I just feel completely empty- my world is wrapped around two dates:
- 15th March 2008, the day my child, my little baby was conceived.
- 1st July 2008, the day my little one was taken from me in the most un-natural way.
I have so much resentment towards my mother; I can’t forgive her. I can’t forgive myself. I keep asking myself the same questions:
- Why didn’t she support me like she always said she would?
- Why was I never allowed to see my own child?
- Would I have been such a bad mother?
- Why does she still till this day pretend anything happened?
These are the questions that will never be answered.
I know everyone tells me that my baby and God have forgiven me and I now need to forgive myself- but how can I? How can I forgive myself for not standing up to my mother, for not being the voice for my own child?
That’s all my life is now- emptiness, resentment and unanswered questions.
OK, here’s the thing.
I looked at the signs and symptoms of pregnancy earlier today and aside from 1 symptom, I have nearly all of them. I don’t know what to do. I have had scares before and everytime, it ends up false and I feel so stupid, so what do I do? I don’t want to get to the doctors and have them tell me…..again that I am not.
We are not actually trying either so I am really wondering what to do. *Confused*
Talk about a 360! I have been staying fast in my faith and praying enough for my baby’s heart and mine combined.
My boyfriend has really come around ; ) He rubs my belly every now and again and communicates with me about as much as he can. He has made a significant change. I agreed to marry him and I think that has a lot to do with it. I still struggle with the periodic baby blues now and again but a prayer and some sleep will take care of that.
As women, we can’t let people manipulate how we feel … We are strong individuals with something important to say, and nobody can take that from us. We have the gift of life and that is the most beautiful thing in the world! When my childhood comes to taint my thoughts, I try so hard to fight but sometimes it’s so hard or you don’t even notice it. I watch my belly grow and all that seems to go away— There is a little someone inside of me and they are going to need me to be strong and love them unconditionally. Have you ever gotten really mad at your spouse and you try and say whatever will hurt them the most in defense? We can’t do that anymore. Our eyes have to be wide open with acceptance and compassion. Trying to be the best mommy!
What do you think????
Everyone says you’re supposed to live life to the fullest without regret…
I had the “perfect” life. I was a small town girl with my “country boy” who I thought was the love of my life… I was living life to the fullest and had absolutely no regrets until March 11… On February 24, I found out I was pregnant. I was devastated and scared. I didn’t know what to do what to say or even what to think… I was so confused and so selfish!!! So my boyfriend and I decided that we wanted to stay in school and go to college and then settle down and have a family… So I called made the appointment and was already and set to go…
When the day came, I wanted so bad to back out and just run out of that place screaming and running for my baby’s life…but I didn’t because I was so selfish and scared and was only thinking about my life… As I went down the stairs to the room, my heart started racing faster and faster and pounding harder and harder. I felt so sick to my stomach… I layed down on that table and cryed and cryed the whole 5 minutes it took to abort my baby, my own flesh and blood… Afterwards, I was so sick. I kept throwing up more and more and crying hysterically… I was depressed and so ashamed of myself I couldn’t even go to a church. I couldn’t pray or even wear my cross necklace. I felt I didn’t deserve it… I didn’t deserve anything ever again that was good… I let my poor baby down because I was so selfish…
I was depressed for a long time but I started to get back into church and it got easier but it never left my mind. That night always played over and over again in my head… And now I’m 17 and I was still with the same guy that got me pregnant the first time and here once again, I’m pregnant… The word abortion never crossed my mind at all. I was and still am determined to have this baby… I’m single now because the “father” left me because there was no way in hell I was giving up a second child… God gave me another chance at this and I’m not gonna let this baby down…
And from now on, my baby boy and I are living life to its fullest and with no regrets…
About a week and a half ago, I found out I was pregnant.
Since then, I have changed and rechanged my mind on what to do,
Besides the fact I just got out of a course that can get me killer jobs using forklifts, working in confined spaces, heights over 10ft, chemicals, and a bunch of other stuff, I just got kicked out of actual school, being as it was already a continuing ed school. I don’t exactly have many more options, so now I’m a pregnant high school dropout who is pregnant … life is grand, ain’t it? Anyways, just to throw it out there… I am 99.9% sure it is not my boyfriend’s kid…
So? What should I do? Move away and keep it, go back to school in a new town and get a part-time job and save every penny, or stay in my town … tell my father, have him flip a lid, and probably have know where to live or move in with my friends? I’m so confused. I have no idea what to do? Someone talk, please?
Hi everybody, I’m 17 years old.
I was 16 when I found out I was pregnant and me and my bf wasn’t together. He was with another girl but now we’re back together. I’m having a baby girl. Her name’s going to be Ebony-lee. I go in on August the 4th I think.
That’s all I need 2 say for now ok bye.
