Just a quick note about me.
I found out I was pregnant 4 days before my Senior year in high school. Very much unplanned. Very much unexpected. My boyfriend and I had been together for about 9 months or so when I became pregnant. The world was against us.
When I found out I was expecting, my world came crashing down. I had always told my boyfriend that if I were to “end up” pregnant, I would get an abortion. Simple as that, right? Wrong! I didn’t want the baby and even made an appointment for an abortion. My boyfriend and his mother were going to take me in. Then, the weekend before my appointment, I had a change of heart. My best friend took me to her Youth Pastor’s house so I could speak with his wife. Honestly, I had nothing to say to her. And she was really uncomfortable with me.
I knew that if I were to continue with the pregnancy, my boyfriend would leave me. I loved him so much. He was my world. But it was a chance I’d have to take. I told him that I couldn’t go through with an abortion and boy was he mad!! Then I had my first ultrasound and I decided that I would give the baby up for adoption. Then my Love left me. I was devastated. But I knew that he would leave. He warned me of it. He said he was too young. Everyone around him said that his life was over and his mom was really ticked off. She hated me. I was the little hooch that “trapped” her son. Over and over, she would say that we were dumb and that we wouldn’t ever have anything because of our “mistake”. (She is a Labor and Delivery nurse and has seen some pretty horrible things in her days).
My mom and sister gave me a guilt trip about adoption, promising that I could still have a normal teen experience because they would help me. But that never happened. I had my daughter in May and then I turned 18 two months later. I finished high school while I was still pregnant, but then I set out on a mission to prove that I would become “somebody”. I felt like I needed to prove that I was worthwhile and capable of overcoming a huge obstacle. I suppose my daughter was a great motivation to not fall into the partying trap.
I left home a month after my 18th birthday. I put myself through college. I moved 300 miles away from my friends and family…. all with my baby girl by my side.
My boyfriend and I were off and on, until he moved away with me so I could finish my college education. When my daughter was 8 years old, we finally got married. (She was the flower girl, haha). I remember planning for the wedding, my MIL told me how proud she was of me and that she was so sorry for saying those horrible things to me. That was like aloe on a sunburn.
Since then, my husband and I have gone on to have more children. We added 2 crazy little boys to the mix and even had another daughter.
Sadly though, while I was pregnant with our second daughter, Charlotte, I learned that she would be one sick little girl. Before finding this out, I had always said that if I took the prenatal tests and they came back weird, I would deal with it as it came. Then I had one. The doctors tried to convince me that “interrupting the pregnancy” would be a good option. What they were telling me was that I should have an abortion because my baby was sick. I heard terms like “incompatible with life”, “stillbirth”, “deformaties”, “growth restriction” and “heart and brain malfunctions” and didn’t know how to make sense of them.
They said “interrupting the pregnancy” like it could be resumed, ya know? NO! It can’t be resumed. It could never be resumed.
I was bent on keeping my daughter as long as God allowed. And that lasted for 36 weeks. Her little heart stopped beating while I was at the doctors office getting a check up. I was due at the end of the month.
I was able to deliver her like I did all of my other children. Some think that is gross. I used to. But I also had the chance to be her mommy. I was able to hold her and kiss her. I got to see what her little face looked like and check out the cute little curls on her head. Had I aborted her, I would have never seen her. I wouldn’t have been able to hold her or kiss her goodbye.
It wasn’t something that I thought I would ever have to go thru. But I did. And I think I made the right choice.
I miss her a lot, but I know that she is in a much better place.
Remember, it’s never as bad as you think it is…
~C
I’m 16 years old and the youngest in my family.
I know I’m pregnant without a doubt and so does my boyfriend, but we haven’t told our parents just yet. We both want to wait and tell them. We know that we will go through a lot of family issues because my mom and his grandma had been telling us not to have any while we are still in school. Even though we slipped up and are expecting one anyways, I don’t look at it as a burden but a blessing. It’s just the way of telling our families that I really don’t know how to do.
Can someone give me any advice? My boyfriend is joining the military after he graduates, and I plan to still do my fashion no matter what because I believe nothing can ever stop your dreams if you’re really determined.
I am completely amazed right now…
I was thinking about how attached I already am to my daughter. I haven’t even seen her face to face, but the most contact I have had with her is seeing her on the ultrasound and when she will kick my hand and I’ll tap my tummy and she kicks me again. It’s almost like we are playing together. But anyways, I’m so like emotionally and spiritually attached to this little miracle inside of me it’s insane. I am so in love with my little angel; her and her dad are like my life. If you would have told me this was how I was going to feel about her when I first took that test and saw the two lines, I would have thought you were smoking something. Being pregnant is one of the most amazing times in any woman’s life. For me, honestly, this is the happiest I’ve ever been. But when I do get sad, there’s a little girl that kicks me right in the bladder. It’s almost like she’s saying, “Hey! Be happy! I’m here for you!” I am just completely amazed…
Peace And Love
I am 22 years old and I am pregnant with my second child.
I am a full-time student and will be graduating from college in May, and my baby is due July 31. My fiancé moved about an hour and a half away, and we have maintained a long-distance relationship, which was going on before we got pregnant. I am frustrated because ever since I became pregnant, he is always so busy or says he is too busy to talk or spend time. He convinced me this wouldn’t happen and he would always have time for me. In the last two weeks, we have not really spoken, and if we have, it has been very short and we accomplish nothing. He gets angry when I get upset about money and finances pertaining to our new baby and the move I will be making when I graduate.
I can’t understand his emotions, and I am starting to get fed up. I went as far as to change my number and only call him blocked for almost 2 weeks. Everytime we spoke, he would stress the issue of not having a number to reach me at, and how he couldn’t get a hold of me, if he needed to. I finally gave in and gave him my new number, and guess what, he hasn’t called my phone ONCE. I was confused if I wanted to keep this child, even though I knew it would be hard for me to have an abortion, but this is exactly what I didn’t want to happen. I feel like I am wearing a game face all day at school, and Not showing my true feelings.(and I hate it). I’m just so fed up.
I’m ready to raise this child myself.
I don’t have a story like some people on here.
I’m 24, in the army and have been for almost 7 years. My boyfriend is in the army also, and we are sooo excited about our newfound happiness!!!!
Hi, I just turned 17 in January. I have a boyfriend; we have been together for about a year and 5 months. My mother (single parent) is a strong, very religious Christian woman and I love her to death.
Last year, me and my boyfriend had unprotected sex and I never thought much of it. Months after, I was throwing up, constantly in the bathroom, and really strong pains in my stomach. Couple days after, I decided to take a pregnancy test and it came out positive. I was excited but really nervous. I didn’t know who to turn to. I called my boyfriend. He cried and said he was very happy. I spoke with his mom and she said she would talk to my mother and have me take 2 more pregnancy tests. That day came and both came out positive. When my boyfriend’s mom told my mom, my mom was in shock and started to cry. She said she never expected it out of me. My mom came in my room, gave me a hug, told me everything was going to be okay, and that she would take care of me.
My boyfriend’s father went crazy because he also had his first son at 16 and said I needed to get an abortion. I said no , I don’t believe in that and my mother said the same. About a week later, I went to my first OBGYN appointment at 12 pm and I was so happy everything was going fine. As soon as I saw the baby, I was smiling and it was the best feeling I ever had in my life, unexplainable. Then as the nurse started to look into the sonogram screen, her face just froze and she didn’t speak. My mom’s face also froze. I started asking what’s going on, what happened, is the baby okay. The nurse says “the baby isn’t in the right place,” we have to get you to the hospital immediately.” I didn’t understand, her explanation was so simple. She left the room and my mom tried to explain better. The doctor came in and also explained to me that everything was going to be okay and that my baby was stuck in my fallopian tube which is known as ectopic pregnancy.
I began to cry and scream. I couldn’t believe it. My doctor said if I would have waited one more day, I could have died. When I called my boyfriend to tell him everything, all he did was cry and cry and I just hung up the phone because I could not stop crying and kicking and punching walls. Ten minutes after and I was already at the hospital, waiting for my surgery. While all of this, I had so many visitors. I realized how many people actually supported and cared for me, I couldn’t believe it. I was actually feeling happy because of everybody coming in to pray and check on me. The doctors were very nice and caring. They told me they were going to try and save my tube. The next day, my boyfriend came to visit me at the hospital and everything was fine. After the surgery, I was in recovery for 2 weeks and I didn’t go to school, which later affected me.
I thought about that baby every day for months and still do. Even though I didn’t get an abortion, for some reason, that’s what it felt like. I am very thankful for God for giving me a chance to live. From this experience, I think I have become a stronger person. It was heartbreaking for me, for a lot of months. Now I have realized that I was not ready for a baby during these “teen years”. I now understand why my mom always says “you will have time to be a mother so don’t rush things.” I have a scar on my body for the rest of my life to remember that baby that never lived.
If you have any questions or anything to say, don’t be shy! Thanks for reading my story.
