I have an appointment with my OB on the 21st to hear my babies heartbeat for the first time!!! I am sooo excited!!
And I was wondering… Do any of y’all have/had bad dreams during pregnancy?? Because last night, I had a dream I was bleeding… a lot & thought I was having a miscarriage. I know it was just a dream… but I keep having all these crazy dreams when I NEVER had dreams before.
Help?
I recently had an abortion, in January… Just in time before year 12 started up and classmates would notice….(how convenient).
My partner and I have been together for a while, and since the abortion, I have resented him and our parents. Every time, I go to the shops, look at magazines, hear of others having babies. It’s almost as though a part of me has gone. Well, it has and that will be forever. I never wanted to have the abortion, yet my partner and his mum pressured me so much that I felt I had no other decision. He promised he’d be there whenever I was sad…. Let me tell you, he’s not… He simply sits there and goes off into another world. It is all swept under the rug. I feel so lonely and guilty…
Is this normal?? What do I do now??
I was talking to my boyfriend this morning- like I do all the time. This time was a little different, a lot different.
He says he wants his children to call me mummy. He says he can’t wait to start a family with me. He says together forever. He says he will never leave me. He says he’s scared. He says he doesn’t want to get me pregnant just for my mum to force me into another abortion. But he says he wants to start a family with me more than anything.
He says I’m not the same. He says when we got together, I was really happy, outgoing, always wanted to go out. He says when I discovered I was pregnant, I was over the moon. He says he’s never seen me happier. He says now I’m always down, I’m always sad, I never want to go out, I pushed myself away from my friends, i won’t get close to the girls at college.
For a brief moment, I saw what I was turning into from an outside view. I was isolating myself from everyone and everything, and I still am. I try to pull him closer- begging him to never leave me. What am I doing?!
He says he thinks i might be depressed. I asked him what i should do. He said its up to me.
But how I am I meant to know what to do? I was going to see a counsellor but now I don’t want to- I don’t want to pour my heart out to someone for them to judge me.
I don’t want to go to the doctor’s, incase they say I am depressed.
I just want to curl up into a ball and cry. But at the same time, I want to be the girl he fell in love with, the happy, outgoing girl that has disappeared and no matter how much I search for her, I can’t find her. She has gone. But where?! Surely she’s got to here somewhere?
Hey guys,
My first blog!!!! I stumbled across SUG by accident when I was Googling pregnancy sympthoms, oh I as ya can see I can’t spell!!!!
Story so far:
I’m 24 years old and due to be married next year!!! I have very irregular periods, like once every 6ish months, the last being in December!!! My family has a long history of infertility!!!
Well 2 weeks ago, myself and my fiancé got a little bit carried away and now we think there is a possibility of me being pregnant. Over the past week or so I’ve been getting mild crampy abdo pain, I’m bloated, Nausea, increased wind, and I’ve noticed a lot of Montgomery’s Tubercles around my nipples so maybe I might be!!!
To be honest, I think I’d be more disappointed if I wasn’t pregnant than if I am, given my family history!!!
The only problem I have is how soon do I take a test? All the advice says take one when your period is late but as my periods are practically non existant, I have no idea when to take one!!!! I got a bit carried away in November and ended up taking like 7!!!! Now when I look back, I didn’t have any signs of being pregnant but we were trying for a baby and was a little bit clueless!!!!!
If anyone has any advice I appreciate it!!!!
Thanks, keep safe!!!!
My little girl surprised me 2 weeks early on 4/25 when my water broke.
I was in labour for 15 hours and after pushing for 3 hours, I had to get a c-section (my pelvic bones were just too narrow). So at 9:14pm, my daughter LillieAuna Briella was born. She was 6lbs 8ozs and 20.5in long. Her apgar score was 9. She is extremely healthy and such a good baby. After 2 days in the hospital, when I was released, we came home. She is so amazing I can hardly stop looking at her.
I thank God everyday for the amazing gift He gave me.
My story, not the short version, the long version. The version no-one knows except my boyfriend. So here goes…..Since I can remember, I had always wanted a child- when I was a little girl growing up, I wouldn’t be seen without my dollies and buggy. I have always wanted to be a mummy. On the 29th September, me and my boyfriend got together. I knew we were right for each other right from the very beginning. After about a month, we started having sex. We had conversations about what would happen if I fell pregnant, the answer was always the same- Never Abort, It Is Our Child.
At one point, we were even looking at baby stuff cause I thought I was pregnant, I wasn’t though so we stopped looking. I was disappointed to be honest.
The 15th March was quite a normal day. I went round his place and that night, we went to the cinema to see Juno. I was staying at his house that night, when we got back, we had sex. No protection.
We went away on the 4th April, for about 2 weeks, I bled on the 4th and thought that was my period- I was only bleeding for about 3 hours. I didn’t think anything of it. By the time we got back, I still had not come on my period. Me and him were having some trouble and I asked him what would happen if I was pregnant. He told me to stop being so stupid I was pregnant. So I didn’t mention it again. We sorted out our troubles within a couple of days and were back to normal. Still no period. I assumed my body was just be silly- didn’t think anything of it. Just thought I was worrying to much as my GCSE’s were coming up, I was finishing school, I had to find somewhere to live, College was starting in September.
By the 20th May (5 days before my 16th), I still had no period. I had missed April’s and May’s. So we decided to buy a pregnancy test the next day. We said we would go after school as we both had exams during the day. On the 21st, when school had finished, we both went to the pharmacy round the corner and brought a Clear Blue pregnancy test. We went home, I went in the bathroom and pee’d on the stick. Went back into his bedroom and waited a minute. Pregnant– was what it said. Deep down I knew.
I was so excited. My time was here, I thought. He was excited too. We wanted to shout it from the roof tops. I was so happy. We started planning things straight away- how we would cope as we didn’t have jobs, what baby stuff we would buy, what names we liked, what I was going to do about college, how to break the news to our families, how we would provide the best possible life for our child; our little baby that was growing in my belly. Things didn’t go to plan. My great aunt died early June- my mum was really close to her. I couldn’t tell her now I thought, it will kill her. We told his mum first, she was disappointed but told us she would stand by us whatever we chose and even heard us out about our plan and everything. The rest of his family didn’t take it so well but i knew they would come round.
I think it was the 18th or 19th June that I told my mum. I was on my own as he was at his house. She went mental saying that I couldn’t keep my baby, that it wasn’t even a baby, it was a thing, a bunch of cells, a mistake. No matter how much I begged her and how many tears ran down my ace she wouldn’t change her mind. She was so nasty, so horrible. She was on the phone to the doctor’s straight away finding out where I had to go, what I had to do.
She didn’t come with me to the doctor’s, to the consultation things, not even to the abortion.
On the 1st July, my baby, my child died. No, was murdered. I was 15 weeks and 3 days. I had to go to Bournemouth (an hour and half journey from my house) to have a surgical abortion. I was put in a small white room, all by myself. No one was allowed in with me. I was alone for 4 hours. They took me to a tiny white room where they put me to sleep and wheeled me into the operating theater. It was then my own child was murdered, on the Tuesday 1st July between 1.30pm and 1.45pm. I can’t remember much from that day. I think I’ve blocked it out. My mum didn’t come with me. My boyfriend and his mum did. When they picked me up, he had brought me a teddy bear, which I still have. I have called her Lexie-Mai. I called her this because that’s what we were going to call our baby if it was a girl.
My own mother had her grandchild murdered.
I wasn’t allowed to tell anyone- she told all her friends though. She told all my family i had the flu. I even got a few Get Well Soon cards. They still don’t know the truth.
Me and my mum have never talked about what happened. She has never mentioned it. About Bournemouth or the baby- because that’s what it was a baby- my baby- his baby. Its like she doesn’t even care. She has got on with her perfect life, not even worrying about me or how I am in pieces and have been everyday for the last 10 months. I knew she wouldn’t be happy but I thought she would have supported me.
I cry myself to sleep a lot of the time. I am emotionally ruined. I have to put on a fake smile everyday when really all I want to do is break down and cry but cant as I’m not allowed to tell anyone.
I would of made a good mummy, i know I would of. but I wasn’t given the chance to prove myself. Mum doesn’t care about how I feel, all she cares about is that her daughter is not a teenage mum as that would ruin her reputation.
I didn’t plan any of this- but it happened. I am 16 years old, have gone through the pain, heartbreak, and heartache that no one should have to go through, especially not from their own mother.
I wanted that child so much. I want my baby back. I even had a little bump that I held everyday. I would day anything to turn back time and stand up to my mum, and prove to her how I would of made a good mummy. And one day, I will prove it to her. My baby will stay with me forever, and no-one can ever replace his/her place in my life, in my heart.
Rest In Peace Baby- Mummy and Daddy love you so much
I am still with my boyfriend and our relationship is still going strong, but there are some cracks. He won’t express how he feels about the whole situation. When he sees me cry, he tells me it wasn’t my fault and I couldn’t do anything about it. And that he wanted our baby as much as I did and still do.
I don’t live with my mum anymore, and it has helped me a lot as I hardly see her anymore. I hate her- and don’t think I can ever stop myself from hating her! I hate myself. I can’t forgive myself for not standing up to her.
