I was 15 when I found out I was pregnant. I took a number of tests to make sure I was. I never thought this would happen to me out of all the people. I knew, even when my mum got pregnant at such a young age, you would of thought I would of known better. I was the last out of my main friends to have sex, but the first to get pregnant. How bizarre.
It all started when I met this lad through one of my friends. He was much older than me; he was 19, but he was a nice genuine lad and treated me like I meant something. We started talking then it all began from there, I guess. I used to go to his house a lot of the time but I wasn’t cining him. I didn’t want to get cining anyone after my last relationship ended badly. He picked me up from places, he was always there when I needed him sometimes. I never respected him for what he used to do, but you learn from your mistakes, I guess. I slept at his house a number of times, but he never once tried anything on with me. Finally, I ended up getting with him. It was going great. Then one night, I had sex with him using no contraception. How stupid of me.
I got up that morning and told my best mate and she took me straight to the walking centre for the morning after pill. I thought to myself, I’m never going to have unprotective sex again. But saying one thing & doing another is something else. I had unprotective sex with him a number of times but one time we did it. I just knew I was pregnant from then on but I never thought to check. My friends were saying I should check just in case so my first pregnancy test came up positive but I just knew it wasn’t right, I can’t be. Then I took another 2 tests and it still didn’t convince me that I was. So early September, I went to the walking centre and took one with the doctor and she said I was. My feelings that day were indescribable. It just felt like my whole world was crashing down & there was nothing I could do about it. Still, I was in denial about myself. Where was I meant to go from there?.
I told my sister first that I was. I remember her face looking disappointed in me, a face of shame & anger but she was there for me every step of the way, & I thanks her for everything, she’s irreplaceable. Then I told my main friends but it was difficult. They all had mixed feeling and opinions about me, but I wasn’t too fussed what they fought as long as I knew what was going on. It was a long hard decision I had to make, with one of my mates being a strong believer that abortion was wrong. It confused me even more & I felt like I couldn’t think about what I wanted and what was for the best. I knew the next person I had to tell was my boyfriend. After all, he was the father & he did have a right to know. It felt really hard to tell him I was. I thought he would just leave me, and call me a stupid girl or something. I really didn’t know what to expect.
That night, I phoned him. I was very nervous, and worried about what he would say, but he was very supportive & offered to come down to see if I was okay and that, so it wasn’t really something for me to get worked up about!. That night, I ended up finishing him. I knew it was for the best, i mean if he can’t be bothered to use a condom then why should i be arsed with him. Days went on & I became weaker & weaker as time passed on. Being unable to talk to anyone or discuss what I was going through was tearing me apart. Some days, I would come home from school and cry for hours on end. I just felt like nothing could become any worse than what it already was. Weeks passed on & my sister was telling me I need to make a decision & stick by it. I fought long and hard that night, thinking about positive & negative points. I finally came to the decision that I would abort the baby. I mean, I had no money, no life, and no father what could I offer the baby. I had nothing left to give. I told my friends about my final decision. People tried to change my mind but I had to stick to my guns and thinks about what was best, i just ignored other people’s opinions & tried to act as normal as I could. I mean, what else could I do. Then the nights when I got in from school, that was when I broke down and showed my true feelings towards what was happening.
Abortion day: I remember this day as if it yesterday. Friday, the 12th of October, I got up early that morning as the appointment was at half past 9. I remember getting up that day & getting ready, but crying & shaking. It was unstoppable I couldn’t stop it. Millions of things were running wild round my head. I couldn’t focus on anything except what was I was about to do. We arrived at the hospital and sat in a room, waiting to be called in. There was lots of other girls in the room. They were much younger than I was 13, 14. It was weird sitting there, knowing all these other girls where going through the same things I was going through. I just sat there. I tried to focus myself. Time after my name was called out, it felt like being called in the headmaster’s office when you’ve done something wrong, Just sayin someone’s name means their next in line to get rid of this little life inside of me. I Came into the doctor’s office and then this man was sayin I can back out of this at anytime. I didn’t even think. I just said no & tried not to think about it. After the first pill, I didn’t feel anything. My mind was taking the pain for me. My emotions were all over the place. I couldn’t think straight. I remember coming out of the office and crying for the first time in front of my siter, I felt ashamed. My sister just said stay strong, you don’t want to worry the other girls. When I took the second pill, the pain was horrible. It was like having cramp pains but for hours on end. That day ended so fast. It was the biggest choice I’ve ever made and to be honest, I feel like I regret doing what I did, but you have to keep your head up and move on cause you can’t change the past.
From then on, let’s just say it been a long & difficult journey, it’s not something you just forget about. Every morning I get up, I think about what I’ve done. It will live on forever in my heart.
This website has help me express what I’ve been through. It’s something that other people have been though, so I guess it’s someone to talk to & I hope lots of other girls can read my blog and refer to me. (:
I’ve been having a lot of problems lately with my boyfriend. Everything turns into an argument!!! It’s so frustrating…
Everyone tells me I should leave him… but I love him to death…….. I’m 3 months pregnant with his baby. I’m a pretty insecure person so, along with the hormones going on, it is driving me crazy. We can’t go two hours without arguing about something stupid. He always has to be right, and he never takes responsibility for his own actions. Yet I can’t leave him. He’s my baby’s father! I know that people do it all the time on their own, but I couldn’t handle the stress b/c I don’t have my family to support me financially. So I have to do it all myself. My boyfriend doesn’t have a job yet either. I work two jobs & I go to school! Which I can’t possibly do for much longer when I start getting further along. Thanx to me workin, we got about 300$ in the bank that I’ve been saving up with. We share his bank account under his name, which I know is dangerous cuz he could take it. But I trust him that he deff wouldn’t do that b/c it’s for our baby. We just got into another fight just now, about him not gettin enuff sleep & that’s his own fault cuz he didn’t go to bed till 4 am and it’s almost 2:30 now and I gotta go to work at 4 and I wanna spend some time with him, but he just keeps yellin at me everytime I try to wake him up & he made me cry. :[ IDK what 2 do.
I REALLY, really don’t want to do this but I’m thinkin if I don’t get into this school for pregnant girls, then I’m gonna have 2 quit school. Cuz I’m 17 and I’m still a sophomore. I got 2 years left and I’m supposed to be havin my baby in May. I can’t think str8 right now. I’m pretty pissed off at my boyfriend right now. Right after we fought, he went right back to bed and he got up for like 5 mins wanting to bring me home cuz I “was annoying him.” How is he tired if he doesn’t work and he ain’t pregnant. I’m the one who worked last night and he didn’t do jack. He didn’t even go job hunting like he said he would. I’m about ta go off on him.
Hi, I’m 18 and I’ve had the greatest experience of being a new mom.
Although this is not my first pregnancy, I felt that everything was so new when I found out I was pregnant. I was pregnant once before when I was 15 by my first love of 4 years and I had an abortion because for one, I was too young and I wasn’t ready. At that time, I didn’t understand how it felt to have someone love you and care for you truly. Me and my best friend, whom I have called my brother since I was 6, happened to decide we love each other not in that brotherly-sisterly way anymore when I was 16.
A year went by great and Oct 25, I found out I was 3 months pregnant. I was in such shock. I’m 17 in my senior in high school and planned on attending a D1 University. Although it was a shock, I felt like I had a chance again because of what I had done before. Me and MY BOYFRIEND, whom became my fiancé the year before, were perfect. My pregnancy was so hard. I was always sick but I managed to stay on honors in school. it was a hard decision but I’m pro- choice. I worked and went to school everyday which I stopped doing two days before I went into labor. I gave birth to a baby girl I named her A’Bryauna. She was born on my class day, May 25. I love my daughter and I feel she loves me. It’s hard with me and my fiancé. I work two jobs and go to college and still manage to be a mom for us to meet ends totally on our own.
I feel great at all that I achieved and definitely loved!!!!!!!!!!! If I can do it, any1 can.
I am 18 years old and have blonde hair and blue eyes. My screen name is MissMyKidz because I have had 3 miscarriages and I truly do miss them.
Though 2 of them were a result of rape, I still grew quite attached to them. The first one was from a date rape and I lost him at 5 months. I had named him Isaiah Riley. The second one, also from that situation, I lost at 4 months and I had named her Allura Marie. The last was my boyfriend’s and we lost her at 2 months. He had only known for a week when it happened so we hadn’t named her yet.
I am into extreme sports and music. I love playing my guitar and jamming out with my friends and the youth director. Right now, I am in college and next semester I will be doing my EMT course.
If there is anything else you want to know, just ask… I am relatively open and don’t mind answering questions…about anything… Catch you guys later.
Hi everybody,
I’m 19, engaged, have a decent job that pays good and I really want to have a baby. Me and my man decided that I should come off the pill in July and have been doing it unprotected since. Granted, we don’t get to do it often at all since he moved back to London, but it’s something that’s getting to be an issue with me. To make matters worse, my workplace is right next to a baby store, plus there’s one round the corner so every time I go to work or leave, I see a window full of gorgeous prams, baby care stuff, and baby clothes. I know that we haven’t been able to properly try to get pregnant and I found out that I was trying at the wrong times of my cycle anyway but even so, I seem to see or hear about so many girls that get pregnant just like that or first time round and it hasn’t happened yet. I know I should trust in the fact that everything happens at the right time but it is getting to me a little.
Plus so many people around me are getting pregnant. It’s not fair! 🙂
I started dating my boyfriend last year. I knew he had an ex-girlfriend who would not leave him alone. She was obsessed with him and called or texted him all day long. I would scan his phone and notice that he never answered her phone calls or replied to her text messages. In the beginning of February, my brother told me that he heard my boyfriend had a high school girlfriend. I’m in college. I didn’t think too much about it b/c his ex is in high school and I just thought she was trying to start something. I asked him about it and he told me that his ex is a complete liar.
By the following month, his phone started peeping all the time. Now he’s getting like 50 text messages a day from a different chick. I asked him about it and he said she’s a girl that went to high school with us. She’s just a good friend. I was naive and just believed him. But curiosity got the best of me one day and I started reading these text messages. It broke my heart to find out he was cheating on me with the ‘friend’ and his ex. I packed up anything I have at his house and took it back to my dorm room. I was so furious I can’t even bare to look at him.
Spring Break started that day. I thought I could use the break to think about how I was going to destroy him. I’m hanging out with my best friend and she’s talking about how she just started her period a day ago and was glad. I look at my calendar and notice I should have started mine a week ago. We look at each other and instantly know we’re going to Wal-Mart. We grab our purses and keys and walk out the door. Go to Wal-Mart, debate on which pregnancy test to buy. Head back to her apt, go straight to the bathroom. Three minutes later, the piss test claims I’m pregnant. She tell me I need to go see my doctor on Monday. Being Spring Break, my doctor had no appt for the week. So she was free to see me. Sure enough I was pregnant! Great. I just found out my boyfriend was cheating and now I’ve also found out I’m pregnant!! I’m more mad but I believe firmly that if you think you’re responsible enough to have sex, then you’re responsible enough for the consequences.
I personally don’t want to tell my boyfriend. I was ready to move on and leave his sorry butt. My best friend insist that it’s his right to know and that if after we talk, I still want to leave him, that’s my right. She dragged me to go visit my boyfriend. When I told him I’m pregnant, I leave out the fact that I know he’s cheating. He looks stunned! I told him I would give him some time to think about what he wants to do. I return the next day, we’re sitting on the couch in his parent living room. He told me he want to take care of me and the baby. The look in his eyes, he was excited, happy and being honest. So I thought he would be faithful now that I was pregnant and he wanted to start a family with me. Boy was I ever wrong. Not only did he NOT stop seeing those two but he started talking to a chick he worked with. The worst part about all of this is that all three of these chicks know me. They know I’m pregnant, and they know I’m his girlfriend but they don’t care and still go on to help him cheat. After it’s confirmed that he’s cheating on me with the third girl, I avoided him. I’m four months pregnant at this point. Of course, I go see my doctor to get tested to make sure I don’t have any STD’s. He comes looking for me two days later. Asked me what was wrong. I yell at him and tell him I know about all three of his girls. By the end of our 2 hour long conversation, he has convinced me that he will stop b/c he loves me and want to have a family with me. Boy I’m a sucker!
Then the semester finished and his ex graduated high school. Well, his mom is in love with his ex. So much that she invites her to live with them since she currently lived with a foster parent that did not care for her. So for the summer, I lived with my boyfriend at his parent house with his ex. Talk about the worse possible 3 months of my life. His mother hated me, his ex pretended I didn’t exist, and his dad loves me. I hate being there and can’t wait to go back to college. One day, the ‘friend’ showed up to visit. I walk into the house and my boyfriend, his ex and the ‘friend’ are all in the living room talking. I tell him we’re going to a movie. We go to the kitchen and he tell me he just can’t leave when he was company. I tell him to send her home or just leave her hear with his mom. He tried to come up with some other excuses. I tell him that when I leave if he does not come with me, I will not be returning. I go change my clothes and get ready to leave 2 mins later. He comes with me. Funny part is that the ‘friend’ was furious that he left with me. She was wanting to spend time with him. She told him she never want to see or hear from him again. One down, two to go.
I go see the third girl at work. I told her I know she had sex with my boyfriend and that if she ever so much as looks at him again, I would tell her boyfriend that she had cheated. She looks worried and scared. But she’s stupid. She sent my boyfriend a text later that night, which he never received since I erased it. But the next day, I went to have a talk with her boyfriend. He dumped her and she moped around for a couple of weeks. She eventually quit b/c she couldn’t stand to look at her ex-boyfriend with the new cashier. Now the only one I can’t get rid of is his ex, b/c of his mom. His mom is hoping he will see the light and leave me. Things were a lot better after that bit of drama. Everything was fine for the next 2 months. Then his friends start calling me, telling me that his ex is pregnant and that he’s the dad.
I was shocked and couldn’t believe it. I talked to him about it. He confirmed it and told me he’s asked her to get an abortion b/c it was a mistake. Apparently, that weekend back in May when I was avoiding him b/c I found out about the third girl, the ex went into his room, knowing I would show up. She was on birth control so he didn’t use a condom. I was so upset I didn’t talk to him for weeks. He would call and text but I just ignored him. One night, he sent me a text, telling how sorry he was that he ruined my life, that he was just a moron who got me pregnant and now had nothing to live for. I asked him if his daughter’s life was worth him living for. He said it was probably the only thing worth living for. I left him and he did need me. He could have easily just gone back to his ex, he even had her there in the same house. But he didn’t want her, he wanted me. If he wanted me so much, why put me through so much torture.
I agreed to go to Stillwater with him, that way we could talk. It’s an hour drive. We talk all the way there. He told me he wanted me to live with him. He has his own house in Stillwater. He promised he will take care of me and our baby. I asked what he planned to do about ex and her baby. He said he would be there for his kid but had no intention on ever going back to her. Once we’re on campus, we go our separate ways to enroll for the new semester. Somehow, I ended up with his phone. I notice b/c it vibrates in my pocket. I pull it out, it’s a text from the ex. I go through all his text messages. All from her wanting him back. Telling him that they can have a family together. She’s basically begging for him to return to her. She tells him that he’s the love of her life and that she would put up with this from anyone else. In his replies, he turns her down over and over again.
She’s still trying to get some or any attention from him. Couple weeks ago, she told him she’s considering putting the baby up for adoption. She only does this to mess with him. Well, he does not reply or even talk to her for two weeks. She sent him another message stating she’s going to keep the baby, she’ll figure out how to handle it. She makes it seem like she’s on her own when she’s not! She had a free ticket to stay with his mom for a very long time. She doesn’t have to worry about paying bills or work or school or the baby. She’ll have his mom to help her the entire time. She has his mom’s support mentally, physically, and emotionally. But all of that is not good enough for her, she wants him. Today she sent him a message telling him, she wishes he would be more involved but that she will figure out how to manage without him. She just wants to stress him out. I hate her for that. I could hate her for so much more but I only hate it that she tries to stress him out. He has enough on his plate right now.
So, maybe I should write a book with all the juicy details about my life while pregnant?
