I looked up on google.com to find a website about teen pregnancy and came about standupgirl.com and thought I would blog this to see if anyone could help me.
I’m a 16-year-old jr. in high school that has a lot of problems with my mom. And I was told by my school counselor that if it gets too bad, just to walk out and go to the cops. On a Sunday night at 10:30, I did just that and went to the cops. And now I’m in the group home. I have been suicidal (on and off) for about 5 years now, and I have tried everything. And now that I’m out of the house away from my mom, I feel depressed and alone and I’m afraid that I might get suicidal again. Last year my boyfriend of 7 months, took my v-card and I ended up pregnant but lost it a month later, and not a lot of people know that I was. And now that I know that was pregnant that I would not even THINK about going depressed like I was again. So now I’m thinking that I want to get pregnant. but I don’t know if it is a good idea or not. I see this as the only way. I need someone to love me and want me and I know I won’t get rid of it no matter what. I’m so confused.
PLEASE HELP ME!
I’m 15 + I had an abortion last October and I regretted it so badly.
I was pushed into it by my boyfriend. He said he would leave me and I’d be a single mum if I never got rid of it. It was hard as well because my mum was evicted from our house earlier on that year so I was living with my boyfriend as well and if I kept the baby, I would have nowhere to live either. I was so scared. I was 14 weeks at 2 days pregnant when I had the abortion. When I came home, my boyfriend supported me but after a couple of days, it was like it never even happened. He was normal and we started arguing a lot. Then the next month he split up with me, so I lost him either way, but I still lived with him and we were still having sex. It was like we never even broke up but we didn’t class each other as partners.
Then a couple of months later, he slept with a different girl and I was heartbroken. He said that she got on top of him an forced him, but when I spoke to her, she told me that she did persuade him to do it, but it wasn’t just her in control.
He still tells me that till this day but we got over that. As I was living with him, I couldn’t leave him because I’d have nowhere to go. Even though I really wanted to go, I had to stay there and act like everything was fine. A couple of months later, I slept round his mate’s house and got really drunk and ended up sleeping with him. Then it went on for longer until I realized it was wrong and I was only doing it to give my ex-boyfriend the pain i felt for all this time. So I came clean and told him what happened between us.
Now a year down the line, we are still the same. I’m 16 next month and pregnant with his baby again. We are keeping the baby this time as I told him that I will not get rid of it again and he said he understood and wishes he never made me do it last time. He said he has grown up now, but our relationship still hasn’t changed. We still ain’t together but if we went with someone else, it would be classed as cheating and at the moment, I have this weird idea in my head that he is seeing someone else. I don’t know why I think it. He keeps telling me I’m been stupid an he makes me believe him for a while. Then I start to think it again. Could it be just me thinking like that cause I’m pregnant?
I’m Really scared. I’m not sure if I’m making the right decision, but I know if I had another abortion, it would kill me.
I’m so happy. I’m 9 weeks pregnant. Can’t wait to hold my baby in my arms.
I haven’t told my parents yet, I’m scared. But my boyfriend, he is very supportive. Currently studying at university, this is my last year so I’m planning to tell them after my exams. I know they will be disappointed, but at least I have achieved one thing. I know my mom will handle the news well. I’m more worried about my dad, but when the time comes, they will accept. I sometimes feel the pressure that I’m lying to them coz clearly, my mom will feel a bit betrayed that I as her daughter don’t trust her enough.
I feel that if I tell her, I will feel relieved and stop stressing coz I can’t sleep at night the more the days go on and on. It becomes too much.
Ok, where do I start? How do I put into words the feeling? How do I sum up the worst day of my life on a blog?
I’m not sure if the answer I have…….. I was so happy and everything was going so well, and then it all changed, and what hurts is it wasn’t a quick change. It was a slow and painful change.
I was about 9 weeks and my boyfriend started to have his 2nd episode of psychosis and it was hard. He wouldn’t come near me. He would abuse me and wrestle me to the ground to get the car keys off me so he could try and kill himself… It was hard. I know he didn’t know what he was doing and he is sorry for it now… Whilst all that was going on, my older sister was being horrible and so was her boyfriend… I lived with my mum and there were too many people in the house… There was my mum, her boyfriend, me, my boyfriend, my little sister, my older sister, and her boyfriend all in a 3-bedroom home… It was too much…. On the 20th of August, early in the morning, about a week into A’s troubles and years of dealing with a drug addict sister, I woke up in terrible pain and I didn’t know what to do. So I rung up my friend and she took me straight to the hospital and they did an ultrasound and said they couldn’t find a heartbeat…. I don’t think I have ever felt a feeling of hurt that bad. I burst into tears. I got so hysterical the doctors had to sedate me… I don’t remember much as I was in and out of sleep and crying… It was all a big blur… I spoke to the doctors the next day and they asked me what was going on and everything and I told them all about my troubles and they said I must have miscarried due to stress….. I felt like a failure, like it was my fault, that I had let all of these bad things get to me and that I had killed my baby…. It has taken me a little while to pluck up the courage to write this blog, but it’s making me feel a little bit better just letting it all out…
I only recently took another pregnancy test and it came as a faint positive so I’m going to get that checked out…..
But understand I am NOT trying to replace my baby… I will NEVER forget my baby. All I am trying to do is have a family with the one I love and it’s been very hard but I know I can get through all of the smokey haze, that is bad things, and see the little ray of sunshine that is my future……
R.I.P my little angel….. God gave you wings before I got to give you a cuddle….. We will meet up in heaven xxxxxx
Well, I feel it’s time to take off what I had written on the front page of my blog… It’s been hard, but I know that my little angel would want me to try and move on… This is what I had written………….
Well, I just found out 2 days ago that I’m PREGNANT!! And today the 4/7 (I’m in Australia so it looks different to some lol), I am 4 weeks pregnant. I’m sooooo excited. I can’t wait to meet my little one… I want the next 36 weeks to hurry up and come lol
I haven’t been on here in a while… I lost my baby on the 20th of August…. I was nearly 11 weeks… It has been really hard and I’m still trying to heal… I will always love my little angel and we will meet in heaven. It is a long story as to what happened and I’m not ready yet to say it all.
R.I.P my little baby. Mummy and daddy love you very, very much xxxx…………. It’s really hard for me to read the first part because I remember writing it so vividly and the feelings I was feeling then.
I am going to try and move on, but I will NEVER forget my baby.
I’m having a beautiful baby boy! Braxton is due March 2 and I just can’t wait. I love my baby boy more than anything, and I don’t even know him. Him and his daddy are the loves of my life. (:
