11 weeks and 2 days into my pregnancy

I don’t even really know what to write here, as you can see from the title I’m 11 weeks and 2 days into my pregnancy. The day I found out I never thought I’m not going to have a child straight away it was “I’m going to have a baby how the hell am i meant to do this?”

God has a plan for us all.

Two years ago my virginity was cruelly taken away from me, however i was yet to loose my faith. It started disappearing slowly i began blaming God for what happened and finally i lost my faith all together. However the day i found out i was pregnant I turned back to the Lord realizing that he alone could save me, he alone had written this all in his plan, i realized I’m not in control God is and he was given me this amazing blessing a chance to bring life into this world to raise my beautiful child give her/him a chance to live, a chance to do good and all i felt was love and that’s what i feel now since returning to my faith.

My Ex tried to get me to have an abortion i even went to the first appointment but I already knew this was my child and I told the lady I didn’t want to do it, she sent me to get an ultra sound and watching the lady try to hide the screen and the measurements from me was soo hard i just wanted to scream this is my child let me see them. She spoke as though abortion was soo natural the easiest thing in the world that it would be better for me because I was only 19 I left telling myself I would never enter that place again even with the pressure from my Ex and also to some extent my Mum.

I never did.

I have a life filled with hope, a baby growing inside of me. Friends who are happy for me, a church where they love me.

and the biggest thing of all

I have God’s love and forgiveness.

A baby is always a blessing.

Don’t let anyone persuade you because it’s the easy option just see Love. your love for your baby and the love that everyone has for you. Ignore the negatives always focus on the positives.

Risked destroying my babies life

Where has the time gone? Last time I wrote in my blog, I was 11 weeks into my pregnancy and everyone was trying to talk me into an abortion. Yet here I am with my beautiful 14-month-old baby girl lying in bed next to me. She is perfection snuggling up to ‘Duckie’, her new Easter cuddly.

I never thought life could be so fantastic. When people see me, they say I look the happiest they’ve ever seen me and they’d be right. This life I carried for 9 months makes me the happiest I’ve ever been, the happiness I feel can’t be described it is beyond what I could have ever believed.

Times are sometimes tough. Money will always be an issue, but I would rather go without than allow my daughter to. She wants for nothing and gets everything. All she has to do is look at me and I’m hers totally and completely. She is my ray of sunshine, always smiling and happy, always loves life. The smile never fades off her face. She babbles and chats away, creating new words and joining small sentences, ‘mooing’ and ‘quacking’ every few words. She loves her animals and believes her cuddles are real.

I can’t believe I ever went to that clinic, ever risked destroying my baby’s life.

she is my life, my soul, my world

Roo, you complete me!