Almost 2 years ago, I met the love of my life. I knew right away that we were going to get married. I told my mom and she 100% supported me and if she didn’t, I had no idea. But my dad was a different story. He was totally against it and didn’t talk to me for almost 8 months.
Well, me and my husband did as I had suspected and got married January 27th, this year. One week after the wedding, I found out I was pregnant. It was a honeymoon baby. I was so ecstatic because that was the one thing both of us had wanted. Of course, I was scared to death. Unfortunately, we got another surprise. 1 month later, I miscarried. It was horrible. I was very depressed. But I still felt like I was pregnant. Of course, I was trying to tell myself I wasn’t. Well, 2 months went by and still hadn’t started my period. I told my husband I was pregnant and he didn’t believe me. so one night we were eating at Taco Bell and I slipped away to the bathroom and took a pregnancy test. When I showed him, he was so happy. But I couldn’t be happy. I was so terrified that I started crying because I didn’t want to loose this baby too. My mom had told me when I was younger that if I got pregnant, she was going to make me have an abortion so I was nervous to tell her, but I did. She was, to my surprise, happy. I told her at least I had waited longer than her. Haha. She was pregnant at 17 and had me a couple months after her birthday.
Anyways, now I’m 16 weeks and 2 days with a very healthy baby and I couldn’t be more ecstatic. I’m very nervous especially because I don’t have my own home yet. I’m still really young and there’s no way that without my mom i could make it in todays world alone. I’ve wanted to have kids since I was 13 years old. and it’s a miracle I didn’t end up with one. I’ve had 3 miscarriages, 1 because the dad beat me, and I have never used condoms. I was very stupid when I was younger and even though I’m still a baby myself, at least I’m 18.
All my life, I wanted to be 18 but I’m still no older or ready to live my own life than I was 18 years ago. I still get upset when I can’t stay the night at my mom’s house. She makes jokes with me all the time saying that I need to grow up that I’m going to be a mom and my come back is always, “Yea but I still have my mommy”. And it’s my opinion but I don’t think abortion is a correct answer to all situations. Adoption is a choice I would have made if I had been younger. But now that I’m pregnant, I’m not sure I could even do that. My baby is still in my stomach but I’m already so attached. It’s really a personal experience that only you can make the decision on.
Even though mommy and daddy may want you to have an abortion or give your baby up for adoption, it’s still your baby, your life. You should make your own choice because mommy and daddy don’t have to live with the decision for the rest of their lives, you do. My decision is to keep the baby. I know I’m young. I know it will be the hardest thing I have ever done in my life, but I can live with that decision where I personally couldn’t live with the others.
My, my. Can anyone describe what it’s like to fall in love for the first time? My mom told me all about how my dad swept her off her feet when they met, and I wanted something like that to happen to me. It did when my new neighbors moved in when I was twelve.
The boy next door was thirteen. We hit it off, playing in one of our backyards, night after night, in tree houses, running down the block… it was so sweet. We made snowmen in the winter and tree forts in the summer.
It was the year I turned fourteen that I realized that the feelings I had for this boy were much more than friendship. I was in love! He felt that way about me too. Now, when we were out, we were kissing instead of playing in the snow. The year I turned fifteen, in the summer, was when we lost our respective virginities to each other.
He was seventeen and I was sixteen when, in front of our family and friends, he proposed. We were married almost two months later. My life was whirling around me. One condition he had for me was that we could no longer wear protection if we had sex. We were a married couple, and at that time, it made sense to me.
But now I’m five months along, and I’m maybe regretting that I’m here. All my friends are talking about university and college, while I just finished what will be my last year of formal education. They’re off doing their own thing while I’ve got a husband at home and soon, a family.
It has been a year, four months, and ten days since I had my abortion.
There is not a day that goes by without it running through my mind. My baby would be turning 1 this summer and all I can think about is how I will never feel it again. I will never touch my baby, smell my baby, or hear my baby. I was 15 weeks when I went through with the worst choice I have ever made. My boyfriend tells me that I should get over it but I don’t know how to. I was so against abortions I thought that they were the worst thing a person could do and here I am, one of those people. I have resorted to cutting like I did when I was a kid. It’s the only way I feel like I can live with myself, like I deserve to feel the pain, not only on the inside but also on the outside. I feel like no one understands what I feel, like I am alone. Not only do I feel alone, I feel like I am going to go to hell for what I did. One of the first things my boyfriend said to me after I had the abortion was that God looks down upon these sorts of things. The only reason I had the abortion was because my boyfriend left me with our two other kids, telling me that I was not allowed to keep it and that I was not allowed to give it to my aunt, who was happy to take care of it for me. He threated to kill me if I did keep it. We broke up for a while but then we got back together. I feel that, in the last year, I have made some of the worst decisions in my life.
I have no one to talk to about any of these feelings. When I try to, all I am told is how bad of a choice it was or that I need to get over it. I don’t want to get over it. I want to take it back.
I’m so confused!
OK, I just recently ended a relationship with a wonderful man! And at first, it seemed easy…but now I’m having second thoughts about leaving… I love him with everything I have in me…but there is something that is standing in my way! MY BABY! If I am pregnant, then I need to stick with the baby’s daddy…but the thing is, I don’t know if I am or not and I have no way to the doctor to find out so I’m kind of stuck!
And I don’t know what to do! I love my ex but I want to be with my baby’s daddy! What do I do?
I have been with my husband since I was thirteen years old. Although we have had our good and bad times, we have always managed to work through them all (no matter what it was). Even if we separated for a month or week or whatever, we’ve always loved each other, something that no one can take away from us.
About two years ago, I conceived our daughter, Serenity Raiyn. Even though we were happy together and me being the drama-free person that I am… I have never been more over-joyed and ecstatic. I was glowing! I gained weight.. more than what I thought, being athletic toned. I had the cravings, I was moody… I would cry for no reason or cry and didn’t know why I was crying at all.
Unfortunately, she is no longer with us. God has her, his angel.. as well as ours. We had talked about children before and the pregnancy was unexpected, even though I was nervous and worried. One thing I can say is.. I have no regret. So don’t take life for granted. No matter what you experience or whatever. Be Grateful and Enjoy every MOMENT.
Its a time. A moment in our life. We SHARED
I would never forget it.
Rest In Paradise Baby girl
*Serenity Raiyn Marshall*
Our Boricua Butterfly
<3Mommy’s Little Angel * Daddy’s Little Girl<3
Te Quiero Mama
-Mommy and Daddy-
Hi, I’m 22 in college. I’m two days late.
My period is always on time like clockwork and I haven’t been feeling like myself. I was wondering when can I test or if I should go to the doctor to get a blood test. How do I go bout that?
Well hit me back asap, thanks.
