Please help me.

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  • #11794
    mellomarvelous

      I am only sixteen and I just found out today that I am pregnant. I am so scared and I don’t know where to turn. All of the friends that I want to tell seem like they wouldn’t care. I feel like no matter who I tell, they won’t care. I feel like dying. How am I going to finish high school? Am I ever going to be able to go to college like I wanted? I was never a bad child. I always got good grades and was never a problem. I met this boy only six months ago and we had an experience that some might venture to call love at first sight. I doubt I loved him but the attraction was undeniable. We decided to take our relationship to another level a few weeks ago and we were using condoms until I got my period and we decided that it would be safe to have unprotected sex. We used the pull out method thinking that almost made our chances of getting regnant impossible. We were wrong, once we did it without a condom and I still had my period hormones took over and we did it several more times, unprotected. I finally saw that blue plus sign on the pregnancy test tonight. I couldn’t stop staring at it and my boyfriend and I broke down crying in shock and fear but no regret. We love each other with all our hearts and he vowed to never leave me and be there throughout the whole pregnancy and the babies whole life. I am scared though because his parents do not like me because of my cultural background. My boyfriend and I come from very different backgrounds and they clash, although we are both Caucasian. I am afraid that because we are only sixteen his parents aren’t going to let me see him any longer and that would mean I would have to get through this whole pregnancy by myself. Without someone who took just as much part in it as I did. I am crying as I write this wondering if he will leave me to pursue his dreams when he realizes that I am not joking or that this is real. I know that we have really no rights and I was wondering if anyone knew what few rights we do have? I really need some advice and support. I feel like strangers might be my best friends right now, especially people who are in the same boat as me or have been there. Please girls, I need you.
      Love,
      The good girl.

      #11810
      Kaileyamanda

        Hey babe-
        I think you’ve come to the right place. So many girls here have been through what you’re going through now. I was 16 when I got pregnant too. I just turned 17 and I’ll be 28 weeks on the 20th. We don’t ever expect these things to happen to us but obviously, it happens quite frequently. You said that you are worried about finishing highschool. Most schools are required to offer a "home-bound program." That is what I’m going to after I have the baby and then I’ll go back to my senior year. You can use it for a few months and then return to school when possible. You could go to an "alternative" high school or even do another home program like Faith Academy. I’m getting a lot of help from my family and maybe your family is really supportive too? If not, a lot of the "alternative" schools have daycare there. For college maybe your boyfriend could watch the baby while you do schooling or you could do online courses. There are sooo many possibilities! Are lives are far from over! We can still do all of the things we wanted if we put our minds to it! You seem like such a smart girl! I think that you are going to do very well. We just have to be mature about everything. I’ve been with my boyfriend for 3 years (he was my first kiss). He’s been my only one, so I’ve always been a "good girl" boy-wise and in school as well. Still, my dad was sooo furious. Parents can sometimes do the thing they think is safest in this situation and take you away from eachother. But, don’t be discouraged because they are parents and they know the effort needed on both sides to make everything work out for the baby. As far as rights- we don’t really have any more than we did. You control what happens to your baby though. Lots of people will tell you to get emancipated. However, thats just really not the way to make it into the best situation. You lose any support you had from your family. I think your boyfriend will be fine too. Just don’t hold so tight that you suffocate him. Don’t let yourself be a doormat but just let him live a little because he sees this as the end of the world pretty much (lol) whether he says it or not. But they get to be fine.
        I think you are going to do wonderfully! Keep faith! You have a new life to take care of, someone that is going to love you no matter what! Its a wonderful time! Congrats! let me know if you ever need to talk! (just stop by my profile on here)

        ~kailey

        #11814
        lissy012207

          Im 16 and pregnant also. Im 5 1/2 months along. Although my boyfriend is 21, we still had the hardship of telling my parents. i now, no longer talk to my father or family(not that i really talked to them before). And my mom is my best friend right now. shes helped me so much. im doing cyber school so i can get my highschool education and i am going to go to college. you can do it. its not impossible. if your parents tell you that you HAVE to get an abortion, you can say no. they, by law, cannot make you get one. thats one right that you do have. you may be their child but the little being inside you is your child. Theres plenty of teenage moms that make it even better than non teenage moms. Id strongly reccomend not getting an abortion for two reasons. one: read some of the girls storys on here and you’ll understand. and two: if you want to have kids in the future, an abortion might take that chance away bc some ppl cant have kids after an abortion. if your and his family take it out of control and tell you that they wont help you and they may even threaten to kick you out but once they see the child on the sonagram or hear the heartbeat, they SHOULD come to terms with it. if not, theres plenty of help you can get. if you need ANYTHING, email me back. ill gladly answer any questions, and ill gladly hear what you have to say 🙂 goodluck

          #11929
          Morbis

            hey girl, i know what your going though. I havn’t told my parent yet, and i’m very worried that they will freak out. I was to ship out for the Air Force in December and my mom was going to sell the house and move out of state. I can’t really talk to my friends about this either because they have never been here before. My boyfriend is in denile as well. I would really like to talk to you about all this, share experances, fears, and hopes and what not. I have already finished HIgh school, and am 19. But i still have the Air Force thing to deal with, so I know what your feeling when it comes to finishing school. Please E-mail me so we can talk.
            :kiss:

            #12003
            Anonymous

              hey hun
              I am 20 years old and I had my son when i was 16.It is hard but you can do it.
              Don’t worrie about his parents my son fathers parents Do not like me at all but they love there grandson with all there hearts. It you have any questions just [post here] and I will help you both out any way I can.

              Post edited by: acas, at: 2006/09/30 21:40

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