Wow! Seems like I’ve been gone forever.

Life has been so hectic…My boyfriend and I are doing very well. Well, we were until he found out that I was considering going to the army. He’s very upset and doesn’t want me to go. I’m confused. I love him, but I also need to think of my future… The whole situation just sucks. He asked me to marry him and stay, but to be completely honest, I’m terrified of that. Yes, I love him and would love to spend the rest of my life with him. But I’m afraid that I’ll find a way to mess things up, especially since I’m not quite ready for marriage yet… He even tried to get me pregnant so that I couldn’t go to the army… That really almost broke us up. He knew how hard it was for me to get over the miscarriage of my and my ex-boyfriend’s baby. But he sincerely apologized and worked to gain my trust back.

I just don’t know what to do…