I was a party animal. Went out 3-4 times a week wasn’t much of a drinker but I loved to have a good time. One Saturday I went out with my girlfriends we were having a blast and we went outside for a smoke when this guy beside me tells this other guy that I look like some girl he knows, so I turn around and the other guys like “Yeah my cousin thinks you look like one of his friends” and we just started chatting and we were teasing the guy (the guy who said I looked like his friend) calling him Massari cause he really looked like him but he was super shy and always running away. So we leave it at that I go back in the club and I bump into him moments later. I look at him and I’m like “what’s your name?” He’s like “Ranim”, he asked me for mine and I gave it to him. My friends were calling me so I told him I’d see him later. But we ended up leaving the club to go to another.
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I just felt I needed to share my story. I was 18 and it was the end of march or beginning of april when I found out I was pregnant. My boyfriend and I (now fiance) were very confused on what to do.
He had his deposit down for his college and I was about to do the same for the same school. When I told him the news he immediately dropped out of the college that was a few hours away and enrolled in community college for the fall. We both wanted to keep the baby but he also said he would stand by whatever decision I would make. We were together for almost 2 years when this happened. Well we told his parents first and they were really supportive. We both were 18 and had a strong relationship. My mom and family on the other hand were VERY angry. My mom kept pushing for abortion and I cried EVERYDAY because of the way my family was putting pressure on me. I did not know what to do so I went along with my family and had an abortion. I seemed like the only young woman there who actually cared about what I was about to do. I cried the entire time there and I knew my mom would be furious if I didn’t go through with it. The procedure was painful physically and emotionally. I felt awful. I was so angry with myself.
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Hi Becky,
I am 24, just started a new job and am in a relationship with a guy that was my best friend…. I have a 5yr old son and he is Great, i had an abortion 3yrs ago with my ex because he didn’t want the baby. I just found out that i am about 2 weeks pregnant but i am not sure if i should have the baby because i am scared that what if my boy friend and I dont work out, i always wanted to have my next kids after marriage and our relationship is not a definate. I was happy when i found out i was pregnant but my mom told me that i am making a mistake to even consider keeping the babyI am afraid that my boss wont be impressed cause i have only been here 2 months. I have my first Doctors visit tomorrow and i am nervous because i don’t know what to do. Abort or keep…? Please Help
Regards, Helen
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Hi Becky,
I’m writing to day to hopefully inspire one girl, somewhere. I found out I was pregnant a little after i turned 17. I was a run away and heavily addicted to drugs. When i found out i cried for hours and when i told the father of my baby i was pregnant he said “take care of it” as in…get an abortion. I was mortified. That word in my head was not realistic, it sickened me to hear that from someone i cared so much about. I moved back home and stopped all drug use and started researching my options. My mom did not know why i moved back, until a little later she had the motherly feeling that i was pregnant. And her response to me when i finally came out and told her was…..get an abortion. I threw up instantly hearing those words again. I knew in my heart that i could never do that. Even though when i was at the doctors they told me “you know its still early you can just take a pill, you will only have cramps and bleeding” and I walked out of that doctors office right after she said that. I was so saddened to see how our society has become. How easy it is to just…get an abortion. So with my mom being of no support, i got a job that I walked 4 miles to work everyday and back late at night.
She was persistent about me not keeping the child so then i was told i HAD to call an adoption agency. When the woman came from the agency she was very sweet, showed us profiles of hopeful parents. I could not talk through the whole interview. We kept the profiles and said we would call her back. I never did. Though i am all for adoption agencies, the hopefuls are amazing people who deserve children. But i knew in my heart this baby was mine.
So that day i went and bought a pregnancy book set up my first ob appointment. From the day i heard his heart beat i told myself i will do anything and everything to keep this baby and give him everything he deserves. So i decided to leave my house and move to another state with my babies grandfather. He said he would house me. I stayed in the other state until my son was born. It was the most amazing experience i had ever felt, seen, heard. It brings tears to my eyes at the moment just to think of this moment. I left the father of my beautiful son when he was a month. I was so happy to be able to leave him, he was abusive, drug user and cheated on me regularly. I delt with him in the other state just so i
would have a place to have my baby. Once i had my son my mom changed her mind and begged me to come back and live with her. Till this day she apologizes for ever mentioning an abortion.
Now my son is 2. Our birthdays are 1 day apart. I was 17 when he was born and then spent my 18th birthday in the hospital with the best gift i have ever gotten. I was so blessed. Now i get to have an experience no one else does. He is my other half, were together everywhere. And education does not end. I am graduating this semester with my associates degree and transferring to a cal state! My son and I are unbreakable and im happy i did everything i could to have him.
Abortion is not the answer. Im a single mom and loving every minute!! xo
Dearest Rachele – hi, I’m Lisa and I’m from the Stand Up Girl website.
When I read your e-mail I couldn’t help but just be in awe of your
mature and loving Stand for life. I’m amazed at the amazing woman and
Stand Up Girl that you are Rachele!
Would it be OK with you if we posted your story on our Stand Up Girl
website? I just know that it will touch the heart of many around the
globe. Just let me know.
I’m sure your mom is absolutely blown away at her grandson and is so
very proud of you for taking a Stand. Thank you so much for sharing
your wonderful Stand Up Girl story with us.
Please keep in touch. We love hearing good things.
Take care of yourself.
Luv Lisa
Hi Becky,
I’m writing to day to hopefully inspire one girl, somewhere. I found out I was pregnant a little after i turned 17. I was a run away and heavily addicted to drugs. When i found out i cried for hours and when i told the father of my baby i was pregnant he said “take care of it” as in…get an abortion. I was mortified. That word in my head was not realistic, it sickened me to hear that from someone i cared so much about. I moved back home and stopped all drug use and started researching my options.
My mom did not know why i moved back, until a little later she had the motherly feeling that i was pregnant. And her response to me when i finally came out and told her was…..get an abortion. I threw up instantly hearing those words again. I knew in my heart that i could never do that. Even though when i was at the doctors they told me “you know its still early you can just take a pill, you will only have cramps and bleeding” and I walked out of that doctors office right after she said that. I was so saddened to see how our society has become. How easy it is to just…get an abortion. So with my mom being of no support, i got a job that I walked 4 miles to work everyday and back late at night. She was persistent about me not keeping the child so then i was told i HAD to call an adoption agency. When the woman came from the agency she was very sweet, showed us profiles of hopeful parents. I could not talk through the whole
interview. We kept the profiles and said we would call her back. I never did. Though i am all for adoption agencies, the hopefuls are amazing people who deserve children. But i knew in my heart this baby was mine.
So that day i went and bought a pregnancy book set up my first ob appointment. From the day i heard his heart beat i told myself i will do anything and everything to keep this baby and give him everything he deserves. So i decided to leave my house and move to another state with my babies grandfather. He said he would house me. I stayed in the other state until my son was born. It was the most amazing experience i had ever felt, seen, heard. It brings tears to my eyes at the moment just to think of this moment. I left the father of my beautiful son when he was a month. I was so happy to be able to leave him, he was abusive, drug user and cheated on me regularly. I dealt with him in the other state just so i would have a place to have my baby.
Once i had my son my mom changed her mind and begged me to come back and live with her. Till this day she apologizes for ever mentioning an abortion. Now my son is 2. Our birthdays are 1 day apart. I was 17 when he was born and then spent my 18th birthday in the hospital with the best gift i have ever gotten. I was so blessed. Now i get to have an experience no one else does. He is my other half, were together everywhere. And education does not end. I am graduating this semester with my associates degree and transferring to a cal state! My son and I are unbreakable and I’m happy i did everything i could to have him. Abortion is not the answer. I’m a single mom and loving every minute!! xo
Dearest Rachele – hi, I’m Lisa and I’m from the Stand Up Girl website. When I read your e-mail I couldn’t help but just be in awe of your mature and loving Stand for life. I’m amazed at the amazing woman and Stand Up Girl that you are Rachele!
Would it be OK with you if we posted your story on our Stand Up Girl website? I just know that it will touch the heart of many around the globe. Just let me know.
I’m sure your mom is absolutely blown away at her grandson and is so very proud of you for taking a Stand. Thank you so much for sharing your wonderful Stand Up Girl story with us.
Please keep in touch. We love hearing good things.
Take care of yourself.
Luv Lisa
My story begins as I was already a single mom stuggling to care for my 2 year old son. On August 3rd, 2003, I non-chalantly took a pregnancy test, convinced at that time it would be negative. I was wrong, 3 minutes and two lines on a stick later, I was floored to find out I was yet again pregnant and I hadn’t spoken to or even seen the guy I had been sleeping with.
I immediately knew that keeping the baby was not an option, for alot of reasons. I listened to one of my bet friends and she told me that she had gone through 4 abortions and the procedure was not painful and I would feel fine afterward. I asked her if she ever thought of those babies around what would have been their due dates, and she replied that she didn’t even remember any of the due dates.
This surprised me and also let me know the difference between the two of us, I would always think of the baby I was carrying around the expected due date, which was coincidentally, was only a week away from my own son’s birthday. I continued to listen to my friend and came up with the over 500 dollars it would cost to have an abortion. I made and kept an appointment with the abortion clinic, my name was called(I was there alone), I followed the nurse back to a room where she drew a small amount of blood. Then I was herded into a series of 3 full waiting rooms of women there to do the same thing I was going to do. I felt an overwhelming feeling of death, all around, in the somber faces of the other women there including my own. I wrestled with myself and whether or not this was going to be a decision I would be able to live with. As I sat, alone, I prayed silently and pretended to read a magazine that was provided. what was I supposed to do read about current events while I was about to kill a baby?!
I have never before or since, heard the voice of God so loudly in my head. God was crying out to me saying repeatedly “Brooke, don’t do this, I have a plan for this baby, don’t do this!!!!” I still continued to stay at that horrible clinic long enough to see the “fetus” on an ultrasound, I began to cry uncontrollably, and inquired as to how much it would cost if I left then, without having the procedure done. 125 dollars saved the life of the “fetus”. I was still dead set on not keeping the baby, I couldn’t handle it financially or otherwise. I began contacting different adoption agencies, and only one agency called me back, that is the one that I decided to go through. I met with the birthparent counselor when I was about 4 months pregnant, I began the process of placing the baby for adoption, by then I knew the baby was a boy. I did my best not to become attached to the growing baby inside of me, it was a very hard thing to do. I chose the perfect family through a huge stack of profiles of families wanting to adopt a baby. The family I chose were willing to have an open adoption, which was my only condition of the adoption. I met with them in January of 2004, and kept in touch via email during the last few months of my pregnancy. I fell in love with them.
I wasn’t due to have the baby until april 7th, but since I had hidden my pregnancy from my entire family during the holidays, and Easter was just around the corner and I wanted to be there, not pregnant. I asked my doctor if I could be induced early so that I could be with my family for Easter, he surprisingly said yes. An induction was scheduled for March 29, 2004. I excitedly emailed the parents I had chosen and let them know that the induction had been scheduled and they would have their baby in less than a week! They were excited as I was, but for very different reasons. I was excited because after the baby was born, my life was back to normal. They were excited for the obvious reason that they would be getting their new baby sooner than planned! The day came to deliver the baby, I wanted the adoptive parents in the delivery room with me because I felt that if this was to be their child, I wanted them to see him from the time he took his first breath. The delivery room was filled with love, and God’s presence was thick within the walls of that room. Nurses were crying, and praising me on the decision I was making. The whole thing was unbelievably beautiful, and I have since wanted to go back to that day, just to feel the love that was there that day.
They named him Evan, and he will be 5 years old this March. Everytime I get to see his beautiful face I am reminded of the devastating decision I almost made in that clinic that day in September of 2003. I suppose that I am writing just to let other girls know that there are other options than abortion, which could save alot of woman from making a mistake that could haunt them for the rest of their lives. I think about Evan everyday, but at least in my case, they are very happy thoughts about a very happy little boy, who holds a very, very special place in my heart. I adore his mom and dad, they are so hospitable in allowing me to visit with Evan anytime my schedule allows. I thank god everyday for giving me the guidance to leave that clinic, and following his direction in finding the perfect family and creating a healthy beautiful baby boy, for his parents and for the feelings I am sometimes overwhelmed with concerning Evan and how he came to be. I still work with the agency with counseling young women who are confused about what to do with their unplanned pregnancy. I have experience as a single mom as well as, a bithmother. Thank you for giving me an outlet in which I can tell my beautiful story of Evan. I have been visiting this site since I was pregnant with Evan. It helped me, and I hope that my story will help other confused and scared girls. Keep your head up, and know that there is support and strength through these situations with the help of God and good friends and family.
Brooke
Hi Brooke,
Thank you so much for writing. I love your story it was so inspiring.
You know, so many people have a similar experience with abortion – sitting
in the waiting room in anguish. Your story is so different though. You
stood up and walked out. That took so much courage, but it takes courage to
do the right thing. Your email is so inspiring. Not only that, it takes so
much more courage to acknowledge that you love your child and you want to
give him or her the best, but to realize that you are not always able to do
that. I am so inspired that you loved your child so much as to make an
adoption plan so that he could have the best life possible. Your child will
ALWAYS respect you for the difficult decision and the deep sacrifice that
you had to make for him. He is lucky you have a mother as wonderful as you.
I am thrilled that you have found so much encouragement from the Stand Up
Girl site. We are happy to be here for you, but you are truly an
inspiration to us and you are the definition of a Stand Up Girl.
Please keep in touch.
Much love,
April