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      i am 22,I am looking for some advice, i have a 17 month old daughter that is my world, She has a wonderful step dad i could not ask for any better, but latley i am thinking about her real dad, am i making the right choice of not trying to find him and give them contact, Lookin to chat with some ppl that are in the same boat and what you guys think of it. I am so lost, i am wondeirng if i should be getting him invovled or just leave it because she has a wonderful step dad…


        I think you should try to contact him and get him involved. If your child will not know him when she hits teen years she will not bond and she will feel sad and confused. I dont know my dad and that brought a lot of emotions. A step father even if he is great, its not the same the child can feel the lack of something. Right now I do not want to know my dad. First I blamed my mom but he’s the one who did not contact me hes the “bad guy” in my eyes. I dont understand how can somebody live with knowing that their child is somewhere out there and they have no idea who he/she is. They could pass them on the street and not even know it. Try your best but if he does not get involved its not your fault you’re doing what you can do make your child happy.


          i think you have to contact him., and let your daughter know him as her father.,it was your daughter’s rights., i think this could help


            I think you should contact him and try to get him involve so that way u gave him the choice and didnt make it for him and u can tell ur daughter who he his if she gets old enough and want to pursue that good luck


              i’m sort of in the same boat. my daughter is three and is very aware that most all of her friends have dad’s. she goes to christian preschool because her gma pays for it, and most of the kids there and the stories all have dad in them. she calls me dad, gma dad, her friend’s dads “dad”. her father lives way across the ocean near russia. he is from here originally, and visits home once or twice a year. he is married now and has a six month old daughter. i’m afraid she will put him on a pedastool because he shows up with gifts and doesn’t discipline her. he asked me to abort her. i’m not sure how to approach this. i don’t want to villify him either. i’m trying to let go of rage and do what is best for my daughter. my parent’s hated eachother most of my life, and it was hard on us kids. i still don’t really know my dad. i’m not sure i missed much. he wasn’t there to protect me, neither is my daughter’s father.

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