HOME › Hot Topics › Girl Zone › Parent Talk – Advice and Support for Moms › Replacing my family with my babys daddy..
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December 7, 2007 at 5:40 am #19833randomchyck220
My name is Olivia. I’m 17 years old and 16 weeks pregant.
I’m still with my amazing boyfriend whom I love to death. But even though he reassures me everyday that he’ll always be there I can’t help but think what if the worst happens? What if he leaves me?Ever since I told my family that i was pregnant, they’ve been distant, more than i expected them to be. Its like i’ve been pushed out of the family. I feel so depressed sometimes, like I can’t get the emotional or physical support or love from them anymore. My mom basically works all the time and when she’s home she never talks to me, she’s always finding a place to hide, like in front of the computer, or the TV, or out at a bar. My dad, he’s the one whos always around, but he’s given up on me completely, and it hurts. Everytime I try to ask him something he doesnt even let me finish my sentence, he just cuts me off and says "Whatever it is, its a no." And its so fustrating that he’s so stressed out, I completely understand that its been hard for him lately but i wish he would try to work out his feelings with me. I just feel like I’ve completely failed as a daughter.
So thats why I’m so attached to my boyfriend. I can hardly go a day without seeing him, most of the time less than that. I don’t want to be this attached, yeah i know its completely normal to be close to your babys father of course, but I feel like I’m overly attached because I always need him around and I always need his attention. He’s noticed this in the past, and has asked me before why I’m so clingy. But I can’t help it. If I can’t get the love I need from my family, where else do I find it?
December 7, 2007 at 7:28 pm #19845way2youngAWW THAT ALMOST MADE ME CRY. I FEEL SO SORRY FOR YOU AND I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND. I GUESS THAT BECAUSE YOUR PARENTS ARE DISTANT THAT YOU ARE CLINGING TO YOUR BOYFIREND. I HOPE THAT THINGS GET BETTER WITH YOUR PARENTS SOO. I REALLY DO. BTW ARE YOU AN ONLY CHILD.
December 8, 2007 at 10:07 am #19860alexanders_mamaI’m really sorry to hear about that.
How is it going on the friendship front?
Maybe try joining a young mothers group?December 9, 2007 at 7:00 pm #19872kez_mummy_2_skyei can sort of get ya in some ways.
I left home at 17 to be with my b/f who has been in the family since i was about 9. He wasn’t very liked but they never saw the soft side of him that melted my heart.
I didnt speak to dad coz he didnt approve and i was VERY clingy towards my now hubby. In the end this didnt work my way, he hated it and caused arguements and in the end we split up for 2wks, i have to say it was about the hardest time of my life. Now that ive got kids it has made me wake up and realise alot of things.Can you sit down and write your Dad a letter? I find thats the easiest way of getting things out if someone wont hear you out. Be deep with your words so he knows exactly how you are feeling.
Keep us updated 🙂December 11, 2007 at 6:20 am #19887randomchyck220i have a younger sister
December 11, 2007 at 11:32 am #19891MerlaI can completely understand where your coming from, My mum remarried a few years back, and my stepdad hated me, so i got stuck in a boarding school for my remaining year and a bit of highschool, with minimal contact with my mum and dad (who lives in a different state), the biggest side effect of this was how close i got to my boyfriend (still soon to be fiance :p), I got really clingy, because he was all i had, all i still have. We saw eachother everyday, but it was never enough, and now we are living together, we still miss eachother whenever we go off to work. Its ok to feel clingy on the one person that you trust. But you may want to sit down and talk to him and made sure that its not going to cause any problems, i was lucky because my boy is actually clingier than me (as difficult as that is to believe). The biggest thing that scares a lot of young women is that they rely on one person, and because dependent they actually end up driving them away.
If the clingyness is becoming a problem, try and dispurse it out a bit, become closer to some friends, and cling to your unborn child, because they are always there with you (least till they are born).
Goodluck! hope that helped a little…
December 14, 2007 at 10:08 pm #19924randomchyck220aww thanks you guys =] yeah i shared how i felt with my babys daddy and he understood because he knows how my parents are. they kinda neglect me in a way =[ i feel like the black sheep..
December 17, 2007 at 10:08 pm #19947Mommieofchriswow you sound just like i was.. and im telling you right now your best finding good friends!.. my family pushed me as far away as they could… without kicking me out.. so i ran straight to my boyfriend… he didnt want to give me the attention i felt like i needed, pushed him away.. we bailed on me.. and i had to go back home, now its akward.. painfull.. iritating… horriable.. all of those things.. i just wish i had kept good friends.. cause then i wouldnt have left home, and i wouldnt have tried to work things out with my sons father. i still try so hard to be a family with my family.. but i think thats long sence over. i wish you so much luck.. i know how you feel.
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