I heard about that 15-year-old girl who was pregnant and died of a heart attack today. She lost her baby and her life. Her fiancée lost as he put it ‘His world’. She was one of us StandUpGirls, she kept her baby. It was a little girl they were going to call Tia.

So now, here’s me. Upset that I’ve just lost my baby, but after hearing that story, I actually feel disappointed in myself, disappointed that I’m grieving for a baby I didn’t even know about. That girl, like many of us, had her whole life to lead. She was excited, making plans, and then her life and baby were snatched from her. It’s her family that should be grieving, not mine.
The loss of any life is terrible, but this one has particularly gotten to me. I don’t know if it’s because she shares the same name and age as my baby sister.
We had planned a baby but not yet- We had baby names
Jaia Madison Rochellea Jacobs
Cole Joshua Sterling Jacobs

And now I want another baby- But am I being selfish towards Gem Gem for having another baby close to her age?

I have so many questions, but no answers to help.