Wow! Seems like I’ve been gone forever. Life has been so hectic…My boyfriend (Dewayne) and I are doing very well. Well we were until he found out that I was considering going to the army. He’s very upset and doesn’t want me to go. I’m confused. I love him, but I also need to think of my future… The whole situation just sucks. He asked me to marry him and stay, but to be completely honest, I’m terrified of that. Yes, I love him and would love to spend the rest of my life with him. But I’m afraid that I’ll find a way to mess things up, especially since I’m not quite ready for marriage yet.. He even tried to get me pregnant so that I couldn’t go to the army.. That really almost broke us up after he know how hard it was to get over the miscarriage of me and my ex boyfriend’s baby. But he sincerely apologized and worked to gain my trust back. I just don’t know what to do..