Hello my name is Rapheal. Of course you probably wonder “why is a boy writing to me?” Well, I’m 18 years old, and so is my girlfriend. My girlfriend and I are pregnant. I don’t want her to have an abortion but she says she going to have one anyway. I gave her half the money because I didn’t want her to think that I didn’t care about her.

One thing that really gets me mad is how when we were having sex we tried it without a condom once and we both liked that better so at one point she told me if you wear a condom we’re not going to have sex. Of course I didn’t care. We both knew the risk we were taking.

When she finds out she’s pregnant, the first thing that comes into her mind is abortion because she doesn’t want to mess her life up. I think being stuck at home is no reason to murder you child. If you did the deed at least be responsible and have your child.

We both have jobs, regular jobs, but it’s enough to get an apartment and pay for some baby stuff, plus i know my mom will help even though i haven’t told her yet.

For a male I’m very disappointed in my girlfriend. I don’t know what I feel right now. I cried this morning after she told me she was going to the clinic today. I cried for my unborn child. I think the male in my situation has no say over anything. I am young but I know I would be a good father to my child. I would give the rest of my life to provide for him.

To be honest I don’t think I could have sex knowing that my dead baby came out of the same place. Thinking of that every time before sex is not something I want to do. I JUST WANT YOU LADIES TO KNOW THAT I DO NOT SUPPORT ABORTION BUT THERE’S NOTHING I CAN DO, BECAUSE THE BABY’S NOT IN MY BODY. Its not fair!

Dear Becky,

There has been a great turn around in the last 2 days.
First, my girlfriend didn’t get the abortion because the baby was 3 and a half months and they wouldn’t do it. Also, I told my mother, so things should be better.


Dear Rapheal,

wow. I don’t know what to say. Your story is so gut-wrenching. I hope and pray that your girlfriend doesn’t go through with the abortion. Make sure you let her know how you feel…that you want her to have the baby and you want to support her through everything. This can make a HUGE difference. Be strong. Be there for her. She needs you to be strong for her. I know you feel helpless, but there is a lot you CAN do, by reminding that you are inthis together and you want to help her in any way you can.

Until she actually goes to the clinic and has the abortion, there is still a chance that your girlfriend may change her mind. She is probably panicing right now. You need to be the rock that she can lean against. If you speak the truth with love and support, she may be willing to listen.

I will keep you both in my prayers. Please let me know what happens.


love standupgirl becky

Dear Raphael,

I am so happy to hear that your girlfriend is going to have her baby. You must be really relieved. She is really going to need a lot of love and support from you during this time. Be there for her. You are a daddy now. You have the chance to make things right.

What precious gift that baby is to you both. Yes, he or she will change your lives in a big way, but change can be good. You will discover things about yourself that you never knew before. You will find you have an inner strength that you never knew you had.

My boyfriend supported me in my pregnancy right from the very beginning. That meant SO much. Seriously, I don’t know what I would have done without him. We ended up getting married and he took it upon himself to provide for the family. I am eternally grateful to him for all of the sacrifices he has made for us.

Girls are standing up and deciding to do what is right and have their baby. Guys need to stand up and take responsiblity for their actions, too. You seem to be doing that. Good for you! I really want to encourage you in that!


love standupgirl becky