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      Hi gals

      I am mother of 9 year old boy….I am no longer with his father.I have another man in my life……..I am 3 weeks pregnant with his child.He is so overjoyed with that but I know I might sound silly the thought of going for an HIV test makes me so scared that I feel I would rather abort but how do I live with again…….I am so scared of the test but at the same time wants to do the right thing for my baby…….My bf promises that we can go together for the test and if things are not good we will go for the best gynae who specialises ib HIV + pregnancy rather than abort……..gals I am so scared I know the obviuos answer will be to go for the test but geee I cannot shake the feeling that it might come positive and I am not sure if I want to deal with that……..To top it all I understand these things very well as I am a registered nurse but this anxiety is spoiling my our joy for the coming baby.

      My BF says he is scared too but abortion will not make the virus go waway if it is already there and eventually everyone needs to know about their status at some point anyway.

      Hey I know this sounds stupid hey but I am so scared.


        Hello Ladydee,

        Fearing the unknown can consume you and any possible enjoyment in the life you have to live now at this point with your supportive boyfriend, 9 yr. old son, and your precious baby inside you.

        Embrace the gift that has been given to you and love the ones who are in your life regardless of what the test results may be. Your boyfriend is wise in telling you that having an abortion will not make HIV disappear. You are very lucky to have a boyfriend who is willing to stand up for you, your son and this new child that you and he created. Please do not believe that killing your baby will save you any pain or suffering, or that you will be doing the right thing for your baby. Finding a specialist OBGYN who is experienced in these types of pregnancies is wonderful advice. Trust that they will do everything they can for you and your baby, should the test come back positive, and let modern medicine work.
        There are other tragedies besides HIV that can claim peoples lives at any given minute of the day. Are they not to enjoy their life or their unborn babies because of what “might” happen?

        There are no gaurantees in life, but if you are making better, healthier decisions for yourself, your children and your future life with your boyfriend, then I believe you are doing the best you can and as a result, you will see the rewards of your love for your baby.

        I hope all will be well for you, and if you need any other guidance or just want to talk, we are always here.


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