to term and hold your sweet baby….I hope you will come back and let us know what you find out! I will be waiting with crossed fingers for you! Love Meg
Hey Gabby!! I remember you too….it is GREAT to have you back….especially now as an experienced mom…I look forward to seeing the great advice you have to share with others…I am so proud of the amazing woman you have become :)…see ya around! Love Meg!
Hey there…I am SO sorry for your loss and all the pain that comes along with it…I feel really bad that your friend turned on your at the most vulnerable time in your life….I wen through something similar a few years ago but I was the married friend who was pregnant (although I had been a single mom to two kids for 4 1/2 years before I met and married my husband) and my friend is the one who had the abortion….She had been making prolife videos and reaching out to other girls who were experiencing crisis pregnancy as she had been through two herself…She even visited this website and offered incredible advice to others….Yet her fear took over when she faced her third unplanned pregnancy and she chose to abort….The difference in my story is that I have NEVER turned her away….I hurt deeply for her and the many consequences she still faces….The decision you made it a painful one and the suffering you live with is not a light load to bear….Not everyone is like your old friend…There are MANY wonderful resources out there geared toward healing after an abortion, there are many wonderful women just like you who just didn’t know what to do and there are many wonderful people out there willing to stretch our arms out to you and Stand with you and say, we love you just the same….I will admit, when my friend sent me baby clothes after my daughter was born (we were literally due like 2 days apart) it was difficult for me to put them on my daughter, as one of her reasons to abort was that she could not afford baby clothes….I felt like I was robbing from her child, clothing that he/she could have worn…it hurt me because I wanted so badly for her to be spared from the pain she was in and I wanted so badly for her baby to have the chance to wear that cute outfit….I am not sure if that is a similar feeling your friend has or not but it takes a mature person to let those things rest and be a support to a hurting friend….If you visit this website, http://optionline.org/ , Enter your postal code into the site and it will give you the contact info for the closest Pregnancy Help Center to you where you can get FREE and CONFIDENTIAL post abortive counseling….I actually went to my local center and took the counseling course just so I would know what it is like to share with women in your shoes….I went through the study thinking of my friends baby and my 4 nieces/nephews that have been lost to abortion….It was a beautiful group of women, they opened up, shared and healed from so much and I was full of love and support for each of them….You CAN and WILL find that same support if you are willing to reach out and let others in to carry this burden with you! I hope my words have helped settle your heart on this matter just a little, you are wanted and welcome here at Standupgirl, Feel free to write your story in a blog as a way to get it out and heal or scroll through and read other girls stories and find that you are not alone….I am here as well if you ever just need a friend to understand….I have been a friend to MANY post abortive women and my heart has room for more! Much Love and Prayers for your heart to heal <3 Meg meg@standupgirl.com
Hey there, My name is Meg….The way you posted seems like you are more making a statement rather than seeking counsel….It seems as though you have made up your mind….but have you? There are a few words that still speak through the lines…it seems that you are going against things that you have previously sworn against….To me that is a red flag that you may not be sold on your decision….I just want to throw a few things out there and you can choose to investigate further or not…I am not here to pressure you…clearly you have enough of that going on in your own thoughts!
I found out I was pregnant when I was 19, I had JUST finished high school and it was the time in my life when it was supposed to be about ME…I felt trapped and like I had to give my freedom up…You can actually read more of my story here on the site under My Stand Up Story Blog, Anyways, all that to say, I TOTALLY get where you are at…Isn’t it crazy how we will have sex with someone we don’t love and not realize it till a consequence hits us? I was the same way….
You mentioned that reading about abortion made you feel terrible….If just reading a few lines about abortion makes you feel terrible, have you evaluated how you may feel during the abortion, after the abortion and when the many common side effects such as depression and nightmares and inability to be around other peoples babies hits you? I have a friend who collapsed in the diaper aisle in tears, she was buying diapers for a baby shower for a friend and it hit her that she could afford to buy diapers for someone elses baby but was too scared to give birth to her own out of fear that she could not afford diapers…Many times the emotional risks of abortion are passed over due to time constraint and the need to hurry up and be done with the crisis….I am not asking you to change your mind, I am just asking you to do more research before you make the final irreversible step…
You said your baby is just cells right now, may I ask how far along you are? You baby’s heart started beating 18 days after he/she began to develop…this is a scientific medical fact, Here is a link to a site that goes over the details of the developing baby from week one through 40, http://www.pregnancy.org/fetaldevelopment/weeks-1-4 , Depending on how far along you are will depend on what type of surgical procedure done, if you are too far along to take the pill then most likely you will have a D and C, they will dilate your cervix using either metal rods or an expanding seaweed, both are known to cause physical damage to the cervix, increasing the risk for premature birth in future pregnancies, then they use a series of instruments to dismember and remove your baby, followed by scraping the inside of your uterus with a sharp razor type tool….Honestly, I would be scared too….There have been more and more 911 calls coming from abortion clinics, there have been more and more clinics shut down due to poor sanitary conditions and there have been more and more reports of abortion providers operating illegally without licenses due to suspended licenses in other states…Google the name LeRoy Carhart, He is still open and operating his abortion business even though he has KILLED two women, they died directly as a result of the botched abortion he proved them…
Do your research, ask questions, What is the name of the surgeon performing my abortion? May I see a copy of his license and confirm it with the HEALTH DEPARTMENT? Have any women been injured under his care? Find out if there have been any 911 calls made from the clinic you are going to…. Here is a link to a copy of your rights, it IS important to know this when obtaining an abortion, http://www.acenterforwomen.org/Abortion_Patient_Rights.html
Finally, if you DO decide that you do not want an abortion there is TONS of help out there… You have rights and this website can help you utilize them, http://pregnantoncampus.studentsforlife.org/ , Your university staff cannot hold prenatal appointments against you on your grades, they HAVE to accommodate you during your pregnancy by LAW…. There are pregnancy help centers, if you look to the right of this paragraph in the side bar you will find a link to Optionline, they can connect you with the closest center to you where you can get FREE and CONFIDENTIAL help…If nothing else, you can compromise, Would you consider making a small sacrifice and carrying this child to term and then allow someone else to raise him/her? You can STILL go far in your dreams, you can travel and be carefree but you can know that you did not pose physical risk to your body or to your child…..
In closing, here is a video, there is nothing bloody or graphic, it is simply an interview with three women, they all worked for an abortion clinic and they share why they no longer do, it might give you a new perspective of what happens behind closed doors! Their stories are not rare, they happen every day….Only you can make this decision, I just believe you need to be WELL informed of the risks involved…Legally it is your choice, I think you care about yourself too much, and you should, to make the decision without investigating further…You are too smart for that! I am here for you and you are welcome to email me if you need more info or if you just want to talk…Love Meg meg@standupgirl.com
Hey there, Sadly, no matter how careful you are, ANYTIME you engage in sexual activity where sperm can enter your body, you run the risk of pregnancy….It only takes ONE sperm….Anyways, what I recommend is this, Go ahead and refrain from having sex at least until you know if you are pregnant or not, that way if you are not, you don’t continue to risk it while you wait to find out…Visit this website, http://optionline.org/ , Enter your postal code into the site and it will give you the contact info to the closest Pregnancy Help Center near you where you can get FREE and CONFIDENTIAL help, including a pregnancy test! No matter what, you are not alone and you have help….Lets just take this one step at a time….First step, Take the test and find out if you even need to figure out a next step!….Keep in touch…Love Meg
Hey Mae, My name is Meg….Well you have some options here, you do not have to tell your mom right away, you can go to this site, http://optionline.org/ , enter your postal code into their system and it will give you the contact info for the closest Pregnancy Help Center near you where you can get FREE and CONFIDENTIAL help including a pregnancy test and an ultrasound if needed…..If it turns out that you ARE pregnant, they can help you figure out your due date and even help you break the news if you want the support in doing that….They can discuss all of your options as well as supply you with a list of local resources in your area that specialize in helping those facing unplanned pregnancy…..It may be scary but taking that first step and FINDING OUT is important….You may be stressed out and panicked for no reason and find that you are not pregnant, or you may find out that you are pregnant and have some big decisions to make….I am here for you as well as the rest of the Standupgirl community, no matter what you are facing you do not have to face it alone….The best thing to do is get it over with and just take the test, that way the what ifs and guess work are out of the way…..I have had pregnancy scares that turned out to be nothing and I have also experienced unplanned pregnancy twice…I have been there and I know what you are going through….I can’t promise it will be easy, but I can promise it will be ok….Just one step at a time and our first step is taking that test….Please do so and let me know what you find out and we can figure out our next step…ok! I am so glad you found Standupgirl.com and I hope to keep in touch! Love Meg, meg@standupgirl.com
Hey there, I am not a doctor and there are SO many types of pills and various symptoms that can go along with each one so I really can’t tell you what is going on….What I CAN do though is help you find someone who can! What I would do in your shoes is to stop having sex at least until you know if you are pregnant or not, that way you do not risk pregnancy while you wait to figure this all out….make sense? Alright, now visit this website, http://optionline.org/ , Enter your postal code into the site and it will give you the contact info for the center nearest you where you can get a FREE and CONFIDENTIAL pregnancy test and possibly an ultrasound….they can better help you find local resources or help you find a good doctor to go see….I hope you are able to make it in and find answers soon! Please come back and let me know what you find out! Love Meg
Hey there! I think you would benefit from having a medical grade test to confirm your pregnancy….Visit this website, http://optionline.org/ , Enter your postal code into the site and it will give you the contact info for the closest Pregnancy Help Center near you where you can get a FREE and CONFIDENTIAL test to confirm whether or not you are pregnant, you can also have an ultrasound done there at no cost….Tests and hormones can be so confusing, especially when pregnancy symptoms are so similar to period symptoms….The best thing to do is go see someone at the Pregnancy Help Center, they do this every day and will be able to help you no matter what! I hope you will come back and let us all know what you find out! Just take some deep breaths and try to stay calm, stress and worry can delay your period as well and produce even more pregnancy symptoms!….I am here if you need to talk, I have had pregnancy scares that turned out false and I have also seen that plus sign appear and had my world rocked! Let me know if I can help you in any way! Love Meg, meg@standupgirl.com
So may I also ask if either of your families have encouraged you to chose abstinence until marriage as a spiritual decision? I ask because I see many people whos teens end up pregnant and they are not so shocked as they KNEW they were having sex, where as families who expect their teens to abstain are often blind sided by pregnancy as they have no idea they are having sex….it should be something you consider in this decision, if you end up pregnant before you graduate will it affect your plans for the fall? Will it jeopardize your place to live? I was 19 when I got pregnant with my first, I was not trying to get pregnant but I was also putting myself at high risk without really weighing the consequences of my future children….I was not in a good position to care for a child, much less on my own….Until you have a ring on your finger and a legal binding document declaring marriage there is no guarantee that you would not be taking care of a child on your own….words can only be proven by action and many times in the moment of unexpected pregnancy a man who is not committed on paper will often panic…many times he will come back once the baby is born but in my case neither of them did….This is a decision that cannot be unmade….I would encourage you and your bf to talk about these things in detail, what is your plan if you get pregnant sooner than two years from now? Do you plan on going to college, will you still be in that mindset if you get pregnant? Does he plan on going to school or working or both? You are of legal age to get married…is that an option on the table for this summer? You know that old song, first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes the baby in the baby carriage? Why not try it out! You have nothing to lose that way! I think it is great when people get married young and start families early, they still have TONS of energy to run and play with their kids, it is actually a much better time for the female body to carry a baby….but having that solid legal commitment really does help the stability of the relationship and it has been proven in statistics that kids with two married parents often do better in school! There is less strain on the homelife….Just some food for thought! Love Meg
So may I ask how old you are? Are you in high school, college? I ask because if you are a minor living in your parents home then it would be wise to know where they stand on this issue….Anytime you engage in sexual contact you risk pregnancy, has your family ever discussed their stance on you becoming pregnant before marriage? Is his family aware of you two wanting to start a family? It is ideal when a child has extended family and you need to be sure that you will have support….married or unmarried, in or out of school, rich or poor family support is so needed….I have been around this site for a while and I have seen over and over again that the girls on here who have support are the ones who overcome obstacles best….I would just be sure to make sure you have your families support, both of you, before you make decisions that cannot be unmade….All I can do is offer advice based on the hard lessons I have learned, you have to make the decisions on your own, but you also have to bear the consequences just like I do….I always say this, Experience is the best teacher….if you can afford the tuition….I have the experience and I paid COSTLY for it, I have “books” for you to borrow, free of charge, you can go out and pay for your own but I can save you time, cost and much regret by sharing mine with you!…I hope you make the decision with the least regrets and least amount of consequences! Love Meg
Losing my virginity was NOT what I thought it would be….for some girls it will hurt and they can also bleed, for me it was not physically painful though…..What hurt most was being dumped 20 minutes later….All I did was try to hold his hand and he told me I was being too clingy and that he needed space….I literally felt like I was a disposable kleenex used to give him a moment of pleasure and then be tossed in the trash…..They say that you never forget your first and that has been painfully true for me, I know many other girls with similar stories and I know many girls with stories about how it was a good experience and it made them feel closer to their bf but the same end still came around…break up….what happens is that it is easier to get in bed with someone when you are no longer a virgin, you feel like there is nothing holding you back, like the grand opening of a business, the ribbon has been cut and there is nothing new and exciting, that is how I felt and sadly I made the choice to repeatedly give myself away just hoping that “this time would be it” the time where I would feel good and loved and wanted…..Fast forward 10 years, I had one child and was pregnant with my second from a second father, I was so hurt and I felt so used up and ruined….I made the choice to not have sex again until my wedding night…if anyone would ever want to marry me….that day finally came 2 1/2 years later, I made it….the very first time I had sex with my husband was right after he took my wedding dress off and I can tell you from both sides of life that is wish that THAT would have been my first time ever….I wish that my incredible wedding night would be the first memory of sex, I wish that I didn’t have to compare the two nights in my mind….I wish I didn’t have the memory of not being good enough, it really does stick with you for the rest of your life…..My husband is a respectable man and even if I had said yes, he would have said NO….He didn’t want to be the next on my list of people that hurt me or used me….He treated me like I had value and worth….I didn’t see it at the time and still struggle with it at times but just because I was no longer a virgin did NOT mean that I lost my worth as a woman, but by making that decision when I did and with who I did, I set myself up for years of believing that I was ruined so who was I to be picky and say no?….I hope that this sheds a little perspective for you, there really is NOTHING to lost by waiting….You will not risk std’s, you won’t risk the heartbreak of feeling used and you won’t have to wonder what it feels like to feel like you have lost your worth like I did….Now when I mention worth in the same sentence as virgin please don’t confuse this, I do not view a woman who is raped or abused as a virgin as no longer being pure or as losing worth…those are terrible things to go through, I view virginity and purity in the areas of choice….when you choose to give yourself away freely you can never get that part back, and you take a part with you, by the time I got married I was literally like a combination of all the worst parts of the people that used me and I had given all of my best parts away….through time and healing and being loved in a real way by a man who respected my body I have learned to find that worth again and I have gotten rid of those bad parts and found my good ones again! Just be SO careful about this decision…it is one that you CANNOT take back! You can always make it later but you cannot reverse it once it has been made! I say wait, save yourself for the person who will say NO even if you say yes! He is worth it, I promise! <3 Meg
Hey you….I know what you are battling through, I have been there….I had two kids from two dads by the time I was 22….I know it seems so scary now but if your biggest concern is financial then I KNOW there is TONS of help out there at your finger tips and you CAN do this! Please contact your local Pregnancy Help Center, http://optionline.org/ , Enter your postal code into the site and it will give you the contact info for the closest center to you!…..Your local center will have a list of all the local resources available to you, things like medical, food, housing, utility, educational and clothing needs….In todays world there is a ministry or government funded program for just about every need we have as moms! You state that you have always been against abortion….Whatever those reasons are, they still apply, they should apply even more so when it is YOUR child and YOUR body on the line….Please don’t rob yourself of the joy you already know from your children and do NOT place yourself at risk of the emotional and physical issues related to abortion…you deserve much better than what abortion has to offer….I am here if you need me, meg@standupgirl.com , Please let me know if I can help you find specific resources in your area or if you just need a friend! Much love and please consider allowing your baby to live…I know you have what it takes to embrace this path…You are a mother of three already….Just give this little one a chance to make it to your arms <3 Love Meg
Well congratulations on your sneaky little one! I will be keeping you in my prayers as you lay low, I know the stress and worry is strong but don’t allow yourself to be robbed of this special time, whether you are blessed to bring this baby to term or whether you have a short time, just relish the moment and feel that sweet connection with your little one! I am glad the doctors are taking good care of you and addressing your concerns! Thanks for the update and keep us all informed on how you are! Love Meg
Hey there, I can see why you would be so confused….I am as well! I am no doctor but I have a couple of theories….First, I am SO sorry for your loss a couple years back, what a surprise to find out about your baby only to end up saying goodbye too soon….Clearly something went wrong in your pregnancy, this could be why your baby seemed to only be measuring 5 weeks along after 3 months of no period, it could be that something went way wrong, leading to very slow development and eventually your painful loss….Some women do not show up on tests very early, I even had a negative blood test at 5 weeks along with my first baby, I showed up negative on tests with all of my kids for several weeks….Like I said, I am not a doctor but from personal experience and gleaning from other shared stories I believe it has to do with hormone levels….I am SO glad you have a check up this week and I am hoping and praying for you that all is well this time around, Have you ever given birth to a full term child or is the pregnancy two years ago your first dealings with pregnancy? Be sure to tell your doctor about your past experience and any concerns you have, be pushy for answers if you need to be, they are used to it, don’t let them sweep your needs under the rug….I really hope that you will come back and let us all know what you find out, I am praying for you and hoping that your little one will stay put and remain healthy…Much love and talk soon! Meg
