Today, in the present day, I am faced with the chance of pregnancy again. Once again, to a one night (or four day) stand. We met through my old blog (since deleted) and began emailing back and forth. Not small emails either, lengthy ones that are worthy of being parts of book chapters. We were interested in each other.
Three weeks go by and he tells me that he’s broken up with the girl he was seeing. Well, that was a shock. I didn’t know there was a girl in the first place. I just ruined a relationship, maybe for good. Two days later and he invites me to his house to meet him. I was working seven days a week at that point so I put it off another week, just until my contract ended.
We kept emailing. We added each other on Facebook. We kept talking, more and more frequently. I set a date that I was going to meet him.
I arrived at his house and I didn’t know what to expect. I was in a city that I didn’t know well, about to meet a man who I had met from my blog. This was not your average situation. Still, it felt as natural as breathing. We didn’t rush anything the first couple of hours that I was there…even though we wanted to. It wasn’t until later that night, once we were truly comfortable and I had met everyone else in the house, that we began to pick things up. They were really good. It felt natural. Like a piece of the puzzle was being completed. There was this fire and spark between us that sizzled. I could feel it between us.
That was Wednesday night. I stayed there until late Saturday morning. We didn’t use condoms. He asked me if I was on the pill or injection and I said yes.
I lied.
I’m 100% not. I don’t know what possessed me to say yes. I feel bad for lying to him now but in the moment, I didn’t think anything of it. What were the chances anyway?
Well, that’s what I thought until I started counting back the days. It had been exactly two weeks after my period had finished and I was technically in the “fertile period” of my cycle. Whoops. I lied. Double whoops. I never corrected myself. Triple whoops.
I could say “whoops” all I want but it doesn’t change the fact that it happened. Maybe a little part of me even wants to be pregnant, I don’t know. As I wrote that out, I felt something click. I think I’m right. Not a little part, a big, big part of me wants a child. A big, big part of me is also very scared.
It has been fifteen days since I left his house. I am writing this on 23rd February 2014. I know it’s too early for anything but I keep thinking “what if” and that what if has me excited. Immature, I know.
I guess I should let y’all know about the lad situation too.
He’s 26 and from Argentina. I’m nineteen and a resident (by birth) of New Zealand. Although I felt comfortable and like something “clicked” when I was there, there was also something slightly off. I felt like little more than a best friend. He was (and is) a great person. I respect him…but I don’t think I could date him. Not now, anyway. He thinks the same thing. We’re “friends” but I have a feeling we won’t be speaking as much now.
As twisted as it is, despite the circumstances, a small part of me still wishes that I am pregnant. How messed up is that?
When I was 14, my boyfriend and I decided we should start a family (he was 17), well.. What were we thinking!? Anyways, about 3 months after trying to conceive, I got pregnant! But I was definitely in denial! I missed my period each month and just made myself think nothing of it, then the baby started to move and kick and it started to feel real.
I told the father and he was scared and didn’t know what to do. Yes we were trying for a baby, but man when it happened we had no clue what to do! I came on this site a lot and talked to the team at StandUpGirl.com, Teka in particular. I emailed back and forth with her and she helped me through a lot. This site is amazing and I couldn’t thank them for everything they do!
Time went on and I still didn’t have any prenatal care (no vitamins, doctor, etc..). I hid my pregnancy for 7 months! One night, I couldn’t take is anymore and I went out crying to my mom and made her guess why I was crying. She guessed on about the 4th guess. She was very upset and disappointed, and very shocked when I told her how far along I was. She sat down the next few weeks with my boyfriend (the father) and I, and talked to us about our options and we all agreed that it just wasn’t right to get an abortion this late in pregnancy (obviously I wanted to keep my baby as well!). She made a doctor appointment the next day and from there we got an ultrasound. My first/only ultrasound was when I was 28 weeks and found out we were having a little boy!
Everything went well with my pregnancy until about the 38th week when my OB noticed my blood pressure was very high. He told me to go home and not to go back to school. He had me go in the next day and also told me if it didn’t go down I would be induced and be having my son! Well, sure enough we went in the next day and my blood pressure was even higher! I was sent straight to the hospital and was induced! I only had a 4 hour labour and met my handsome son, Dallas James, at 4:15pm on November 9th. He was 7lbs 10oz and 19.3 inches long (:
Well! Now I am 17. The father will be 21 in March and Dallas is just over 2 years old and we are expecting baby #2! Yes, I am still in school and will be graduating in June! This pregnancy was planned as well and my mother knew and is very supportive. I am due in July and will find out the gender later in February! Then, I go into college this September as well! My mom offered for all of us to move in at her house so we took the offer. It will make everything so much easier when the baby comes. I love my growing family so much and couldn’t ask for anything more. I have been with my boyfriend for over 3 years and everything is going great with the pregnancy so far as we can tell.
It doesn’t matter what obstacle hits you in life, all you need is determination and you can get through anything!
Well, I was 16 and was loving life. I wasn’t the best behaved teenager. I had messed around in school and was left with nothing so was looking to get a job to sort my life out. But what happened next changed me, changed my life and my future –
Well, it was a Friday night and me and all my mates were heading out to the park to get drunk. Whilst out, I met some guys that I never before had met. Them, me, and my friend went back to the lads’ house. While she was with one, I got to know the other. This ended up with me in his bed with no protection. The next morning, we literally ran off to say the least. I just thought that was that. I would never see or speak to him again. How wrong was I!
A few weeks later, I realized I hadn’t come on my period, but thought nothing of it. Two more weeks passed and that’s when me and my mates went to Central Youth Center and I took a pregnancy test. Positive!!!
I am 17 and just found out at my gynecologist office, just there to pick up a refill of my birth control, on January 15 that I am pregnant with my almost 20 year old boyfriend’s baby. We have not told our families for different reasons.
We have not told his family, because his mom would be very mad due to the fact that my boyfriend just lost his job a few months ago and is living with her, his dad, and little brother again in a two bedroom house (yes…crowded especially considering I am there literally every weekend and weeks when I’m out of school). I wouldn’t blame her though because neither of us still have our jobs right now and neither of our families could financially support our baby even if they wanted to. Which is why I was so confused and going over adoption and abortion in my head so many times, but my boyfriend said that we can do this. He’s stepping up to be a dad, and that if I get an abortion we are over with.
I understand his frustration and I couldn’t do an abortion even if I tried…I do love my baby. It’s just hard to think that of all times NOW would be the time my birth control expires out of the 3 years I’ve been on it and got me pregnant.
My last day of school is January 23 so I’ll be out of school thanks to early graduation. But now I won’t be able to attend my college of choice, because I wouldn’t want to be away from my baby and my boyfriend would be at work. I’m still going, but will do online college for the first few years which was never a thought to me, especially with all my acceptance letters coming in the mail now.
I’ll be barely 18 when I have my baby in August and my birthday is in early May…I think (I’m still trying to get my gyno to call me back and tell me how far along I am from my blood work, but I’m guessing I’m 9 weeks as of tomorrow.) Anyway we aren’t telling my mother because the sad fearful truth is that she will try to kill and/or harm me and my unborn child. She’s always been physically and mentally abusive to me. She’s attacked me, beat me, cut my hair off knowing it was the only thing I loved about myself, called the cops and lied to them to try to get me in trouble, she’s kicked me out on the street with NOTHING (no cell phone, clothes, toothbrush) and constantly felt the need to steal hundreds of dollars from me, wish death and harm upon me, and even almost kept me from graduating High School and going to college just because “she doesn’t like me”.
She’s never really taken care of me and I pretty much take care of myself and do what I want because she doesn’t care about me. My mom, little brother, and I are living with my grandma in a three-bedroom house right now and my mom’s income is literally ZERO. She has no job, no money, and an abusive husband (my stepdad) who doesn’t do anything for us. She’s hurt me so much to the point I want nothing to do with her and don’t even want her to be a part of my child’s life, not only because she doesn’t deserve it, but also because she has admittedly said she would harm her grandchildren and didn’t want to take care of them while they were young and couldn’t feed themselves. She is a terrible person and doesn’t even deserve to know.
I wouldn’t even want to tell her if I didn’t need to use my insurance card for prenatal care and I’m sure she’d realize it when she saw it on her insurance…right? (Btw I’ve already started prenatal pills I’ve gotten at Walmart so I’m doing what I can for now.) We don’t want to tell her until I am in a safe position and place so she can’t harm me and my baby.
Oh yeah and the big shocker is…none of my family even knows about my boyfriend AT ALL. They have no idea I have a boyfriend even. That’s how un-involved they are in my life.
They don’t know I spend every weekend with my boyfriend and his family. So not only will it be a big shocker to know I have a boyfriend, but I’m also pregnant even though I felt (and still feel) it is none of their business.
My family have all hurt me and made sure I felt unwanted. My boyfriend and I decided not to allow them in our children’s lives for now which hurts me because they will be very close to his family and wonder why not mommy’s family, but if you knew my family you’d understand it’s for selfless safety reasons.
Anyway that’s a glimpse into my story and any advice, courage, or opinions are welcome as long as you’re polite and respect me and my boyfriend.
Thank you for reading it all if you did!!
When you do take the home pregnancy test, it doesn’t quite seem real. But when you see the baby and the heartbeat on the ultrasound, it’s so incredible!
It just hit me that I am going to be a mother. I have been feeling like I am getting very connected with my son now. He is totally going to be a soccer player. I am glad I get to have this experience and it is amazing.
I have been going through a lot of stuff with the father of my baby. He has not been a part of it. Once he found out, he decided to accuse me of cheating. He thought that it is going to get him out of being a dad. How I see it is he will be a dad no matter what. Just because he is not a part of our baby’s life does not mean it will not come back and bite him in the butt. and it will!!
I feel like I should just be patient with him, but another part of me is feeling that I should be preparing myself for raising my son by myself. I hope I won’t have to, but I probably will start to get that mindset of I am a single mom and I know I will be a lot more protective of my son after he is born.
I am really not prepared to be a mother, but I’ve heard that it will come to me. So I hope I am one of the lucky ones and I turn out to be a natural mother. Well, I hope so. I have a feeling everything is going to turn out okay.
I found out I was pregnant during Spirit Sports Northeast Knockout in January.
It was day 1 of the competition and we were at warm ups and I felt sick. I’ve been cheering since I was 3 and I always felt sick during competition because the nerves were getting to me. But this time it was different. We were competing for a bid and practice hasn’t been that good. I’ve been throwing up, I’ve been having mood swings, I was hoping it would be my period.
