I was 22 when I found out I was pregnant. I was an alcoholic and drug abuser, I was getting evicted from my residents, and wasn't even sure who the father of my child was. Both guys where also drug addicts and alcoholic's. My future for my child and I looked very dim. I just knew I could not give my child up in abortion or adoption I just knew that this was the situation I was in and I needed to do all I could to provide for this innocent life that grew inside of me. I moved in with my mom and 9 months later out came Antonio Lee a healthy 7Ib 8oz bundle of joy. I did figure out who the father was and while I was still pregnant he went to a rehab and got help.

Ok. So I guess this is my first time ever publicly admitting to anyone other than just a handful of close, personal friends that in February of 2008, at the age of 29 years old, without hesitation I chose to have an abortion.

I say without hesitation, but I have to explain that that had been my immediate decision from the moment I discovered that I was indeed pregnant- pregnant by a man whom I had only met a month prior. This man had come into my life in the most unexpected and surreal fashion, and as crazy as I felt, and to this day still do feel for this guy, I knew in my heart that the "timing" of this pregnancy would never work out for anyone's best interests…except maybe my own- a lesson learned the hard way that I shall now live with for the rest of my life. I had the abortion performed at only 4 weeks, a major reassurance to my conscience that it would be least devastating knowing that I would merely be removing what had been described to me as just a "blood clot" at this stage of pregnancy.

About seven years ago i came across your site on the internet. I was 19 at the time and i had just found out i was pregnant. My boyfriend and father of my baby ended up leaving while i was six months pregnant and still doesn't want contact with our son. I was young fun loving loved to go out and party a little wild and just starting college. I was working part time as a personal assistant and looking to go overseas and travel. The future looked bright for me to everyone we knew until i fell pregnant.  In the beginning i'd considered everything - having the baby, abortion and adoption. I kept an open mind and my doctor said to me that if i made a decision to make an informed decision that was right for me.

I'm not one to get excited by forwarded e-mail.  But this one came from a dear friend, so I read it.  And right off the bat, I was hooked.  I don't know who originally wrote this, but her words are timeless and true.  And so I share them with you, the Stand Up Moms.

*Invisible Mother*.....

It all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response, the way one of the kids will walk into the room while I'm on the phone and ask to be taken to the store. Inside I'm thinking, 'Can't you see I'm on the phone?'

Still there was something wrong. I could do nothing but think about life with the baby. I knew I could do it. I knew it and I  knew he would be there. I felt so hopeless. I told my mom a few days later and then my dad. And I was pushed to have an abortion, immediatly, because they just "want the best for me".

A week later we went for an ultrasound to start the process of a non-surgical abortion. My mom waiting in the lobby while my boyfriend came with me through everything. The ultrasound said I was six and a half weeks pregnant about three weeks farther along than I had thought.