how does everyone deal?

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  • #22015

      I’m about 22 weeks along, and i cant help but think about my life before i got pregnant, and how i’ll never have that back. somtimes im completely overwhelmed by it. and i feel of all the girls on here, i have the least right to feel this way, my boyfriend has been there since day one, never wavering in his responsibilities as a future dad. my parents have been more supportive then i couldve ever hoped for, and my friends too, but still i cant shake this feeling of lonliness. like ive changed everything and theres no going back. i know this is true, but right now im having a hard time seeing how theres any way the future will be as good as the past.At the same tiem i feel guilty for feeling this way because in the past i was involved with alot of things i shouldn’t have been, i was really into drugs and i drank alot too, i had so much freedom…and now it’s all gone. i quit everything once i got pregnant, i would never put my baby in danger for my own selfishness, but ugh idk i guess i just wanna know how everyone else deals with these feelings, you know, in a healthy way…heh seeing as im not too familiar with that…


        Everyone deals with this in their own way. Life is not over, it has changed but it has changed for the better. If you have a support system you are very fortunate this will allow you to go out to the movies, dinner etc and someone you trust can watch the baby. I think you will feel much different after the baby is born when you have that connection and you realize that when one door closes another one opens. I know this is easier said then done but don’t worry everything will work out. You are very lucky to have so many people that support you and everything else will fall into place. i wish you the best of luck. Jessica


          Something that might help is to invite your mom or some really good friend to relax and visit over a cup of tea with you. Your mom might be able to help you think of the ways that the future might be even better than your past. 🙂
          I think that it’s great that you quit drinking and drugs and everything so that your baby will be healthy. Sounds like you’re going to be a good mom. 🙂


            Its all an adjustment. You took the first step in quitting all the things you were doing. It’s going to be rough and you might want to go back to it afterwards, but don’t its too easy to get sucked back into that world and the drugs make you thingk you’re super mom and you really aren’t. You don’t realize the affect it all has on your child until they are grown up and you start to notice what all they saw has done to them.
            These feelings are all normal for you to feel before a big change in your life. Its like your mind is going over all that was and all that is going to be, playing tricks on you with all the what ifs and worst case scenarios.
            The future will be better than the past, you will find joy in life and the life you have created. YOu will find any lonliness filled with companionship from someone who loves you even when you’re ugly or moody. Enjoy these years because believe me, as much as you may have heard it before it is true- these years pass by so fast and you never get them back.. I learned my lesson.. I was thinking about it the other day when I realized my first born will be 20 on weds and I can’t recall the baby years..drugs took that from me…


              Honey,don’t feel guilty for feeling overwhelmed or stressed out,this is a life changing experience so of coarse you’re going to feel sad and lonely from time to time.Even with lots of support, I know pregnancy can be lonely sometimes especially if you are a young expectant mother.I felt very isolated when I was pregnant w/ my son Landon, I was 16 & none of my friends had babies & I thought I would never feel like a normal teenager again.When the baby comes you will feel so thankful & blessed that a lot of those feelings will go away & trust still can have fun with your friends & do many of the things you did before after the baby you just need to plan ahead & make sure the babies needs are met first.It’ll all work out,its sounds like your boyfriend is a stand up guy and you’re lucky to have someone so supportive & maybe having this baby was a sign to show you that some parts of the life you had before needed to change(like drugs/drinking)My husband also used drugs before we had our son & once we had the baby he realized he needed to stop cause his son depended on him & he wanted to be the best dad he could be.Your future will be not only be as good as the past, it’ll be better because you guys will have a beautiful baby to share it with.Talking to other young mothers will help you with these feeling you’re having because you can talk to girls who have been in you shoes.This website is great cause there are so many amazing, strong,caring girls who are always here to help.I’m here if you ever want to talk or just vent your frustrations.xoxo Savannah


                noway you will feel bad. A baby brings so much joy to you.
                Its a different change. Id have changing nappies over a party anyday. Seriously!!
                But like one of the girls said. You will deal with it in your own way. Your hormones are running wild right now.
                Hope you get some relief soon 😛


                  you’ve changed my view of this problem completely.
                  thank you so much.
                  your response meant the world to me.

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