Hi, I’m new to this website. Ummmm, I realized blogging made me feel a whole lot better when I’m stressed out.
Everyday, I push forward as if I have nothing drastic going on in my life. I am currently 34 weeks pregnant and I’m 18!… I have not completed High School, and when I think about it I feel really “down”. I actually start school this Thursday and I’m due in 5 weeks, practically. Well, my point of this blog was to be honest on how I feel about being pregnant. I can happily say I do NOT REGRET being pregnant. There are things I wish could be better though like, being in a better financial position or finishing HIGH SCHOOL but I know I will be able to take of those things. I do not see my baby as anything but a positive addition to my life. I believe my baby will help me push forward for the BEST things life has to offer us!! I would go into the topic of my boyfriend/baby daddy but time is running out on me lol.
We discuss that hopefully tomorrow!!
~MamaTave~
I am 27. I am 5 weeks pregnant. It’s a little complicated. I have known this guy for a while, over a year as friends. We decided to see if we can pursue something. I had a great holiday with me. He was great to me until the end, the last week, I fell pregnant. I was on the pill. Towards the end of my visit, he wasn’t treating me with the same enthusiasm as before.
I went back home, asked him how he felt, and expressed my sentiments about how he treated me before. He did not respond but continued to call and send me cute texts and even insisted on coming to visit me for a weekend, which I planned great things.
Four days before he came, I found out I was pregnant. I knew the timing was off and I knew we were reasonable people. So I decided to wait to tell him until he came for the visit. I get a text after preparing a super good weekend – Oh I can’t come. I have been thinking about us. I can’t have a future relationship with you. I broke down. Two days later, I told him about the pregnancy. He said the easiest thing is to terminate – I was so hurt and could not believe his insensitivity. He is 34 yrs old – has a decent job. I am financially stable and I have my Own business.
I couldn’t not imagine aborting my child. How could I from a guy I thought was great? Soon after, we had discussions and he said three things – I felt very little for you, I cannot love this child, I would terminate but if you can’t, then I will support you – But how can he when I know he didn’t want it at first? How will I look at this child when he comes to take him for visits and know his dad didn’t want him?
I was lonely. I reached out to him. He was cold. I decided to terminate. I have not done it yet, but now I look back – the anger I feel, the hurt I feel is intense. But how can I abort such a beautiful child because his father didn’t want him?
I choose to keep the child. I will deal with it – I feel so sick knowing I’m carrying a child of such a cold man but I have to now focus on me and the baby or I will miss out on the important days of growth.
I love this baby and I will be a good mother and this is the best thing that happened to me and I will not let him take it away from me: the worst is I was crazy about him and he used me and misled me.
This site has helped me. Reading all the stories, I’m no longer considering aborting – If anything, I will work harder and be more loving and live life and enjoy it. What an honor to bring a life into this world and you get to instill values and love in it.
I realize it’s heart breaking when you are alone with morning sickness but the baby will make you go on. You just have to push through.
I was 16. My boyfriend was 22 and I found out I was pregnant.
It was the happiest but scariest day ever. I came out of the bathroom, handed my Mom the test, and told her I was pregnant. She went to her room and wouldn’t speak to me. I was terrified, lost, confused and I was waiting for her to hold me and give me advice. Instead, she called me names, told me I would never amount to anything, and I was the one who was going to have to tell Daddy. Now I was crying and shaking and wanted to run away and have my baby.
Days went by and he was telling me how we were going to be a family and he had a good job to take care of us. My Mom wanted to throw him in jail and force me to abort. I didn’t think I had a choice. I didn’t know my rights. And so he paid the $250, Mom drove me and held my hand until I went under. I was terrified and I remember screaming in pain and the nurse saying “Shhhh, you’re going to scare the others.” After, she led me to a bed, slapped a pad on me, and walked out. I was crying hysterically and the other women were looking at me like I was the crazy one. They had no emotion whatsoever. They just killed their babies and they were okay with it. I broke up with him, mind you. Its been 9 years, and there is not a day that goes by that I am not stricken with guilt. I became pregnant March and yet again, my Mom wanted me to abort. I stood up to her, I told her I love my baby and that this decision is out of her hands. My son is now almost 9 months old. This is what I’ve been missing. I created another human being. That is the most marvelous, terrific, beautiful thing in the world. He is what I live for. After my abortion at 16, I contemplated suicide, now I understand what God had in store for me.
He gave me my life back in the shape of that 9lb 4oz 22in long baby boy.
I’m sick of crying and heartache, bitter, angry sobs that leave me gasping for breath. I deliberately torture myself with memories of you, to make the wounds deeper and more painful…. Hearing your laughter when the room’s empty, seeing your smile when I’m alone… I torment myself with all that you could have been today, someday, never. You are everywhere that you should have been today, someday… never…
I’m so sick of the tears that wash out all the emotions for the world to see, my shame, and the lies that keep you hidden from those who should know something, everything, nothing… My tears wash you onto my cheeks and I wipe them away… Wipe you away so that you cannot be seen today, someday, never…
I’m sick of missing you, brushing aside the memory of you today, everyday, forever… But I remember you today, pray for you, cry for you today, everyday, forever… I’m desperate and pathetic, lost and afraid today, everyday forever…
In my dreams, I see you, clear and beautiful… There are no fears and tears until I wake up to find you gone… So fresh and painful, like you were really in my arms today, someday, never…
My period is one week late and I am concerned about pregnancy.
I’m tired, have nausea, swollen breasts, and “super senses” (smell and taste). I have also experienced cramping and emotional mood swings (crying jags, but for the most part feel strangely “calm” ;). I have tried two different types of home pregnancy tests (“Answer” and “EPT”) and both are negative.
Is it possible to still be pregnant?
I think about you, in the morning when I wake, when sharing laughs with friends, between the boredom and the cool moments spent with your dad, when I lay my head on my pillow and say a little prayer, I think about you always.
What would you have looked like, big eyes like mine or small Asian-looking ones like his, short and curvy or slim and tall like your daddy? Would you laugh like me, love the same things I do? Would you write like your daddy, walk like him, have the same passion and creativity he has? OH, how I wish I could meet you, even if only just once, hold you, feed you, tell you I love you.
It’s funny cause we named you even before I knew I was pregnant. I guess you just had a really strong presence. We were gonna call you April. I hope you would have liked that name.
I was stupid, I made a selfish decision, and I’m sorry. Trust this though, you will always be in my heart, thoughts of you will always fill my head. I will always carry with me the idea of who and what my little baby would have been.
I Love You
TM
