Hello… About a week ago, I found out I was pregnant.
The guy I’m with, we have been together for about 4 months. We’re fine one day and then the next, we hate each other. Me being pregnant would ruin our lives. We didn’t talk for a week then on a Friday, I told him I might be pregnant. He met me after work and we bought a pregnancy test, it was positive. The two pink lines appeared right away! I was just thinking that it could be wrong that it takes 3 minutes to appear. It didn’t hit me till later that night that I was pregnant. We cried for the whole night. All I wanted to do was hold him, hug him! I didn’t want to let him go!
We had decided that abortion would be the right thing to do… The right thing for us and our baby! We can’t even support ourselves and definitely couldn’t support a baby! We both work part-time and I’m in school. I still couldn’t settle the fact I was pregnant so I took another test. It was positive again! The next day, I called a Planned Parenthood office to make an appointment to talk to someone. I have chosen to do the procedure. All I could think about is that This baby shouldn’t have to live a life with parents that still live with their parents and can’t support themselves. I took another test and it did come back positive again. They gave me an ultrasound and there was my baby. I am not even 5 weeks. I’m scheduled to have my procedure 2 weeks from now and I’m scared.
Lately I’ve been changing my mind. Do I wanna keep the baby or continue with the termination? I tell my boyfriend and all he can do is remind me of the bad things about having a kid. Nothing is positive. He told me he refuses to have a kid as this kid would ruin our lives…
I was just 18 when I found out I was pregnant. I had been with my partner for 5 months.
In that time, he had already cheated on me, but we were trying to work it out… I was so blinded and so in love with him, I would have done anything for him. The first thing he said to me when I told him I was pregnant was, “Well, have an abortion” like there was no choice. I was too scared to object and there was no way I wanted to tell my parents. So we didn’t tell many people and I went through the process. I got such bad morning sickness. I was throwing up every morning and working 16-hour days. It was hell for me, and he was out drinking every night and spending all our rent money on alcohol. So I went ahead with the termination. I was so sick of feeling how I was and thought I’d soon lose him if I wasn’t there to go to town and drink with him. After the termination, I felt relief and thought I’d just forget it and move on but I didn’t. It’s like there was a part of me missing and constantly aching and I couldn’t fill that void. He promised me we’d have another chance, that we’d wait till we were 23. So I stopped telling people how much it hurt, how much I regretted it, and blocked it out, pretending everything was ok.
I then again found out I was pregnant 5 days before my 20th birthday. I was back living at home and told my mum. she wasn’t happy but said I had to decide because I’d already had one. I figured again it was the easiest thing to do and that because I’d done it once, it would be ok to do it again. Again after this one, I had complications and had about a month of work and started drinking heavily again, wrecking every relationship I tried to start,
And now I feel so confused and so alone. I want to cry at the smallest things. My best friend got pregnant and the father wanted nothing to do with it, yet she kept it. I felt so jealous that she was strong enough to go ahead with it and struggle to be around her. Everytime I see babies or baby clothes or toys, I want to cry. It’s like this void inside of me that I can’t fill and I don’t know what to do anymore. And I’m so scared to tell my church leaders or anyone there for the fact they might judge me or not like me anymore because of what I’ve done..
I miss my babies everyday. How do I cope with this? Its been over 3 years since the first one and almost 2 since the 2nd, yet it feels like just yesterday…
My Progress:
Week Five:
Okay, so today has been an emotional rollercoaster. It finally hit home that I am 90% pregnant and I got so scared that I kept thinking I can’t raise this baby and I’ll have to get an abortion. During my shift, I thought about it more and I couldn’t stop smiling!
I’ve decided on how I’m going to tell my mum. (If she agrees, which she will) I’ll live with my mum for five years until the baby goes to school and I can work full time to support him (don’t know the sex, but hoping for a boy). Going to take the pregnancy test on Friday/Saturday when I’m at my boyfriend’s so I can experience it with him and tell him in person. Going to call the doctor ASAP, even picked out the childminder I’m going to hire after maternity leave!
I’m very happy, but I’m not treating this like some fairy tale. I know it’s going to be hard and I know my boyfriend isn’t going to like it. We’ve talked seriously about children because a sex life comes with that risk. But right now, he finds talking about children laughable because we’re teenagers. I understand that because he has no clue about my suspicions. We had a pregnancy scare once before about three months ago… It turned out negative, but he got nothing, but angry at me and refused to talk to me. Saying it was my fault for putting off going on the pill. I don’t trust him until I know it’s definitely positive. I’m not having him destroying my happiness in this. He once said that he won’t plan to have children. He doesn’t particularly want them (he’s considering a vasectomy), but he will love a child if he has one. I don’t trust him to not fly off the handle, but I do trust him to stick by me. And I know his ridiculously noble stepfather is going to push him to help support too…
I joined this site because I’m so excited and so happy, but I can’t tell a soul until I take the test. Well, I can tell some souls I don’t know I suppose! I just know this site is going to be a great support and I plan to stay on here for the duration of my pregnancy and, if I have time around my bouncing baby boy, I’ll update afterwards too.
I’m planning on posting some videos on a public site (I’m not sure if I can mention the name on here so not taking the risk) throughout my pregnancy, kind of like this blog. Wait, that’s called a Vlog…well anyway! It’ll be detailing my ups, downs, the test, the ultrasound, the father… Everything that I think will help any teenager in my position. I’m doing this while in a low-paying part-time job and having to rely on my mother for a while. But that won’t be forever.
Oh, and I’ve named my baby!!! Nicholas Jared. Jared’s my father’s name and while my dad hasn’t been there for me much, he pulled through for someone who didn’t really want to be a dad. Even the little he did for me, I appreciate. He didn’t want to be a father, but I’ve accepted that and what he’s done is astounding in that situation. He’s not been much of a father, but he’s been the bravest man I’ve ever known. And I’ll always love him for that.
Sixteen and (might be) pregnant! Expecting a New Year baby! <3
It’s weird, ya know. One day, everything’s fine and you wake up and find out some huge news. From then on, you know it’ll either be for the better or for the worse.
I tried to make my decision based on trust, you know. I trusted my boyfriend to be there for me cuz he always has, but now he can’t. No doubt he would be here if he could. We really loved each other, no matter what anyone says. We were going to make it. I miss him a lot and I know he’s a great father, but I made my decision depending on others. Now I know I can’t depend on anyone but myself, just like my baby has to depend on me. I have my mom and I’m thankful for that, but now my baby has no father because of her decision that controls me and my baby’s life. I know what it’s like to see everyone at school with a mother and dad, something you didn’t know you were even supposed to have and it hurts. I just don’t want my child to feel that pain and grow up with hate for its dad when I know he would’ve been here. At first, I hated the thought of a baby, but then I knew it was God’s gift to me, someone as little as a baby to love me and help me take more responsibility.
It’s a gift, not a curse. It’s a baby.
Hello, I’m 16… I’m 32 weeks pregnant and very excited…
I’m still so very young, but I’m taking responsibility for this little one… I’ve been with the dad for a year now… We are deeply in love… Me and him have done tons of baby shopping and he got a new place that is stable for us and the baby… Since we have met, we haven’t gone more than a day without seeing each other… He’s 21. The age doesn’t bother me or my family… But I’m under the ministry… I was 15 when I got pregnant and since I was 15, almost 16, they charged him for sexual assault cause I wasn’t legal to make decisions… As hard as that is, I barely have any friends really… I was into the pot and drinking. I never hung out with girls because they tend to start drama and such with my boyfriend and I, telling him I wasn’t good enough for him and everything, trying to pull us apart… So from a year ago, it’s been me and my boyfriend… Now since the RCMP put a charge on him, we aren’t allowed to see each other… This is so hard…
I talk to him everyday and we really want to be together and we love each other… He wants to support the child and be a father. His whole life, he hasn’t had blood related family and he’s been in and out of foster care until he was able to get out… I’m his only family now. He tells me everyday that he wants to be with me for the rest of his life. I feel the same with him… Even if we are young , we found true love with one another…
I live with my grandmother. She has been raising my 3 brothers and 2 sisters since we were young. Our parents left us for their selfish ways for alcohol and hard drugs… My 2 older siblings have moved out ( my older brother has drug problems too and has anger issues)-( my sister has a drinking problem and anger issues ). So there’s me and my 15 year old brother and and our little siblings age 5 and 7… We live in a small home, only 3 bedrooms… The house is old and needs a lot of work on it… But thing’s have been getting really hard the past couple of months.. I love kids and love my siblings… They were both born with crack or alcohol in there system, so its really hard for them to cope and learn… My brother who’s 15 is into the pot and drinking… (Me and brother who’s 15 are the only 2 out of the family that were born without drugs or alcohol). Thing’s are starting to really hurt me… I’m losing my brother to the pot.. I never see him. He’s always tucked in his room… We use to be so close… And my gramma is getting older and getting depressed. Money is tight and my older siblings take her for granted. They come over asking for money all the time, calling her names… Me, my 15 year old brother, and grandmother cannot stand up to my older brother… You never know what he would do… So I have to sit here , and make sure when conflict goes on in the house, I take the kids outside to play or take them to the other room so they don’t have to hear the fighting and swearing… We have family counselling at the moment and it seems to help a bit. So to sum it up, My grandmother is getting weaker, my siblings have a hard time listening, my brother who’s 15 is distant, and then there’s me. Soon to be mother, having to already care for my younger siblings. Clean everyday ,help with dinner, and I just got back into school through a teen mother agency program…
I also have very bad back problems. Never mind being pregnant ( when I was 6, I was in a car accident. My brother couldn’t get his seatbelt on, so I took mine off and got his on. Once it clicked in, all I remember is looking forward and hitting my back against the dashboard and being knocked out, which I do not regret at all. I don’t know what I would have done if he went through the windshield), so I can’t sit nor stand too long… I barely get sleep at night. I get at least 6 hours from tossing and turning, not being able to get comfortable… On top of everything, I don’t have my boyfriend’s shoulder to lean on or to massage me, or to feel the baby move or go to prenatal classes with me… So the moment being, my grandmother and I are trying to get visiting rights… So he will be able to attend prenatal and the birth and visits… As much as we want to be a family, the government is stopping us… There shouldn’t be another single mom out there… He’s the only mentally and emotional support I have, next to my grandmother. I love him and I love my family, but I’m getting exhausted, sore, worn out… I feel like curling up in a ball and not existing for a month so I can get some rest, but I can’t… My older brother puts me down all the time for having this baby. He calls me many names and talks behind my back… I don’t believe in abortions, I keep telling him that, but he puts me down even more. I’m happy with my decision.
My point is… All your girls out there… Never give up! Thing’s will come around… The only thing you can do for you and the baby is to be a good role model and love him/her till the end… Because in the end, all you have is your family, your memories through thick and thin, and a very strong personality… Be strong and get through it!
PS: I’m looking forward to meeting my wee one… I’m not sure if its a boy or girl until the due date – July 18th… The baby is heathy… All I need is my love, my family, and hoping the charge against my love will be dropped…
Good night & take care.
I am 8 weeks pregnant and we still don’t know what is our baby’s gender. But we’re starting to think of names for the baby. Please give me suggestions for a boy’s or girl’s name. We want a name that starts with Y or Z .
Thanks in advance 😉
