I have to begin by saying I am so impressed by what the creators of this website and organization are trying to accomplish. I support your work 100% because I truly believe that this is a key part of the fight against abortion. I have no intention of undermining the agonizing situations that each and every girl is faced with.
What I’m trying to understand is how we can begin to teach our young women that the choice comes at the time of the sexual act. I’ve spent hours this evening reading story after story and despite the unique specifics there are so many similarities: “surprised I was pregnant” “couldn’t believe I was pregnant again” “found myself in the same situation again” “already had children out of wedlock”. When are we going to realize that pregnancy is NEVER a surprise?! I am the mother of 4 children and each and every one of them had been planned simply by virtue of the fact that my husband and I chose to have sex. It’s really that simple! The inevitable result of sexual intercourse is pregnancy. The biggest disservice that parents, school systems, and the medical profession does to young girls and women is propagate the lie that somehow contraception of any kind will keep them from getting pregnant.
Fellow women, please, I beg you, stop being a pawn in our own lives. By giving in to the pressures to become and remain sexually active before we are in a committed, married relationship, we are allowing ourselves to become beholden to a relationship that is artificial, incomplete, and in so many cases, will in a single moment of pleasure, lead us to make complicated and heart wrenching decisions. I speak from experience, and it is so hard to describe because I didn’t even fully understand it until I experienced marital love, and the unsurpassable joy that comes from the union of husband and wife. While I never actually had to make the decision, there were plenty of times that I thought I might have to–although for me it would have never been an option, because the reality was that I knew in my heart that pregnancy was always a possibility.
Remember what the blessed Mother Theresa warns us about: “It is a poverty to decide that a child must die so that you may live as you wish.” She loves you and so do I!
I understand that getting pregnant is truly a sincere mistake. It was for me but, it is something that I am going to have to live with for the rest of my life.
The only thing one can do about it is don’t let it stop your dreams. I know because I have to be alone through my pregnancy and after. My boyfriend is deploying to Afghanistan in a few months. I am terrified that he won’t come back and I will be alone raising a kid. It is bad enough I am going to have to deliver it without him by my side. I am going to try to make the best of it and remember that many other people have it worse than I do. I guess all we can do is have hope and believe that things happen for a reason.
If anyone has any questions or needs some advice let me know. I am more than happy to help.
“Grown-ups never understand anything for themselves, and it is tiresome for children to be always and forever explaining things to them.” Antoine de Saint-Exupery, “The Little Prince”, 1943 French writer (1900 – 1944)
It feels like just a few days ago I was fretting over how to tell everyone I was pregnant. When I first found out, I panicked. I mean, how could I not? I was 18, living in a strange city about 300 miles away from any family. It is weird because now I look back and I wonder, “What in the world?” I’m not a religious nut, but I do believe in God. I don’t know if I would have been able to get through everything if I didn’t.
It’s one of the hardest things, telling the people who you look up to you are pregnant. It is even harder to tell someone who you want to be proud of you. I never really understood why my sister tried to hide her first pregnancy from our mom; at least I didn’t till I became pregnant. Then everything changed. I felt like I had done something wrong; that I needed to hide. Looking back, I realize that I was scared. I could barely take care of myself, let alone a little one.
Now that little one is six almost seven months old and learning to crawl. She spends most of her time laughing and trying to get into things. I wouldn’t change it for the world.
When you are pregnant, things can seem out of your control. Even when you are not pregnant, they seem out of control. So take my advice, step back, take a deep breath, and imagine the smile on your future son or daughter’s face. Try to imagine a love so strong you wouldn’t believe it existed. Trust me. When and if you decide to have that little one, you will be taken aback by how strong it is.
Heyy everyone!
I need some advice. I’m 2 months pregnant today! And I told my mum and dad. They were the first people I told then I told my boyfriend and me and him are so happy about the news!
My mum and dad said they were too & they acted happy about it too.
Maybe it was all too good to be true! Which it was.
I overheard my mum and dad talking in the living room saying that she should have an abortion again bcoz this is a massive mistake.
And I feel so lost again. I had a abortion 7 months and 3 weeks ago this Monday 23/3 bcoz they both made me! And now I feel they won’t me to go through all that all over again. Me and my boyfriend didn’t want to the first time and we deffo don’t want to do it again it was a massive mistk and I don’t know what to do. I want to keep my baby and I don’t want him/ or her to be taken off me. It would crush me
Any advice?
How do I stand up to them though?
And why can’t they just be happy with my choice?
HELP please, any advice?
Thank you!!! xxxx
January 3rd was the day I crashed.
It was the day of my abortion. Before that, when I was figuring out what I was going to do, I said I wanted to keep it but then everybody kept telling me to get an abortion, that I should get rid of it. I felt everybody looking at me with disgrace; my mom, my dad, my brothers. I know I am very young (14), but I think every girl has their choice. I went through with the abortion. After I walked out of the office, I cried so much. I came home with really bad cramps. When I walked out of the office, I just thought to myself what the hell did I just do? I lay in my bed crying, trying to go to sleep so I could sleep off the pain from the cramps and the pain of knowing what I did. I wish I never did that.
I wish I could go back in time and take back what I did. I was 9 weeks and 2 days. I think about it all the time, wondering if it was going to be a girl or a boy, what I would have named him or her, what he or she would look like, how their smile would be their laugh their cry, how they would look like sleeping. I think about it day and night even still now. I’m hurting so much. It’s like a part of myself died like there’s a part of myself missing but I can’t get it back. I have flashbacks of when I sat up and saw the blood on the table and as I walked out of the office, so many tears fell down my face and breaks my heart in half.
To those girls who are figuring out what they’re going to do, think about how you’re going to feel after it works. I don’t know if this will change your mind but I’m just telling my story…
**I’m sorry that I never gave you a chance.
I’m sorry I did this to you.
I understand if you hate me.
But I just want you to know that I love you with all my heart and I am sorry.
There might be a possibility that I’m pregnant.
I don’t know what’s going on. I want a baby, to be honest.
Me and my boyfriend plan on getting married and having kids just not now. We have the 5-year plan.
I thought having this would help me like get my feelings out.
I want a baby though, but I’m still in school and I would miss his or her childhood 🙁
So we’ll see what happens.
