What should i do

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      my gf just had it done. it meaning abortion. in the country we grew up it is still a very delicate subject you shoulden’t even mention. the problem is, shie is studying abroad and i cannot be there to help her get through this. but the major problem is i have absolutely no idea what should i say. i’m in a long time relationship with her, i tell her that i love her and i want to support her, hovever, these are just meere words. she tells me i have no idea what she’s going through, and i know she’s right. and when i’m trying to be permissive and accepting, she tells me, that i don’t care and i should react. however, she won’t tell me how. she’s going to some sort of rejection phase right now, trying to pretend, that it’s ok. I think, that by accepting it i’m acting as a coward, it’s like saying : "ok, nothing happened, non of my business". it’s not the first time we’r going through i supoose, and i find her anxious sometimes, on what i consider to unsetteled abortion issues backgrund. i find her disturbed by the matter and therefore i’d be glad to help her, but i don’t have the slightest idea how. any ideas?
      many thanks for your support. for me and her. noone.


        hi there

        i myself have gone through having an abortion amd it is the most hardest thing in the world a person can go through.

        i was and still iam trying to cope with the after abortion thing, My boyfriend does not know how to handle my moodswings. Life is different after us girls go through it and it changes us, we are not sure that our current partners still loves us or what we are suppossed to expect off. We also feel that everyone knows what we have done and that they ar judging us for it, When i get into my moodswings its because my partner is not spending enough time with me that i expect him too, maybe thats how she feels

        A copule of weeks after i had my abortion i was digoinsed with depression and i reaseeached ion the net more about it and i discovered that i had PASS (post abortive stress syndrome) thats waht she might have. ill put a link on this page that you can go to and there is a quiz on there to see if she does have it.


        i hope that this website will help it did for me.

        please let me know what happens



          Its hard. and being so far away from her deffinatly does not help. I too went into a depression after my ‘it’. My man was right along side me and I’m not sure how he put up with me. He tells me he hated to see what I was going through. I don’t know what to tell you on how to act towards her.

          Babe, I love you no matter how far away you are. I’m more sorry than you know that you had to go through this. I wish I could do more for you, and/or be there physically for you. Nothing but time will make this feeling pass. If time still hasen’t healed your emotional wound then you need to see a doctor, or things will just get worse.

          It took me about three months and two or three pills to get past that part of my life. And do have her do some research. If you know about what your going through it helps you know how to get past it.

          Good Luck..

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