Mother vs. College

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      Hi girls! I have been a member on here since 2007- how time has flown is beyond me!- since I got pregnant and now I have an adorable, healthy little 3 year old. I am now 18 and in my freshman year of college at The University of Tennessee. I am not with his father, who lives in another state, and my little boy stays with his grandparents and sees me generally every other weekend and on holidays. Right now, I am facing a couple different decisions with my battle between college and being a mother. I absolutely love my college town and the huge SEC football games, I have made some amazing friends who love both my son and I, and I am in an awesome university that I worked my butt off to get into. I love everything about it, except that my little boy isn’t here with me. I am very lucky to be in my situation, but it is so difficult to be in. I have the choice (against my parent’s wishes) to transfer to a smaller 4-year college that is much closer to my son and possibly get an apartment with him, or wait another year to move out with him until I settle on my own. Right now I am 3 hours away and get the normal college life: I’m in a sorority, just being a college student, but it just doesn’t feel like where I want to be. I am always constantly searching and hoping for years to pass so that I can graduate and be a nurse and get on with my life. I feel like my life is on hold from doing what I really want to do. But I don’t know if I need time to just grow up and be an 18, 19, 20, and 21 year old before I become a full-time mom, or is that even right to think about? I need some serious advice about what to do with my situation. Am I just being weak and need to be stronger for my education or am I having a legitimate concern in my wishes? This is a very difficult decision and I might have to go against my parents, as well. I love my parents and am very lucky, but I just don’t know what’s best for my son’s future, as well as mine.


        I think you are facing a legitimate issue. Knowing that you feel a bit unsettled about things shows that it’s a real concern of yours. I’m glad you want what’s best for your son and you, and the decisions you make may be hard. Have you made a list of options? a list of reasons you might choose each option? have you checked out any local support groups for student moms? I’m so glad you have good parents who care about you and your son as well. I hope you will be with your boy soon.

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