My first appt. was BAD!

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  • #13991
    jessie_03_17

      So today I had my first doctors appointment yesterday and the doctor was not nice. They did my physical exam and are still going by the date if my last period to figure out my due date. I talked to my mom and she said that they should know how far along I am. My family doctor thought I was about 12 weeks and this guy said I am only 7 weeks. They also want to wait 13 more weeks to do an ultrasound. I also had no bloodwork or anything done. During the question part he asked if my bf and I were planning on getting married, and then asked if we went to college. He said that if we didn’t go to college we wouldn’t be able to support ourselves or the baby. I think this guy just needs to mind his own business!!!!!!!! Has anyone else had an exprience like this? Please share? And when was everyone’s first ultrasound. Any answers would be helpful!!!!!

      #14005
      goodluckyall

        He probably was asking you the tough questions thinking he was making you seriously contemplate the reality of your situation. He wasn’t very tactful, but as a physician, he probably sees many girls in similar situations and is probably worried about the trend. You’re going to have to steel yourself for more comments and questions because they’ll be coming as you show more. This is par for the course when you are pregnant as a young teen. I’m sorry it annoyed/hurt you, but this is just the beginning. He would do you and all his patients a disservice if he sugarcoated and made out like life will be peaches and cream for you. It’s going to be hard and he wants you prepared. Again, he might have been nicer about it.

        Ultrasounds are not good for the baby. Don’t be in any hurry to have them. They normally don’t do them until you are in the second trimester, which is why they can detect the gender of the baby. In the old days, if you got one at all, it was just that one unless there were problems.

        #14029
        Mommyof2babies

          the dr had no right to treat you like that..its his job to protect and help unborn babies and keep them healthy..i would talk to somebody about the way you were treated..it doesnt matter how young you are its not right that he did that..and why he wants to wait for the ultrasound i couldnt tell you..i had my first ultrasound with my daughter at 8 wks to determine due date..thats only way to know for sure when your due..Ultrasounds are not bad for the baby they help determine weight length birth defects normal heart beat etc…i would go to a diff dr this one really doesnt sound like he knows what hes doing..

          #14038
          Hermia2012

            hey girl that sucks… but she is right… he is probably just worried but if he makes you nervous and he doesnt stop then you probably might want ot find a new doc. but wait on the ultrasound part. they will come one of these days. trust me.

            #14064
            kez_mummy_2_skye

              I would of asked him to mind his own business. When i went to the drs to get pregnant and find out why it wasn’t happening, the dr turned to me and asked if either of us worked. Its not up to him. If you know that u can support a baby then do it.
              Its not right that the dr couldn’t tell when your bubs is due.Thats their job. Maybe see if you can go and see someone else that will look after you.

              #14077
              gina lynn

                what a jerk! he has no right commenting on you personal life! i wish you the best and hope you find a better doctor soon.

                #14138
                jessie_03_17

                  I’m actually not a young teen I will be 22 soon. I have a good job I have benefits, I have my own apartment so I think this doc. was way out of line.

                  #14151
                  mrs_meliss

                    i would choose another dr. that is ridiculous! he should not treat you that way at all.

                    #14157
                    goodluckyall

                      Well, that does put a different perspective on things. If that was your first appointment, you certainly have plenty of time to switch. Maybe you could ask around for a referral to someone with a good reputation. In my first answer, I assumed he was trying to prepare someone young (early teens) for the kind of questions to be expected, but if you’re older, he’s got your file with insurance, age, etc, so his comments sound like he was just being a jerk. Good luck in finding someone with a better bedside manner.

                      #14163
                      barbermama1

                        I had a bad experience with a obgyn 8 years ago. I was 18 and pregnant with my third child and started bleeding at work. I knew what was happening so I went to the hospital. They ran some tests and did a vaginal ultrasound and found no baby. The doctor came in and said you are having a miscarriage. Of course I started to cry even though I wasn’t very far along it was still my baby.Then the doctor had the nerve to say before you start bawling you were very early into the pregnancy. My boyfriend(husband now) was right beside me and told him he better call security or get out of the room. You can imagine how the rest went down. Needless to say there are some very rude, nosy and heartless doctors out there. If you do not feel comfortable with this doctor I would suggest finding a new one. Havin a baby is a big deal and it helps if you have a doctor you really like. Trust me there are some wonderful ones out there.

                        #14164
                        jessie_03_17

                          good news i found a new doctor! she was great i go back tuesday for my first ultrasound. they did my bloodwork and everything. she even made me excited about having this baby, and even told me to hang on to my boyfriend because he is obviously a good guy! i can’t wait for the ultrasound, my boyfriend, my mom, my sister, and my boyfriend’s mom will all be there with me. i will keep everyone posted!

                          #14167
                          Anonymous

                            your doctor had no right to treat you that way, he seemed to be bringing religion in with marital questions and that is not his business. and why he is waiting another 13 weeks is beyond me, i had a vaginal ultrasound that determined me when i was six weeks along. i would get a new doctor.

                            #14182
                            Kaileyamanda

                              my 1st doctor was totally like this! he acted like my boyfriend and i were stupid and just other teen statistics. plus- i didnt like laying on the table all exposed and stuff, so i tried to keep as little showing as possible and he goes "well how did you get pregnant?" i was super embarassed. then i changed and got an amazing doctor!

                              #14243
                              mommytoele

                                Hi there. I am not sure how old you are, but since I was 15, when I got pregnant- (and gave birth)… the doctors were not so happy with me, you could say. Pretty much, they hate when teenagers get pregnant, which I can’t blame them. Since, there is an innocent child invovled, However, my first ultra-sound was on my first doctor’s visit- they wanted to see how far along I was, and how the baby was doing. My NOW 3 year old. Anyhow, if you feel uncomfortable with the doctor you have, you might want to consider changing doctors- or where you go. How far along are you, do you think? Do you have a supportive family and/or boyfriend, and do you go to school?

                                The doctor’s sometimes, just want to know your goals, and such… =)

                                Nicki

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