I got pregnant when I was 17 by a guy I hardly knew. Two weeks after I found out about my baby, he left and I haven’t seen him since.
I eventually started dating a wonderful guy when I was 4 months pregnant. We were together for a year, then things unfortunately didn’t work out. My pregnancy was full of tears, doubt, joy, and fear. My parents wanted me to get an abortion “to help my future because I was setting myself up for failure by having a baby.” I researched all my options. I looked at the abortion clinic websites and every time I opened it, I felt sick and knew that wasn’t right for me. I then researched adoption profiles on the Bethany website, but just knew that wasn’t right for me either. So I knew that God intended me to keep this baby because she needed her mommy as much as her mommy needed her!
I had my daughter Cadence on July 31st. She weighed 6 lbs. 5 oz. She is eight months old now and recently learned to crawl. She is saying baba, mama, dada and said Hi once! Everytime she smiles, I can’t help but smile too! She makes every day worth living! It amazes me that this little person is completely dependent on me for her very life! When she holds my hand, I feel like nothing can ever go wrong! I have a living angel in my arms every night and thank God that she is here with me! I don’t know where I’d be without her!
Oh and by the way! I finished school and graduated before my graduating class did! My daughter gave me more motivation that anyone ever could! I will be attending college next winter and studying to become a biotechnology technician! So there’s to everyone that told me I couldn’t do it! There’s to everyone who said I was going to fail in life and there’s to everyone who judged me and every other young mother just for having a blessing! Just because I had a baby doesn’t mean I’m stupid!
Anyways, enough ranting for tonight!
Goodnight!
Love
Just before Easter, an amazing thing happened. I lost my baby to abortion many years ago. The father and I had a brief romance and afterward became friends. I never told him about the pregnancy, and for years I felt a terrible guilt. Of course I felt guilty for my own decision, but I also felt bad that I never gave him the chance to convince me otherwise. I just assumed, and acted on that assumption. I moved away from where I lived and lost contact with him for many years. I always wondered if we’d ever meet again. I’ve prayed often over the years for healing and for peace of mind. Well, long story short, we’ve become aquainted again! It’s so amazing! Even though we will never revisit the relationship we once had, we now have the chance to become friends again. I can’t describe how healing it is, just to have this chance. I have often fantasized about a time machine, that I would have a second chance to do things differently. (Two of my favorite stories are “A Christmas Carol” and “Its a Wonderful Life.”) I feel that although God wasn’t about to give me a handy time machine, this meeting has given me the equivalent of a second chance. For the first time, I was able to talk to my unborn child in heaven. I usually just talk to God and tell him to tell her I’m sorry. But I was finally able to say, “Baby, I found your daddy.” I hope that I can make her proud of me. I want her to know that she didn’t die in vain. I repented of my selfishness. I don’t know if I can ever do enough to make up for the past, but I try. There is hope after the fact. Painful as it is, life does go on and sometimes God says, “Well, let me give you this little nugget of goodness and see what you do with it.” Thank you, God.
Okay, I have just this one quiz,
Could you still be prego and have your period?? Cuz when my sis was prego with her baby, she had her normal periods… Okay. Last week, I started my period but it isn’t the usual period. I started very early than the rest of the time… But this time, I had really bad cramps… But it was heavy the first day. Then the next day, it came out very light, like spotting…. And I don’t know, I’m scared… I know I’m a very young girl, but for realz, I do want a baby… Me and my boyfriend have already talked it out. We even talked it out with his mom and she said that it is up to us…. I don’t know why I want a baby so badly, but I just do… But the funny thing is that me and my boyfriend always do it unprotected and I have never gotten prego… But my sis only did it once unprotected and she got prego right away… Is something wrong with me or him? All I know is that I want to be prego… Me and my boyfriend want to have a family…. I know we are young but we know what we are doing… So I’m hoping I am prego. If not, we will talk about trying it…
Just need some good advice from someone… I need help… = )
So about a month ago, me and my really good friend “hooked up”, if you wanna call it that…
I’m scared… I really like him. He says he really likes me. I’m scared, I don’t know. I don’t wanna let someone into my life again and get hurt… I’m so scared. It’s happened too many times. But that day, we had sex, and well, the condom fell off… Me and his mom are going in to get me tested… He and his mom really want the baby, but I’m too scared to tell my mom, who is bipolar, and stepdad, who is an alcoholic… Right now, my really good friend is in rehab for 4 months… I talked to him for the 1st time last night… I get to talk to him tonight, YAYYYY. But I’m scared this whole thing will ruin our friendship…
What do I do on all of this?!?!?!?! HELP
I’d been with my, now, ex-boyfriend since my senior year of high school. I got pregnant near the end of the relationship, when we were seeing each other on and off.
It wasn’t until we’d broken up for good that I realized I was pregnant. I told him soon after and from the start, he denied being the father and said he wasn’t ready for another kid. We were texting one another when I told him because he refused to answer my calls. I remember I got angry and told him, “Fine, I’ll take care of it!” Meaning, I would raise her as a single mom. I have to admit, abortion came to mind when he denied her because I had just lost my job and now my baby would have no father. However, I knew I could never go through with it. Apparently, he thought I meant I was going to get an abortion. At which point, he started saying it was “his baby too,” and I couldn’t make that decision by myself, I was being selfish, etc, etc. Basically, everything he could think of to make me feel bad. After that, we didn’t speak again.
I was scared to tell my family. I knew they would be disappointed in me, but I was also afraid they’d be angry with me. Being that I’d just been laid off and had no means to raise a baby. So I went on with life like I wasn’t pregnant. Nobody noticed a thing, until about 7 months. My tummy had kinda started to show and it was my sister who noticed. She asked me and at first I denied it, but she broke me. I told her and first thing she asked was if I had been to a doctor. Until then, I hadn’t. I was in denial. She broke the news to my mom about me being pregnant and my ex denying it was his. My mom was surprisingly happy, but angry about my ex.
Shortly after, I made my first doctor’s appointment. I went by myself and had to talk to a midwife/counselor because of all the bottled up feelings I had inside. They were scared I might get depressed, which would hurt the baby. Plus, all the crying and hurt I had held inside all those months wasn’t any good for the baby either. I don’t think I’ve ever cried so hard before. Until then, I’d pretty much cried myself to sleep every night. This was supposed to be a happy time for me, having my first child, but it was filled with a lot of hurt. My next appointment, I went with my sister and found out I was having a GIRL! It broke my heart, in a good way, to see this little life inside of me. I gave birth to Maliea Tanae on July 23. Surprisingly, my labor was easy. Thank God, lol. Anyways, as by tradition, my mom and I went to my ex’s house to tell his family he had fathered a baby. He finally came out of his room and after some time, finally held her. He wanted to go outside to talk, so we did. One of the first things he told me was, “I know she’s mine. We don’t need a paternity test.” He also told me he was going to take care of her and support, but I knew from past experience seeing is the only way I was believing. I didn’t get my hopes up and good thing I didn’t because to date, he hasn’t done anything for her.
I still wanted my daughter to be able to be a part of the other side of her family, so I let her stay with them for a bit. He was never really home anymore because he was always out partying. I guess smoking and drinking come first. But anyways, when he finally did come home, he was angry to find her there. He started sending angry messages saying I was a bad mom, I shouldn’t have had her if I was gonna leave her like that, etc, etc. It hurt, but at the same time I knew he was saying it to make himself feel better. Now, my daughter is almost 8 1/2 months old. She doesn’t know her biological father and she probably never will and not by my choice, but his. Instead, she knows another man as “daddy.” I met a wonderful man who has accepted my daughter and I. He is now my husband and I’m expecting again. Haven’t had my first appointment yet, but I’ll keep you posted.
I no longer think of my ex and what life would be like or let what he says get to me. I know what I’m doing what I have to do to raise my wonderful daughter. So all I want to say is, even though times get tough, God has a plan for you. Things happen for a reason. I’m living proof of that.
I lost my baby boy a few years ago and now, I want a baby more than ever. xx
