Okay so this blog is going to tell you my story (obviously since it’s in the title).
I found out I was a month pregnant at the age of 18, the week before I turned 19. I was so scared yet excited all in the same breathe. I told my boyfriend and he was excited and scared as well. He’s been supportive so has his family. So I’m not alone throughout this pregnancy. But I have had a lot of negativity in my pregnancy. When you’re young, you sort of realize who your true friends are when something this big happens. My best friend of 5 years when I told her I was pregnant told me I was ruining my life and should abort it. I told her I couldn’t and wouldn’t ever do something like that because I knew there was a chance I could conceive even using the proper birth control and I still chose to have sex. It’s not this unborn child’s fault that it happened, it’s nobody’s fault. Because this child is a blessing and something that I wouldn’t give up for the world.
Anyways, when I told her I wouldn’t abort, it she bailed on my life. And wrote cruel evil things about me on Facebook. I was hurt and upset by it but in the end, I realized there’s no reason to be. She is just being immature and trying to get me upset. I’m now 6 months pregnant. And my life is getting more and more complicated. My doctor has me on a leave of absence from work because I have blood pressure problems. It can rise and then drop severely, which is really bad I’m guessing. So my boyfriend is the sole income coming in. And we’re trying to save for a vehicle and we’re trying to get a place. I live with my parents but my mom is trying to control my pregnancy and won’t listen to me. She also says things like me and my boyfriend won’t last and he will abandon me and all sorts of cruel things that make me upset. Because my boyfriend won’t ever do that. He’s the best thing in my life. He’s been my best friend for 6 years and my boyfriend for two… So I know he won’t leave my life or our child. And my mom keeps planning and trying to keep me here in her house so she can control my child and my life. She’s already telling me where I’m going to force it to go to school and such. It’s just so infuriating.
But yeah, this is my story so far! I hope you enjoyed reading it so far, haha. I’ll update you as much as I can 🙂
I love feedback so if you have any, you can give it to me 🙂
My period is 2 months late,
and It’s stress, I know It Is.
Being late and all though, the thought
of having a baby amazes me and warms my heart.<3
I love babies and toddlers, and kids of all ages.<3
I know being a teen mother would be extremely difficult,
and I would be putting my life on hold, in all aspects.
But If It happens, I am by no means questioning It.
I wouldn’t have to think about It, I will love my baby
unconditionally; with their father in my life or not.
I wasn’t pregnant, what a relief off my shoulder!!! But still, had I been pregnant, my life would have been totally different!
I would never have met my new boyfriend or been able to experience life outside living with Mom and Dad. But, I do want to be a mother.
My mom I found out has breast cancer this week. I can’t believe it! My mom, the only one I’ll ever have is in such danger!!! Oh dear.
OK… Well the day I wrote my blog about possibly being pregnant…I was in a terrible car accident and I am pretty beat up from it and if I WAS pregnant then I’m not so sure I am now…
If you wanna know about the car accident, then just sign my guest book and I’ll reply…
I am 15 years old and I just had an abortion not too long ago and I regret it. Made the same mistakes and now I’m pregnant again. Now I got to live with it. I know it’s going to be hard but I gotta learn from my mistakes.
So all you teens out there reading this, please don’t go and have sex. Just wait till you get married. I don’t care if you think this boy is the love of your life. That is something very special to you and you don’t want to lose it just to anybody. No matter what he tells you, don’t listen. If he really loves you, he will wait. So please, think twice cause I’ve been through it and learned the hard way.
We all go through trials, and nobody’s pain can be compared to anybody else’s. And yet, sometimes, it just all seems too much.
When anxiety overwhelms you, and all you can feel is a creeping sense of panic, sometimes it’s so hard to stay strong.
But, hah! aren’t I the strong one? The one that everyone looks at and says, she is strong. It’s like a label I have to wear. The one that looks good every day, clean, well-dressed, the one that people want to “get with”. Sometimes, I’m not sure whether people actually miss that there is a person underneath there, whose smile is sometimes fake and who’s just a little girl waiting to hold somebody’s hand so they could lead her out of this darkness.
The one that has so much potential. Yes, I have a lot of potential, but I don’t know if you know how much effort it takes to get that potential through, when all I can feel is panic; and I just want it to stop.
I’m not stopping living for one bit, I’m not stopping hope. I’m still dancing to the sound of life, and I’m happy to be here, I’m enjoying it all. But it feels like I’m dancing on quicksand.
Like a life thread slipping away out of my hands, like, after holding on so long, slipping back into darkness.
I have a past, you know. Everybody has pasts, and I’m no different. It’s just getting to me.
I don’t want to let mine eat me up though, and I’m trying not to. I’m trying…There are people holding out their hands and I am grabbing on for dear life, while continuing to dance on this quicksand. Let me just hope I hold on. Let me hope I carry on with this dance I have to do.
