In the morning, I woke up from a bad dream… In my dreams, I took 2 pregnancy tests (a digital and a strip one). They say “NEGATIVE” then because of the result, I will not be able to carry a child anymore., (T_T)

I know it’s weird, but it affects me so much. Coz last night, I kept on watching, on YouTube, girls who were taking pregnancy tests and got a “POSITIVE” and there was so much happiness with the positive result.

Then in the afternoon, I went to my friend’s house, visiting her and her baby! Then my boyfriend fetched me then I was telling him about my bad dream… And we decided to buy a PREGNANCY TEST! (which is not planned coz our plan was to take the test tomorrow FRIDAY) because I’m being paranoid. So we went to his place then I took the test in their bathroom… Then I had “NEGATIVE” (T_T). When I went out, I gave the test result to him and I never talked again. I kept myself silent, wondering what’s wrong. Something like that, are we not meant for each other? So he asked me.. Am I OK? Then I said YES! I’m good… He told that he knew me that I am not good, so I never talked again, then he brought me out with some friends… Then he bought 1 MUCHO OF RED HORSE (mucho means big bottle and red horse is beer). He told me that we will drink, one-on-one, so I can forget all of my wanderings with the result. So he kept on talking to me, telling me not to RUSH myself coz we are not in rush, and to calm myself, to not stress myself too much for my wants… Do not hope too much… We are just waiting… I should be relaxed and he was trying to make me smile, where he wins my SMILE.. 😉 He told me that he was also upset, but he did not want to be sad. For me, he is making himself strong,  then he kissed me then hugged me.. (all the time)

OMG! And I find myself now so much HAPPY… Now I really really proud to say to the whole world that “I HAD THE BEST AMONG THE BEST BOYFRIEND EVER.” I am so lucky to have him. 😉 He understands me, he loves me so much… I find myself like his PRINCESS where he take good care of me. 😉 I find myself like HIS GOLD that he don’t want to be stained…

I LOVE HIM SO MUCH! I made a promise to hm that I will be OK! From now on, I will hot hope so much., but now I still have my hopes, but not much.. I have hopes until I never get my period., 😉