Why does everyone have a goal to make me cry now? What did I do to deserve this hell? Today was the worst of it. The baby daddy had to bring up funerals and crap like that. It just brought back the worst memories of the year. Then he said, “What about you, have you lost anyone close to you this year?” Like he didn’t already know! My stepson through adoption/cousin passed away due to a tragic accident. All week, I haven’t cried until he had to bring up all that. Everybody was like, ‘Well, at least you’re talking now.’ Honestly, I would rather him ignore me than bring him up ever again. I know trying to just forget about the whole thing is not the right approach, but I can’t help but think it was all my fault. How does a TV fall on a two-year-old? How is a mother, step or biological, ever supposed to live through this when I’m scared to think about my little girl, cause I might lose her too!?