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Hi love,
cramping can be normal in a pregnancy as it is the muscles in your uterus ‘moving’ to accomodate the baby. Or so my doctor told me when I was pregnant. Also a home pregnancy test generally doesn’t pick it up until week 5 or six I believe. So the best way to tell before then is book an ultra sound and speak to your general practitioner.
Hey Splash,
Firstly, I’d think twice before taking Cam2know’s advise as staying with him isn’t good for you or the baby (i believe it’s called inuterostress? which is basically when the baby is in the womb and the mother goes through a distressing situation and the child actually gains a memory of that stress that can later be triggered in life). This guy may love you but there is a difference between healthy and unhealthy love and his isn’t healthy it’s obsessive and distressing for you as I see from your post.
I have been in a similar situation and staying isn’t the answer. Go and see a lawyer/solicitor and find out what your rights are when it comes to sole custody etc if you wish to follow though with the pregnancy. If he is going to try and strip you of this child then it would help to be prepared!
If you wish to have another abortion make sure that you see someone afterwards to help you though this tough time and perhaps can give you some tools to help you make sense of it all.
I get that it is hard to see through all the fog at the moment but if you find someone objective to talk to it should help. (google Rachel’s Vineyard, they are predominatly post-abortion service but they should be able to refer you on. if your not religious don’t stress they don’t push god onto you) But no matter what, whether you keep this child or not please don’t stay with him as it won’t get any better and there is a high he will just inflict his abuse and anger upon the child.
Studies have shown that just because you where abused or neglected as a child doesn’t mean you will abuse or neglect your children. There is a book called “Escaping Daddy” by Maria Landon I beleive. Have a read, it is very sad in parts but she is a remarkable woman and perhaps she may give you some thing to think about when it comes to leaving a relationship like your current one as it is hard I have been there but it will take time and once you break away for good you will remember that you deserve so much better. I hope I haven’t come accross as too “pro life” as I am “pro whatever is best for you”
Be strong,
Love and Hugs
Tennassity
