I am new to this site and I just wanted to share my story about my pregnancy, delivery, and motherhood.

Me and my boyfriend have been together since freshman/sophomore year (I’m now 18). We loved each other so much that we chose to not use protection. In June, I found out I was pregnant, and I was heartbroken because my relationship with the father was really going downhill, but I knew I was going to keep the baby. We talked about what we were going to do because I lived so far away from him and my life at home wasn’t fit to raise a child in. So we decided that it would be best if I moved in with him and his parents. Keep in mind we are both the same age. Neither of us had a job and both of us were scared. The first part of my pregnancy went well. I didn’t get sick a lot. I was just tired. I ended up changing to a school where I went only four hours a day. That way, I could go to doctor’s appointments when I needed.

At around 25 weeks, I went to the doctor and they measured my belly and I was measuring 29 weeks (that’s a HUGE difference). So my gut feeling told me that things weren’t probably going to go right. I began keeping an eye on my blood pressure and each time I went to the doctor’s, it was higher than the time before, and my body began to swell( I gained 9 pounds in one week!). I was worried. Around 32 weeks, I got a cold that just wouldn’t go away. So I called the doctor’s office and they told me to come in, so I did. They did the usual weighing and blood pressure. Well, when they did my blood pressure, it was 160 over 101 (this is very high). So they sent me to the bathroom to pee in a cup to test my urine for protein (this is done the a little stick, you just put it in the pee and it will turn a color) and I did have a good amount of protein in my urine. So they sent me over to the hospital for more tests and monitoring. I was so afraid for my son. I kept thinking how could this be happening. Hours later, the doctor came in and said that they wanted to give me a steroid shot to help the baby’s lungs mature faster if he needed to be born now. They also said that I had preeclampsia and that I was at a high risk of having a stroke or something like that. They told me that I needed to stay at the hospital.

My world was being flipped upside down in a matter of a few hours. I was terrified! While I was in the hospital, my boyfriend stayed with me, but he complained the whole time that he was bored, or that he was tired, and that I slept too much. So I didn’t have much support from him. I felt alone, scared, overwhelmed. I worried about my son, about how small he would be and if he would survive. I was admitted to the hospital on Dec. 30. And on Jan 2, the doctor came into my hospital room and told me that she didn’t like what she saw on my blood work and that she wanted to start inducing me. At that time, I was alone. My boyfriend had left hours earlier to go help his grandpa. I was so afraid. They had me change into an ugly dress thing and they transferred me over to labor and delivery. One nurse tried to get an IV in me, but I was so swollen they couldn’t nor could they feel my veins very well. So they had someone numb my arm so they could dig for one. Thankfully, he got it on the first try. They started me on this medicine, which made me feel like my skin was on fire. It was to help my blood pressure. Then my boyfriend arrived and told me sorry it took so long, I was busy. Then he started complaining about how hungry he was. Needless to say, I was pissed!

Then they had someone from the NICU come in and talk with me about how small my baby was going to be and that he probably will have a hard time eating and all this other stuff. I couldn’t help, but to feel like this was all my fault.