I had a miscarriage 2 years ago… & it’s been the hardest thing I ever had to deal with…
I’m still TRYING to get over it now…I’ve been doing well for a while until my foster sister had a baby… Every single time I see that little girl, I get so upset. But at the same time, I’m always holding her and changing her… I even felt a little weird for wishing she was mine. This is bringing up old pain…
Idk what to do.
Wow! Seems like I’ve been gone forever.
Life has been so hectic…My boyfriend and I are doing very well. Well, we were until he found out that I was considering going to the army. He’s very upset and doesn’t want me to go. I’m confused. I love him, but I also need to think of my future… The whole situation just sucks. He asked me to marry him and stay, but to be completely honest, I’m terrified of that. Yes, I love him and would love to spend the rest of my life with him. But I’m afraid that I’ll find a way to mess things up, especially since I’m not quite ready for marriage yet… He even tried to get me pregnant so that I couldn’t go to the army… That really almost broke us up. He knew how hard it was for me to get over the miscarriage of my and my ex-boyfriend’s baby. But he sincerely apologized and worked to gain my trust back.
I just don’t know what to do…
Losing a child is the most painful thing I could have ever imagined…
How could I be such a horrible mother before my child even got the chance to be born? How could I not be more careful? I know it’s my fault & I feel so terrible… I was planning on being the best mommy possible for you. I failed before the challenge even began…
I love you and I wish we had more time together: time to bond, time to love each other, time to become a family…
