oh im sorry to hear your loss.. i havent been there but surely, at this point of times you need GOD, he is just waiting for you to talk to him. we are also here for you, wherever we are, we could always help one another, we could always make every one feels relieve from their pains and sorrows! i know its so hard what you have been going through but god will forgive you, let him guide you through your life and ask forgiveness for what had happened. HE WILL ALWAYS LISTEN.. Take care! i hope you’ll be feeling better..
much love, nelle!