Two days ago, I told my parents that I am pregnant at 17. They kicked me out and I am living with my boyfriend’s family now.
It hurt so bad when I told them. My dad screamed at us. He told me to get rid of it and when I said no, he told me to get out. My mum tried to make him calm down, but it didn’t work. I got angry at him then I told him that at least I will be nice enough to my kid if I keep it to not kick them out if they were pregnant. I had already packed my bags because I knew they would kick me out. So I left that night I left them a letter saying how much I loved them and how sorry I was and I left a picture of my ultrasound as well with the sentence “This is the grandchild you just kicked out”. I felt so depressed I could barely eat the first day but then I told myself that I had to eat for the baby so I am. I still don’t know what I am going to do with the baby later, but if I give it up, it will be an open adoption. I will not abandon my baby like that. The worst part of this is the looks I get when people see me like I am a freak, but I must keep strong.
Byes
Every year on this day, I take a moment and sadness sets in. I do love my life and think I have been blessed by GOD with a wonderful understanding husband and 3 amazing kids.
However, today is the day that my first daughter passed away. She would be 7 today, and things would be a lot different I think. She was a stillborn, and we had no idea until I went in for my ultrasound and found out she had passed away 3 days earlier.
I often wonder who she would look like and what she would be like. As a mother, I miss her every day.
I don’t think having kids and being there everyday makes you a mother. I think being pregnant, for however short or long a time, makes you a mother and that instinct just kicks in as to always do what’s best for your baby no matter what the choice a woman makes is. She always does what’s best for her baby, and I think what could have been done to prevent this from happening?
Even though the doctors say it just happens sometimes with no warning, it still upsets me and makes me think I failed as her mother. I know that if she were here with us today, I would not have my little boy and girl or this new little bun in the oven, and Lord knows I love them with all my heart, I still think about how things would be with her. I know how hard it is for all these young women to deal with the pressure of being pregnant so young and having to make tough choices and it makes me so sad.
I just wish all these girls that have ever been done wrong or pressured into making a choice they didn’t want to could rise up and change what has happened to them as I wish I could change what happened to my baby. I have to think like most people do there’s a reason for all things, right or wrong. No matter how much sense they do or don’t make. I just wish I could change things. I will always remember Annette Mckenzie born May 21st, 2003. I loved her from the moment I knew she and I were sharing a body and I look forward to seeing her again one day.
I came on this website to talk to anyone who’s had an abortion…
If you regretted it… If you’ve had a baby since then… I had an abortion in February this year… I regret it so much I feel so selfish. I only did it cause I was so scared. Scared of actually having a baby and scared of what my mum would think of me.
I think about it everyday, cry about it nearly everyday. My boyfriend & I talk about it everyday. What were we thinking? Neither of us know. We’re thinking about trying again for another baby, but is that right? I just wish there was a rewind button. I want my baby back 🙁
I need help.
I’ve just found out I’m pregnant with my boyfriend whom I love completely, I was devastated. The problem is he’s Indian, His parents are planning on him getting an arranged marriage next year and we’ve always known this. He says no matter what I do, he will support me, but I know that if I carry on with this pregnancy, his whole family will disown him. I’ll rip his life apart and he’ll be left with nothing. I love him sooo much and I can’t bear to do this to him. So I’ve told him and my dad I’ll have an abortion. My dad thinks it’s the best option, my partner hates himself for me going through all this, and I’m so torn. I know I can’t have this baby, it would cause too much heartache, but the idea of a termination is killing me 🙁 I don’t know what to do. I don’t even know if I’ll be strong enough to cope with all this. I really wish I could talk to my mum about it but it is better she doesn’t know.
I’m 17 years old.
About a month ago, I found out that I am pregnant. 9 weeks this week. (19 May). My boyfriend is 20 years old & we’ve been together for nearly a year. As soon as I thought I was pregnant, I went straight to my mom & told her. We have a very close relationship & thank God that we do. Otherwise, I’d have no idea how I would tell her. I also told my boyfriend. We bought a home pregnancy test & did it together. It came out negative. I was very confused because my period was 2 weeks late by then. A week later, my mom bought me another test, supposed to be the best home pregnancy test out there & my mom, my boyfriend & I did the test & it again. Came out negative. Still, we were all very confused with no period. My mom & I went to the clinic a few days later & they did a test & straight away it said positive. The three of us sat down & spoke about what was going to happen. Our first agreement was to have an abortion. It all happened so fast that I didn’t even have time to think about what i was really about to do. We went to the clinic the next day & they said that I’m too early to have an abortion, I have to be at least 9 weeks. Of course now having this time to actually let it set n has started to change my mind.
This decision is eating me away. My family have said that they are behind me all the way no matter what my decision is, but my boyfriend doesn’t want to keep this baby. He says he doesn’t want his child to grow up the same way he did. He lived with his uncle & then grandparents until he matriculated. He’s just concerned that we are not financially stable to have this baby, which is understandable. Neither is my mom. She’s a single mom even though my sister & I are grown up. My sister’s 21. I just cant imagine doing this to my baby & to myself. I do not go to school, due to personal reasons to do with step father not paying school fees so i do not have my matric certificate. Which we have made a plan to work around. I was working, but at the moment I’m jobless, besides working for my mom. My plan is to go & do my hair care & cosmetology course next year.
I’m in such a difficult position & just wish this could get easier.
I’d really appreciate any advise. Or help.
(:
It was November 24th. I was 16, and I was out at my friends after exams party,
I was talking to my ex-boyfriend and he said to me, “I have never stopped liking you and I will always love you, you mean the world to me.” At this point, I had a few drinks, so of course, I believed him. I hugged him and told him that I still loved him.
My friends saw me hugging him and pulled me aside and made me remember why we broke up in the first place. (He cheated on me for the whole 10 months we were going out). I remember I wanted to hit him. I walked up to him. He could tell I was angry and I was determined to do it, but he gave me the same look as he used to. It made me melt and remember how happy I was with him. Instead of hitting him, I kissed him and told him I missed him.
After that, I spent the whole night with him. I wouldn’t leave his side. I looked at the time and saw it was 3:20 am and I told mum i would be home by 4am at the latest. I told him that I had to go. He offered to walk me home because he didn’t want me to walk alone. At this point, I was quite drunk and accepted his offer.
I remember walking and spinning around, then I fell. He came over to me. I thought he was going to help me up, but instead he pined me down and wouldn’t let me go. I knew what he wanted and I said no. He got off me although he was angry. We walked in silence for over an hour. I started to feel bad for him, he looked so upset. I looked at him and he looked back at me. We stopped walking. I asked if he was okay and he said, “No, I can’t even have the girl I love.” I remember seeing tears in his eye and he looked down to the ground. I cried and told him that he could have had me, but he hurt me. Then we fought about it. He pushed me and said that he only did it because I didn’t want to have sex with him so i asked him if that was all he wanted from me then he yelled out “NO” as loud as he could and started crying. He sat down with his hands over his eyes. I sat next to him and hugged him. I thought that it was my fault so I thought it would make it better if I gave him what he wanted…. I told him that I would…
It had been 3 weeks since we had sex. We became closer to each other. It didn’t feel like it had been 3 weeks and I remembered that I was suppose to get my period 2 weeks ago. I got worried and told him about it. We went to buy 2 pregnancy tests that day. I told him I would do them at home once he had gone and when my parents were out. It was 5:30ish when he left. My parents were out doing the shopping so I drank about 2 liters of water and took the test… It came up positive… I drank more water and did the other one to make sure…. it came up positive as well. I started to freak out. I wanted to call him, so I did. He asked what the results were, I got scared and said negative… He sounded so relieved. I thought what I was doing was the right thing…. Then I had to think it through. There were so many questions in my head like “Can I keep it?” “What would I tell?” “Can I afford it?” “What can I do?” What should I do?”
I went to the G.P soon after I decided that getting an abortion would be the best option because I couldn’t afford it. I had to finish my education. I was way too young. The G.P asked if I was sure I wanted to do it. I remember my head shouting “NO!” yet the word yes came out of my mouth. I went though with it.
It took me a month to tell him that it really came up positive, and that I got an abortion. I was surprised he didn’t get angry or upset at me. All he said was “In a way, I wish that you did tell me, but I am happy you didn’t because i wouldn’t of been able to handle it” that made me cry because I thought about how I was handling it and I couldn’t think of how.
Now its May 19th. I am back in school i am still 16. He and I have broken up and I still regret having that abortion. My baby would have been due in August… I don’t know how I am going to get though that month with a smile on my face knowing that I could have had my baby in my arms…
