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  • #20355
    justkeepsmilin

      ryt well am 28 weeks pregnant am not with the dad never have been i love my lil girl to death and cnt waiit till she here but sum tyms i cnt help thinkin wud it have been better to have got an abortion i no it sounds horrible and i feel it for thinking it but its just tht im on my own yh i have ma frends n family but thy dnt understand the dad dus want to c her but i ant seen him in lyk 10 weeks cz he gt a new gf i lurv my bby n wud du nethink for her and am so glad im having her but i just feel like i have no life as i cnt du much will this change wen she born cz i dnt wna strt blamin her cz she has dun nuthin rong she means evrythink to me n i lurv her but i just wish the circumstances were different sum 1 wb please xxx

      #20358
      Meg11

        Hey you…I just wanted to let you know that it is normal to question things such as should haves or what ifs…but the most important thing right now is that you DIDN’T have an abortion, you will get to see her face, hear her voice, watch her grow, you will have the strain and challenge of being a single mom (it is not impossible though) and you may have more sacrifices at your age than your friends but you will never have the what ifs and should haves like the mom who aborts her baby and that is something to be so thankful for…I don’t think you are horrible for having the thoughts and what ifs on it but once your baby is born and her little fingers wrap around one of yours those thoughts and your sacrifices will not compare to the love you will have for her and receive from her, the dad is not all that big of an issue, he may come around a lot at first with the hype and adrenalin of a new baby but he will either walk away and leave you alone or he will stick it out and be a good dad, either way it will work out for the best, I have one of each, my daughters dad doesn’t even look at her if we see him in the store and my sons dad is here every other weekend picking him up, if he stays away then you don’t have to deal with him and he still owes support, you wont have to worry about what she sees or hears when visiting and that in itself is worth it for me to not have to send my daughter with her dad…if he sticks it out and is easy to get along with that is good too, my sons dad told us yesterday with a smile that we should be getting child support soon, he was even excited that they took his tax return so he can owe less back support, I about fell over at his friendliness in the conversation but it is better than dealing with someone who wants to see their kid and not pay support…just take some deep breaths and know that no matter how he acts after she is born you have the upper hand and can make many of the important calls without him having a say…you can make it through, just don’t beat yourself up for having a momentary what if though pop up in your head…rather hold your head up high because you made a beautiful and honorable decision regarding bringing this precious little girl into the world and despite what happens after her birth you will be fine…You are strong and you can be proud of yourself…I hope this helps a bit…Meg

        #20361
        kez_mummy_2_skye

          i felt the same sort of way when i was first pregnant, but not about the abortion so i noway thought of that. I kept thinking is it going to break us up? Will i do alright? Will i cope? things like that and its all normal and i agree with Meg that just think that you didnt get the abortion, where would u be now? Probably regretting every part of it.

          #20409
          justkeepsmilin

            iyah yeh ano a wud regret it cz this bby my world am jst stressed tryna get evrything redy for her cumin i want it all to b perfect thanks for advice xxx

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