Hi everyone, I felt like it was time to share my story because just reading that someone else went through what you are going through really helped me to feel more comfortable. I’m currently 19 turning 20 in November, my precious baby boy is turning 3 months old on the 1st of April, and I feel soooo blessed to have him in my life. I can’t imagine life without him.
Since I was 15, we have moved around a lot. I lived in South Africa in a small town known as Secunda in South Africa until I was 15 when we moved to Saudi Arabia. I turned into a real rebel and started drinking (which is illegal in Saudi Arabia), smoking more than usual, and doing drugs (which is also illegal). I was out every night on the weekends even when my parents banned me from going out. I would climb out of my window to go hang out with friends. I was a real rebel and didn’t care what anyone said or thought. After two years in Saudi, we moved to South Korea and we lived in Seoul. I went to an American International Christian school. I changed my whole lifestyle and got my path right with Jesus. The year in Korea did me good. I got my life back on track; didn’t drink, smoke, or do drugs. I really thought I was ready to face anything life could throw my way, but I was wrong.
After a year in Korea, we moved back to Saudi and everything went back to the way it was the first two years in Saudi. I went back to doing drugs, drinking, and smoking. I was out every night till 5 in the morning when I would sneak back into my room. My first weekend back, my friends threw me a welcome-back party and I went crazy, I drank more than I ever did and soon I was in the arms of a guy I didn’t even know. The guy was really sweet and helped me get back home. We started hanging out more and getting to know each other and soon we were together. On the night he asked me out (1st of April), we unknowingly conceived our son. We thought nothing of it and we slept together every time we saw each other. I was still doing drugs and still drinking and smoking like crazy. Life was a party every night. Soon my fiancé went back to South Africa for vacation. Every day, he would tell me that I might be pregnant and I kept telling him it can’t be. I can’t be pregnant. I have one more year of school left. So before I went to South Africa to join him, I was still out every night doing crazy stuff. I kept telling him I couldn’t be pregnant. I had my period, and I don’t know if I’m late because I have always had irregular periods (at that time I didn’t know it was spotting). I didn’t have morning sickness. I was tired, but it was because I was working myself crazy at school with exams and cheerleading and cross country. And my breast was swollen, but that always happens before I get my period. So I didn’t think anything about being pregnant.
The day I landed in South Africa, he took me to the doctor to do a blood test, just because I refused to take a pregnancy test because I believed I wasn’t pregnant. I told the doctor I had my period (spotting) and he told me I might have had a miscarriage. We did the blood test and the doctor told me to call back after a week. So in that week, we went to clubs and drunk and smoked and did drugs like I always do. I called the doctor on the 28th of June and the receptions told me that I’m between 7 and 8 weeks pregnant and she made me an appointment for the next week. (That next week I found out I was actually 12 weeks pregnant and didn’t even know that I missed the first three months). At that exact moment, I rubbed my tummy and thanked the Lord that I was pregnant. I was excited and so happy that I was pregnant. There was no shock, no sadness, nothing at all. We went to his house in South Africa and told his parents and to my surprise, they were all sooooo excited and supported us a hundred percent. That same night ,we decided to tell my parents so it could be out of the way. My parents were still in Saudi so we had to Skype them. I was sitting in the chair, shaking, not knowing what their reaction would be. I told my parents I have big news to share with them and immediately my mom said, “You’re pregnant.” Shocked, I said yes. I’m pregnant and I’m keeping the baby and taking full responsibility for the baby. My dad was all quiet and only said “as long as you take responsibility and take care of the baby and love the baby and never neglect the baby, I will support you.” My mom, on the other hand, freaked out and didn’t want to talk to me. But the next morning, I got an email from her saying sorry for her reaction and she supports us and will help me with anything I will need, but she is upset and sad because we had so much hopes and dreams together, but we will love this child because it is a blessing.
So he had to go back to Saudi that Wednesday for work. And a few weeks after that, I went back to pack up my things and to hang out with my parents before I finally had to return back to South Africa because in Saudi, they would lock me, my dad, and my fiancé in a prison because the baby was made out of wedlock and it is illegal for men and women to be together when they are not married. So after a few weeks, I came back to South Africa, moved into an apartment, and stayed on my own during my pregnancy. My parents came to visit on the 22nd of December and my dad stayed until the 12th of January. My mom and brother left on the 22nd of February. My boyfriend landed in South Africa on the 31st of January and on the 1st of January, my baby was born (but that is a story for a different day, my next blog). My fiancé had to go back on the 25th of January and after my mom and brother left, I have been alone with baby ever since.
So this is my story of my pregnancy (everything in short), so if anyone has any questions about anything you can just ask, I love to help out where I can and I’m not ashamed of any dirty details. I’m a open person and if it would help someone, I won’t mind. So be free to ask me anything!!
Lots of Love