Insensitive adults & teen miscarriage.

I don’t know if I’m the only one to experience this, but I am 16 and had a miscarriage this past December. This is the response I got from just about every adult when they found out “That’s too bad, but it’s better this way. You don;t need a baby right now, you can always try again later.”

My question is this: How can anyone possibly think that is comforting to someone who has just lost a child?

I’ve also had someone tell me that I was lucky I lost him/her, because labour hurts, and responsibilities suck. That is just complete ignorance. Unlike a lot of pregnant teens, I was excited about having a baby. I was happy, and looking forward to it. I wanted the responsibilities. Now don’t get me wrong, I;m not an idiot. I know how stressful sleepless nights and a screaming baby is, and how much harder everything would have been, but I have a very strong and loving relationship with my boyfriend, and we BOTH wanted that baby. So I think it is just completely insensitive to say to a woman “It’s better that you lost your son/daughter because now your life will be easy”. That’s what the above statement translates into. It is not comforting in any way. Ready or not, a lot of girls get excited about being a mother, regardless of age. It’s heartbreaking to lose a child, at anytime. But as a teenager, it’s just that much worse, because you have to try to go back to being a normal teen. And that is impossible once you’ve felt the reality of being pregnant.

Does anyone out there agree with me here? Isn’t this insensitive crap just plain wrong?