I don’t even know where to begin..I am 20 years old and will be 21 in feb.I am already a mommy of a beautiful little girl who will be 2 in feb..I just recently found out I am 5weeks pregnant as of last thursday.I’ve completely been against abortions since i could remember..but faced with the decision now it’s complicated..I’ve only been with the father for about only 5 mths..who

is to already a father and is completely against abortions..Which is why he doesnt know about his own child yet=/..I feel guilty bc i dont know what to do I went to the doctors to see how far i was and they did an ultra-sound which made it even harder..Their was only a little black dot and i just starred when he told me it was like i knew after 3 positive pregnany tests but it made it so real when i actually seen..I didnt even talk to my doctor about my unsurniss because i was to ashamed for even feeling the way i do.he was so excited for me and said heres a picture of your dot..i wanted to be excited and i wanted to run home like i did with my first pregnancy and show my family “My Dot”..but nobody knows except for my mom who is torn for me..I am terrified though..My daughters father left when she was 12weeks old and hasnt done anything but hurt us the past 2 years i’ve done everything but make him be in her life..I’ve become very independent and wouldnt change my past for ANYTHING because my daughter is my world without her i wuldnt be the same..shes the reason i wake up every morning im in love with being a mother..and then after almost 2 years of being single and in and out of guys who just werent right for my daugher and i..i met the guy i am with now..who seems so perfect for me..but it all just happened so fast..hes WONDERFUL TO ME AND MY DAUGHTER and my family loves him but i just think a 2nd child right now would just make things complicated..which sounds so selfish i know but i still live at home with my mom work at a resturaunt as a hostess and i make enough to get by..and just got everything together to go to college to be a RN..I am just completely torn my mom is worried because she says i cant just block it out..i know i cant and thats what i’ve done as if i dont hve to face it..Yesterday I told my mom to make the appt. she said are you sure and i just felt like i had made up my mind to have an abortion..she called me today and said okay i am going to call and i said no..she came home and said that i needed to stop denying i was pregnant..I knew i needed other opinions and i didnt want it to be from any1 that i knew so i got on here..I know no1 can make the decision for me or make my mind up..i just thought that maybe hearing other storys or opinions would help..I’m lost and hate feeling this way..I just want to do the right thing and i dont know what the right thing is right now..I keep wondering how i’ll feel if i go through with it and after reading some of the storys..I dont want to regret anything but i dont want to just get by i want to better myself before bringing another child into this world but at the same time i dont want to take a life away=/