To all the young girls of SUG who are TTC…….I URGE YOU TO WAIT!!

Some of you may know my story, some may not, but when I first joined SUG, I was a 19-year-old girl who was desperately wanting a baby. Like some of you, I cried for one, prayed for one, spent so much time looking at baby clothes, pregnancy sites, and parenting sites. Hoping and wishing every month my period would be a no-show and stay that way until I gave birth to a beautiful baby. I, like you, felt a twinge at the sound of a baby crying or laughing and felt the longing at the sight of a newborn or a pregnant woman passing me by. I was in your shoes so deep it consumed me. For a whole year, I spent my energy, my wishes, and my prayers asking to finally get pregnant. I had those many nights of tearful solitude. I got jealous, I got angry, I got woeful, I got frustrated, I felt defeated, diminished, and denied of my right to be a mother. I asked God ‘Why?!’ too many times to mention. I imagined and dreamed about the baby I hoped would come soon. I envisioned my labour, knew what names, what kind of birth, what the room decor for my baby would be. Like you might have now; I had it all planned. I was ready. I had the fiancé, a job, my own place, a great plan… But I’m so glad I didn’t get pregnant.

I had a job. But one with no future. I had my own home but it was barely enough for me and my BF. I had a plan but it relied on most things going smoothly and according to that plan. I had a strong relationship with my Fiancé, but going through certain dark times would have only damaged our young family. No – two broken people cannot make good parents unless they wait for life to provide a time for great healing and strengthening. You may ‘feel’ you’re ready but we are all ready for the fantasy. The reality is ALWAYS unknown. You are never sure until you’re in it. And by then, its irreversible.

You’re only young once. Youth is irreplaceable and time doesn’t rewind. A baby will not fill that empty hole you feel inside. A baby is a life, not a solution.

Please just wait….You’ll be thankful you did.

xxx