HOME › Hot Topics › Girl Zone › Personal Experiences – Just Let It Out! › choosing adoption – duedate5/11/08
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November 24, 2007 at 3:08 am #19670americanamelie
[size=2]Let me start off by saying I love my baby.
I absolutely without question love my baby-so much I would die for him/her, give him/her a kidney, take a bullet for him/her, etc…which is why I have chosen adoption.
I am 19, single, and pregnant. I can’t imagine bringing this blessing into a world that isn’t ready for it– financially and otherwise. God has blessed me with the opportunity to bless a married couple with a baby they (for whatever reason) couldnt carry these nine months.Here’s my story.
Fall 2006 I would’ve never imagined I would be in this position. It was my senior year of high school. I didnt drink, smoke, or do drugs, and I was saving myself for marriage. Long story short, Life is what happens when we tell God our plans— what we do to adjust to those obsticles is up to us entirely, and I handled these life changes completely wrong.
Mid-August I had sex with my boyfriend of just over a month in a bipolar episode of hypomania.
I am 16 weeks pregnant. The people who know about my pregnancy are a precious few; including my parents, sister, and the baby’s father. I will be moving several states away at the end of fall term to discreetly finish the remaining months of my pregnancy.
I spend my days at home, feeling alone. The two people I can talk to are thousands of miles away respectively. I’ve become completely family oriented out of necessity and I’m losing my mind. I need someone to help me feel joy throughout this pregnancy. I’m depressed and without energy…and I dont know how to do this alone.
If anyone can offer me normal pregnancy advice, get excited with me, etc….it would make me feel so much more human. I cant have people putting their hand on my stomache and asking if its a boy or a girl– the internet is the only place people can know. Please help me feel normal. :/one more thing; I love you, even though I dont know you. I love you for reading my story.[/size]
November 25, 2007 at 8:19 am #19680momtocoltonI wanted to tell you that you are a very brave and strong person to think about the life of your unborn baby… To give it life and to consider placing the baby for adoption to help a family that can’t have any or no more… I really think that you are very unselfish, loving and caring person… You should never feel ashmaed.. You should feel love.. I would love to give you a hug..I know that is probably the hardest decision that you are ever going to make in life and you are strong.. Thank you for making a families dreams come true… Thank you for sharing your story with everyone…If you ever need to talk please send me a message I would love to talk about pregnancy and answer any questions you might have.. I do wish you the best in life and hope that you will find the family of your dreams for your little baby.. Thanks again for your post…
November 25, 2007 at 9:34 am #19681lifeandmusic8975Sweetheart, I know you feel so alone. And it is so wonderful that you found this website. The girls on here are sooo understanding and helpful. You are making a very responsible and caring choice for your baby. You are celebrating your childs life just by choosing to let it live and live a good life for that matter. You are a very brave person and should not shut yourself out from having a good pregnancy and life just because you are pregnant at a young age. I know that I am having a very hard time with some of my family right now because of my pregnancy but I love my baby and I want to be excited for her even if no one else is. Even though I have chosen a little bit of a different route than you by choosing to keep my baby in the end both of our babies will know that they are very much loved by many people. So by all means go to the mall, go to the store, the movies and let people see that you are pregnant. Tell random people that you are pregnant. Be happy for yourself and YOUR baby, don’t be sad at every one elses expense. You and your baby are both very special people that both deserve to be happy no matter what the circumstances are. I commend you for your bravery and loving motherly choice to celebrate life and to not give up. I want you to know that you have a friend in me whenever you need someone. You are welcome to send me a message anytime if you need to talk. God bless you and have a healthy joyous pregnancy.
November 25, 2007 at 4:44 pm #19684alexanders_mamaBut why do you believe that being pregnant and single, and being 19 will stop you from giving a child a good life? Well, your choice really.
But women have stood up for their children through fire water and metal before in bad situations, materialism isn’t the main thing in raising children.
But congratulations on keeping the baby and choosing to give it life.November 25, 2007 at 9:02 pm #19688MonicathreeYou are a very selfless and brave young lady. I want you to know that the way you are putting your feelings after your little one’s is what a true parent (mommy) does. Many Many Many years from now when you come face to face with God, you will be able to look at Him and say Lord, I was terrified but I gave life to the child you gave me. Dear girl, you are a life giver and that is something that you should take comfort in. Also, please know, that although you feel alone, you are not. I know that there are many here that lift you up in prayer and also, more importantly, there is someone else with you…you always have God to lean on. Wow! I will pray for you and all the brave ones out there who choose life and I will pray for the ones who have not, that they turn back to God and seek comfort for their choice. There is healing. Take care…
Just a neat little fact…Faith Hill was adopted and so was DMC from Run DMC (the one who wears glasses!!!) ๐
November 26, 2007 at 2:19 am #19697justkeepsmilini just want to let u no tht u r very brave and i am sure the baby wiil think the same thing wen its older much lurv xxx
November 26, 2007 at 5:26 am #19700KylieAUSI kind of know how you feel. I was 20 single, scared beyond belief. I felt totally dissconnected from my baby and things didnt improve after the birth for a long long time. I started adoption counselling. Had my daughter placed in foster care pending adoption but then decided to keep her. I know inside your heart must be breaking, but you do what is right by you and your baby. He/She will understand and love you either way.
November 27, 2007 at 1:55 am #19717americanameliewow so many responses! every one of your responses have been unbelievably helpful, . Thank you all.
One really hard thing is that im a freshman in college, and as soon as this pregnant business happened…well to say my schoolwork has suffered would be the understatement of the year. My dad, as soon as he found out about the pregnancy…ever since then, the only thing he will say to me is how important my schoolwork is. "I cant stress enough how important school is right now…that is your JOB. It is the most important thing.." etc.. But it’s NOT!!!! And to have him say those things makes me feel hopeless and without options. This is so freaking hard to cope with without his crap!!
K. That was my rant. Thank you ๐November 27, 2007 at 6:58 am #19723KylieAUSI was in my first year of uni, and ended up dropping out of the second semester because of morning sickness. Uni/College can be delayed if need be.
November 27, 2007 at 10:41 pm #19730mommy2lucasyou are sooo brave idk how i could ever do that….i decided to keep my baby…i am 17 and a single mom but my parents are a great support…just curious as to why u have to move away….good luck with the pregnancy and i know god will be there with u through this all
November 28, 2007 at 1:18 pm #19741kez_mummy_2_skyei agree with Alexanders Mummy ๐
Having a child isnt all about materialism, its love. Hey not every child has to have everything out there, a baby can sleep in a drawer if you had to, i was given that advice if i didnt have anything and that was from an old lady. If the baby has the bare essentials ur sweet.
So many people told me babies cost alot of money- yeah right they do! thats only if you spoil ur kidNovember 28, 2007 at 9:56 pm #19745nadzai have so much of respect 4u, honestl and truely becoz u r not being selfish and snatching away his/her life by aborting him/her but u are instead giving him/her such a precious gift…if u eva wanna chat feel totally free
November 29, 2007 at 8:01 am #19751Mommy2Kylieoh hun I am so sorry you feel so lost and alone. I was 15 when I got pregnant. My daughter is now 2 1/2 years old. I am a freshman at MTSU. As hard and difficult as it may seem, its not as hard as most parents and friends think it will be. Im not gonna lie everyday is a struggle, but worth pulling out of no doubt. A child is a precious gift and at least you are giving it life. KUDO’S to you girl. By the way if you need to talk I love talking to people who have or are going through the same thing as I did and am, its nice to have ppl relate.
December 7, 2007 at 3:37 am #19825randomchyck220Hey maybe I can help, I’m 17 years old and 16 weeks pregnant. I’m having my baby 5/20/08 a little after yours. I’m really scared too, i work two jobs, i go to school /w two years left in high school, but the only thing thats different with me is that my boyfriend is still in the picture. Trust me, your family will come around to help you while your in school. My advice is to get a part-time or full time job while you go to school, save up as much money as you can, and who said you cant go to school with a baby? Its been done before and you can do it. At least your in college. I really envy you lol, I feel like dropping out everyday but the thought of my baby growing inside me keeps me going no matter what everyone else thinks/says. I’m doing everything and anything i can for the future of my child. Plus, there’s alot of financial aid programs, you dont necessarily need welfare or anything like that, but they have state programs for discounted daycare and stuff like that so you could still go to school. If you want any more advice im here =]
December 9, 2007 at 3:00 am #19865letsmakelove496I just want to say that I am so glad you decided to give this child life. whether or not you choose to raise it on your own, or choose adoption.. the important thing is that you chose LIFE. and thats the most precious gift you can give.
you should read The Girls Who Went Away by Ann Fessler.
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