Just looking for support

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      Hi my name is kayla, i havent posted on here in about four years so im sure no one knows me anymore…
      I have a four almost five year old son who i had when i was 15. I am now 19 almost 20 and 12 pregnant with number two. my husband and i also father of my son just got married in december… since then we have gotten a duplex together, planned another child, and got pregnant. all planned. But for some reason, he doesnt support me. not the pregnancy.. but everything else. He thinks i fake the nausea, and aches and pains, and everything else. i also have a vulvar disease (the outside vaginal area has nerve damage so it always itches) so its really hard to want to have sex when it feels like a flaming yeast infection ON TOP of all the pregnancy symptoms. But yet my husband becomes angry because i dont want to have sex because its itchy painful and un comfortable. he has even at one point accused me of USING him to get pregnant, but not wanting to be with him. now when he is home, if he isnt yelling or saying mean things to me… he ignores me and hangs out with his friends. I’m just looking for some support because my family doesnt like him… because of when we were young we fought alot.. and i dont have friends. so it would be cool if i could find someone to talk to on here.. someone real.. that doesnt make up stories for pity.. or attention. and i would love to be there for someone who needs support also.. as i was a teen mother.. and it was tough… but i made it through with a wonderfull son.. who i raised mostly by myself his father wasnt there until recently.


        I remember seeing your name in some recent posts when I first joined up just over 3 years ago…welcome back, congrats on the marriage and baby #2!! So I want to first state that because you are married the advice I have to share is different then that which I would share with someone who is not married, I strongly believe due to personal experience that a sexual relationship in marriage is different then outside of marriage…anyways in marriage your sex life needs to be healthy and fulfilling for both you and your husband…yes there are times that our husbands need to allow a little more space sexually and especially if you have a disorder that causes you to be uncomfortable during sex, and as we know pregnancy just intensifies the good and the BAD….have you talked with your doctor? Maybe talk with your doctor with your husband present…I know that there are certain kinds of lubrication that are water based and ph balanced to be very natural and something like that could help in your situation a little, there is also ways of engaging your husband and fulfilling his sexual needs and wants without actual intercourse, I think if you make a solid effort on your part to show him that his needs matter to him, that you love him and want to make him feel good and give your full attention to him during your efforts to let him know that he will then begin to understand that you are not just making excuses, communication is HUGE….here is my email address, meg@standupgirl.com ,I would love to share more with you and offer you a little bit of knowledge that I learned from a book that has changed my marriage….I was promiscuous before I married my husband and I tended to be more of the sexual aggressor in the relationship and this book helped me realize that I was using him the way all the guys in my past had used me…it was a huge wake up call and I have since learned how to be truly intimate with him while meeting both of our needs physically and emotionally in our marriage bed….sex and marriage go hand in hand and there is a way to meet both of your needs without one or the other feeling used/pain/rejection etc…Much Love and I will talk with you soon when you email me..Meg

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