Heres my story..

I was 13 when i met my sons father, the night i met him he was arrested.i turned 14 .. and He called me three months later to tell me he was out, we met up, and of course the mistakes began…. i had sex with him, and three months later was pregnant. during this time, we were NEVER steady… always breaking up, always fighting… but convinced it was ment to be. He had been kicked out of my house because my parents didnt like him, and we had been living with a friend… wheni found out i was pregnant.. i moved back home.. he was there for about two months after i found out i was pregnat… and then he threatened my mom .. he said he would kill her, we got a restraining order, yet that still didnt stop me from trying to see him, we met in the park all through my pregnancy.. i showed him ultra sound pictures… and told him how i felt.. atleast thats how it started… then he was very pushy about sex. that happened too.. even tho i didnt really want to. it felt like rape.. but i never said no. My parents found out we were seeing each other, droped the reestraining order, and shortly thereafter.. i had my son. three months later, he purposed… then ran off with an other girl. this continued on and off slowly getting worse for two years… i thought i was strong enough to tell him to leave.. it only lasted for three months.. he came back for two weeks… and he kept making me feel guilty for everything.. very pushy about sex… so on and such forth… i finally broke it off with only a single tear sliding down my face… knowing it was for the best. its only been about a month.. but im feeling wonderful without him. he sees his son once a week with me supervising until he gets visitations.. im not sure how long i can do this because he is so hard to deal with. but because of how he’s treated me.. the past relationships i’ve had with real men… i was terrified… i also have a problem when people get sexual.. because im afraid they wont listen to what i say … i now see why my family wanted me away from him… he’s scared me for life… i have to over come this… there were alot of things i didnt put in here… but if you ever feel like someone is persuading you to do something, or forcing you .. anything like that.. you know somethings wrong.. esspesially when its sexual… or just against your morals. he took all my morals away… made me someone who let EVERYONE walk on me… and now i have to slowly bring myself back up. i see people in bad relationships.. and they have NO IDEA how i relate to them… and i wish so bad they would listen… but its hard when you dont see the abuse. physical… sexuall… mental… its all abuse.. for me it wasnt technically rape… but i didnt want to do it… sometimes i would tell him to stop, and he wouldnt. for me it was abuse… if someone cant respect you… they dont deserve you.. i had to learn the hard way. but i hope others can learn from what i did, to prevent them from hardship, pain, and living the life i did for almost three years.